The 2025 Random Awards! Celebrating the Best Moments of 2025

The 2025 random awards are here! I love handing out random awards to cool movies, and 2025 was loaded with a plethora of cool movies. Before I get into the random awards, here are my five favorite films of 2025 (I cheated a bit). 

1. Eephus
2. Baby Assassins 3
3. Resurrection
4. Hot Spring Shark Attack
5. Tied – 28 Years Later, Black Bag, Reflection of a Dead Diamond, Jane Austen Wrecked My Life, Sorry, Baby, The Empire, Kpop: Demon Hunters, 40 Acres, Sirat, Diablo, Warfare, Sinners, Nouvelle Vague, Splitsville, The Long Walk, The Ballad of Wallis Island,  No Other Choice, Sisu: Road to Revenge, Best Wishes to All, Beast of War, Train Dreams, A Little Prayer, Dangerous Animals, Presence, The Phoenican Scheme, One Battle After Another, Familiar Touch, The Naked Gun, Companion, It Was Just an Accident, F1, Deathstalker, The Secret Agent, Predator: Badlands, and Good Boy.

My favorite 2025 performances

1. Jane Levy – A Little Prayer
2. David Jonsson – The Long Walk
3. Marko Zaror – Diablo
4. Sophie Thatcher – Companion
5. Benicio del Toro – One Battle After Another
6. Dylan O’Brien – Twinless
7. Kathleen Chalfant – Familiar Touch
8. Lee Byung-hun – No Other Choice
9. Marisa Abela – Black Bag

Enjoy the awards!

Best Usage of the Word “Why?” Award – Play Dirty is not a good film, but it does feature a very funny moment involving a lady saying “Why?”

Best Google Spreadsheets Award – The Wedding Banquet knows that spreadsheets are very important. I love when Google spreadsheets are mentioned because I’ve created many of them.

Least Ominous Skull Tower Award – There’s nothing better than expecting an ominous skull tower, and then realizing it’s actually a beautiful monument. 28 Years Later rules. 

Best House Fight That Ends With an Exploding Fish Tank Award – Splitsville features a beautiful house fight that reminded me of the They Live brawl.

Best Grenade Fight Award – Watching Ana de Armas use grenades to destroy dozens of henchmen made me very happy. It’s an explosive scene. 

It’s Nice Seeing the Lady from The Dark and the Wicked Playing a Successful and Happy Character Award – It’s nice seeing Marin Ireland have a nice life and not have to worry about an evil demon.

Best Backstory Conceived By an Improv Actor Award – Orlando Bloom deserves an Oscar nomination for his work in Deep Cover.

Best Mouse Trap on a Train Award – Sisu: Road to Revenge might be my favorite 2025 action film. It’s absurd, silly, violent, cheeky, loaded with gore, and absurdly silly violent.

Best Foosball Related Death – Reflections in a Dead Diamond features an incredible restaurant battle. 

Best Tummy Punch Award – Watching Liam Neeson punching Danny Huston in the stomach will never get old. Tummy punches hurt a lot, I’m happy The Naked Gun showcased the pain. 

Best Camera Stuffed Inside a Person’s Head Award – Resurrection is a movie made by a person who loves movies. Watch it! 

Best Crying By An Actor Who Appeared in Alien: Covenant Award – Billy Crudup sheds some wonderful tears in Jay Kelly.

Most Emotionally Mature Conversation Between Sisters Award – Sentimental Value might be one of the most emotionally mature movies ever made. 

Best Kindred Spirits Award – Jane Levy and David Stratharin are wonderful together in A Little Prayer.

Best Hangout Movie Award – Nouvelle Vague is proof that Richard Linklater is the ultimate hangout movie director. 

Watch Out for Canadian Cannibals Award – 40 Acres is a fun action film and I’d happily watch Daniel Deadwyler kill more Canadian cannibals. 

Best Line Readings Award – Benicio del Toro is perfect in One Battle After Another and The Phoenician Scheme. 

Best Opening Credits Award – I’m a big fan of ballsy Marty Supreme opening credits. 

Best Plane Ride Taken By a Lumberjack Award – Train Dreams is one of my favorite 2025 films. It builds towards a beautiful ending. 

Don’t Drink The Water Award – If you find yourself stuck in a cave, please don’t drink magical water. Together is wonderful. 

Best French Alien Decapitation Award – The Empire is insane, and I hope Bruno Dumont makes more sci-fi films that take place in coastal French cities. 

Edith is the Cool Sister Now Award – I’m telling you, Edith is way cooler than Lady Mary and she proves it in Downton Abbey: The Grand Finale.

Best Eating of Submarine Sandwiches in a Submarine Award – Hot Spring Shark Attack is perfect – watch it. 

Tron: Ares is a Good Time Award – This isn’t a random award, but I love Tron: Ares and I want more people to watch it. Get over yourself and enjoy a fun chase film.

Best Tapeworm Award – The Ugly Stepsister features some excellent tapeworm pulling.

Best Fat Man Stealing Second Base While the Sun Sets Award – Eephus is my favorite 2025 film. 

Best Trudging Around the Scottish Countryside Award – I enjoyed watching Kōki trudge through the Scottish countryside in Tornado. It makes it better knowing that Tim Roth was trudging behind her. 

Best Problems on Problems on Problems Award – If I Had Legs I’d Kick You is a stressfest. Watching Rose Byrne deal with water damage, a sick kid, an absent husband and a maniac hamster is fun (but also stressful).

Best Jogging Award – Brad Pitt is an A + jogger. I love F1: The Movie. 

Best Dad Speech Award – Pruitt Taylor Vince is a super dad in Superman.

Best Casting for a Movie About Walking Award – The Long Walk features the best ensemble of any 2025 movie. 

Best Meth Gator Award – The Bayou isn’t great, but it features meth-crazed alligators eating people – which is neat. 

Best Moment That You Can’t Talk About Because It Would Spoil a Movie But You Really Want to Talk About it Award – Sirat is awesome. 

Best Lifting of a Potted Plant Award – Lee Byung-hun carries No Other Choice on his shoulders, and he also gets a solid shoulder workout when he picks up a heavy potted plant. 

Best Airplane Action Scene Involving Demons and a Kpop band Award – I love when Kpop bands fight demons. Kpop Demon Hunters rules.

Stop Messing With Scott Adkins Award – Listen y’all, stop messing with Scott Adkins. He kicks some butt in Prisoner of War. 

Best “Brighest Tool in the Shed” Award – Twinless is wonderful, and I hope Dylan O’Brien wins many awards. 

Best Severed Leg Award – The Secret Agent gives a severed leg a lot of screen time, and I like it. 

Best Safety Trunk Award – Shadow Force features an A+ safety trunk. 

Best Car Shop Improv Award – The Baltimorons is a melancholic delight that proves you can have an improv show anywhere. 

Jay Cluitt 

• Most normal child with nothing odd or suspicious about them – Ollie, Bring Her Back
• Best Front-flipping henchmen / toilet fight – Toxic Avenger
• Best Soup slurping – Vincent D’Onofrio, Caught Stealing
• Best use of hills in a car chase – One Battle After Another
• Best jump from a moving train – Sisu 2

Jonny Numb 

• The “OK, Boomer” Award: Anthony Hopkins, LOCKED
• Most Awkward First Date Award: THE SHROUDS
• The “Just Give it All the Awards So We Can Stop Talking About it” Award: ONE BATTLE AFTER ANOTHER
• Best 85 Minutes of Pure Escapism from Our Current Hellscape Award: THE NAKED GUN

Joey L. 

• Best Cat: Sorry, Baby
• Best Dog: Superman
• Best Unexpected Christmas Movie: One Battle After Another
• Most Hot Dogs: Weapons
• Best Use of Technology: Relay (sorry to M3GAN 2.0)
• Most Tears Cried: Hamnet
• Uncuttiest Gemsiest Movie: If I Had Legs I’d Kick You
• Most Delightful (or: Movie Most Made for Me): A Big Bold Beautiful Journey

Aaron Neuwirth

• Worst Sequel When it Comes To Removing a Key Aspect of the First Film: Ice Road: Vengeance
• Most Bang For Your Buck Indie Shark Movie – Hot Springs Shark Attack
• Best Jimmy Olsen – Superman
• Most Unexpected Discovery of a Dead Body while Wearing an Animal Costume – On Becoming Guinea Fowl
• Best Proof That Aging Doesn’t Turn You Into a Better Actor – I Know What You Did Last Summer
• Best Side Hustle to Being A Pop Star – KPop Demon Hunters
• Wildest Reason to Learn a New Language – Fantastic Four: First Steps
• Most Creative Monsters Created by a Pre-Teen – Sketch
• Best use of an Electric Saw for Love – Together
• Most Trashed Coffee Cups – The Naked Gun
• Best WTF – Josh Brolin in Weapons
• Best Rap Battle – Highest 2 Lowest
• Worst Feature Length Amazon.com ad – War of the Worlds
• Best Hanging Dong Moment – Splitsville
• Worst Times for Characters To Need to Relieve themselves – Tie – The Long Walk/ Avatar Fire and Ash
• Best Movie to Feature a Ding Dong Getting Bitten Off – Gladiator Underground
• Most Casual Depiction of Being Pinned Down by a Sniper – Under Fire
• The Marge Simpson Award For That Hair Is Just To High – Matt Smith in Caught Stealing
• Best Fall From a Rooftop – One Battle After Another
• Worst Christmas Adventurer – One Battle After Another
• Best Argument for Concussion in Sports – HIM
• Worst Results For Trick r Treating – VHS: Halloween
• The Dogma’s 25th Anniversary Award for Deserving Bigger Wings – Keanu Reeves – Good Fortune
• Best Retro Throwback Scene Based Around Use Out of Date Tech – Tron: Ares
• The Wicker Man Award for Best “Not The Bees” Related Disaster – Bugonia
• Best Secret Apartment – Tie – Secret Mall Apartment / Roofman
• The Hues Corporation’s Rock the Boat Award – Frankenstein
• Worst Human vs. Animal Scene – The Strangers: Chapter 2
• Best Reason to get a gift that says – “I went to Morocco for a rave and all I got was this stupid t-shirt” – Sirat
• Deadliest Grass – Predator: Badlands
• Best Dramatic Menu Read – Jay Kelly
• Best Home Dentistry – No Other Choice
• Best Aquatic Courtoom Scenes – Avatar: Fire and Ash
• Most Quaint Art Museum Robbery – Mastermind
• Best Excuse to Pick up a Copy of Breathless on Criterion 4K – Nouvelle Vague

Megan

• Most Cartilaginous Movie Ever – Hot Spring Shark Attack
• Best Gadget (light stick to jet ski) – TRON: Ares
• MVT: Most Valuable Timber -Sisu: Road to Revenge
• Best Robot Head Scratches – The Fantastic Four: First Steps
• Best Middle of the Night Mouse Murder – Sorry, Baby 
• Best Ikea Stool – Sentimental Value
• Best ‘Shining’ Reference in an Animated Disney Movie – Zootopia 2
• Best Generalized Anxiety (not social anxiety) – The Wedding Banquet 
• Best Bouquet of Flowers in a Pot – Materialists 
• Best Broke Theater Company – Play Dirty 
• MVR: Most Valuable Raft – Jurassic World Rebirth 
• Best Metal Detector – A Little Prayer 
• I want that back award: Best Acid Spitting Snake Bug – Predator: Badlands
• Best Waterslide Fight – Nobody 2