John’s Horror Corner: Dashcam (2021), the delightfully wild found footage horror that keeps getting gorier and crazier.
MY CALL: If you enjoy found footage and impressive lower budget fare (that never feels low budget), this is for you. This film is wildly bonkers and boasts more impressive and gory special effects than we generally expect from the found footage subgenre. Plus, the characters are well written and very likable. Strong rec.
Driving around streaming live improv-rap to amuse her fans, Annie (Annie Hardy) is a social media entertainer living her best (and often hilariously rude) life during the pandemic lockdown. Annie is quite likeable and equally annoying from the start, very grounded and funny, raunchy and pushy. Annie reunites with her old vlog-mate Stretch (Amar Chadha-Patel; Willow, Doom: Annihilation) in the UK as a diversion from the monotony of Covid life.
An interesting dimension to the film is Annie’s subscribers’ comments perpetually populating the lower corner of the screen. Sometimes you read them when a scene is slow, other times the comments cue you to look at the screen to see what they’re talking about. It’s a mildly distracting dynamic that I find enhances my experience. We likewise observe the polarized range of safety considerations and conspiracy beliefs revolving around the Covid pandemic, from mask rage to preaching propaganda.
When a stranger pays Annie to transport an obviously sick older woman to a specific location, Annie’s day takes an interesting turn. The old woman is disoriented, incontinent, and doesn’t seem to speak English (or at all). Far weirder are the inexplicable occurrences that surround this old woman.
But oh my God the incredibly gross and gruesome things that happen to and around this old lady are jarring! The characters scream and I find myself slack-jawed, lost in the lunacy. There are multiple POV car crashes, bloody shenanigans, and some positively demonic goings-on as well. This movie also features an amazingly gory arm-break. Wow! Much better gore and effects than we generally expect from the lower budget subgenre of found footage. Many of the visuals capture powerful images from classic supernatural concepts, other brief monstrous images leave me wondering what the crap I just saw (in an awesome way). And like a Sam Raimi movie, Annie Hardy and her co-stars are really put through the ringer by director Rob Savage (Host). Aspects of this film fondly reminded me of Brightburn (2019), Willow Creek (2013) and As Above So Below (2014). All the while the movie leaves you in the dark as to whether this some sort of pandemic zombie movie, demonic possession movie, supernatural somethiorother… we don’t know and I don’t care.
I liked all the characters, whose dynamic relationships kept things entertaining even in the earliest scenes. Once the horror truly begins, this film manages to consistently remain incredibly tense while still occasionally funny. I was quite taken off guard many times and I never felt the low budget woes of found footage here either. There’s a lot of blood, and anything not clearly in frame (thus saving money on effects) is very understandable given the panicked hat-cam situation. This was good! I am so pleased with how this turned out.
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The Movies, Films and Flix Podcast – Episode 433: Riddick, Hot Planets, Legendary Bad Days
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Mark and Norbert (@eddiecaine on Twitter) complete their Riddick trilogy series by discussing the 2013 film Riddick. Directed by David Twohy, and starring Vin Diesel, Katee Sackhoff, Dave Bautista and a cute CGI jackal, the movie focuses on what happens when a group of mercenaries attempt to capture Riddick (it doesn’t end well for them). In this episode, they also talk about Vin Diesel, legendary bad days, and the best moments in the trilogy. Enjoy!
If you are a fan of the podcast, make sure to send in some random listener questions (we love random questions). We thank you for listening, and hope you enjoy the episode!
You can download the pod on Apple Podcasts, Tune In, Podbean, or Spreaker.
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John’s Horror Corner: Alligator (1980), a huge animatronic alligator that is an absolute joy to watch.
MY CALL: No joke, this was way better than expected. And not totally in a “so bad it’s good” kind of way, which it is. But in a great animatronic monster movie kind of way. The animal attack scenes were wide shots full of monstrous glory swallowing victims whole on-screen. Just plain fun! If you don’t love this, then I don’t know what could possibly please you.
NATURAL HORROR SIDEBAR: Looking for more natural horror? Check out Night of the Lepus (1972), Frogs (1972), Bug (1975), Jaws (1975), Food of the Gods (1976), Grizzly (1976), Squirm (1976), Empire of the Ants (1977), Day of the Animals (1977), Orca (1977), Piranha (1978), Piranha II (1981), Of Unknown Origin (1983), Cujo (1983), Razorback (1984), Monkey Shines (1988), Slugs (1988), Gnaw: Food of the Gods II (1989), Shakma (1990), Arachnophobia (1990), Ticks (1993), Mosquito (1994), The Ghost in the Darkness (1996), Anaconda (1997), Lake Placid (1999), Rogue (2007), Pig Hunt (2008), Chaw (2009), Piranha 3D (2010), The Grey (2011), The Bay (2012), The Shallows (2016), 47 Meters Down (2017), Boar (2017) and Crawl (2019).
12 years after a young girl’s pet baby alligator was flushed down the toilet, chewed up dismembered human body parts and dead over-sized dogs have been turning up in the Chicago sewers. A private research company has been doing experiments on dogs with growth hormones, and the dead dogs have been dumped where they’ve been feeding this now hormoned-up alligator. Nice one, mankind! We’re just lucky the sewer rats didn’t get into it as well for some Gnaw: Food of the Gods II (1989) as icing on that toxic pollution cake.
The investigating officer David (Robert Forster; The Wolf of Snow Hollow, Psycho, Scanner Cop II, Maniac Cop 3) goes spelunking through the sewers only to witness in horror as his rookie partner is dragged away by a tremendous alligator. Of course, no one believes what he saw. Not even herpetologist Marisa (Robin Riker)—who might have lost a pet alligator 12 years ago.
The huge animatronic alligator is an absolute joy to watch. The effects may have nothing on Crawl (2019). But these clunky 80s monsters are not without their charm. When the beast bursts through concrete onto the city streets from the sewers below, we see the whole beast lumbering its body past cars for a sense of magnificent scale.
The movie doesn’t breeze by with the best pacing. The slow parts are very slow. But I just get such a kick outta’ seeing this monster on the city streets or eating a small child in a swimming pool that it’s all worth the wait. At one point, the behemoth ambushes a man from hiding in a giant trash heap in an alley and we see the entire monster with the man in his jaws, and then working his body down his gullet just as you may have seen a gator take a whole chicken at feeding time at the zoo! We have the pleasure of seeing this beast chew on several victims. Few movies offer such man-eating joie de vivre as was so happily delivered by director Lewis Teague (Cat’s Eye, Cujo). If you don’t love this, then I don’t know what could possibly please you.
The finale defeat of the alligator is rather anticlimactic, but at least we see the gator’s head explode. And oh, of course, there was another baby gator left behind… dun dun dunnnnnn! Although I’ve heard nothing but warnings to avoid the sequel/remake.
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John’s Horror Corner: The Exorcism of God (2021), an exorcism movie that starts strong, really strong…
MY CALL: This is a decent exorcism movie with a really great opening sequence. But it lacks the desired follow-through and consistent intensity promised in the early acts. Recommended to anyone who enjoys a spirited demonic possession movie. MORE MOVIES LIKE The Exorcism of God: For more quality exorcism movies I’d recommend The Exorcist (1973), The Exorcism of Emily Rose (2005), The Unborn (2009) or The Last Exorcism (2010).
Haunted by his deeply sacrilegious indiscretions of a past exorcism, Father Peter Williams (Will Beinbrink; It Chapter Two) has spent nearly twenty years in Mexico trying to atone for his sins. When he is summoned to a prison to assess possessed inmate Esperanza (María Gabriela de Faría) who asked for him by name, Peter is reacquainted with his sins rather directly. So he calls upon his elder exorcist Father Michael Lewis (Joseph Marcell; The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air) to aid him. Nothing an old priest and a young priest can’t solve, right?
I have often felt that the exorcism/possession movie subgenre is hard to nail in terms of credibility. How would a demon act? What kind of things would the devil say? Without the most vile gravity, it’s hard for me to believe the movie, the victim, or the possessing fiend. Many have tried and failed to impress me—among them The Rite (2011), The Devil Inside (2012), Belzebuth (2017), The Crucifixion (2017) and The Cleansing Hour (2019).
It’s easy to get carried away in the look or dialogue of the possessed. The make-up, visuals, sounds, words and behavior of this particular possessing demon rank high among possession movies when we first meet it. Lascivious seduction is a tool swiftly used by the fiend against its chaste perpetrator in the name of God.
The pacing is not as swift as I’d prefer, however the story builds well in its slower parts. Yet I wish the middle and end scenes were as provocative as the opening scenes, which really set my expectations high for the film. But alas, they simply could not keep up the intensity or demonic credibility. Not bad, but not as compelling as I had hoped with such a bold title—I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. Director Alejandro Hidalgo (The House at the End of Time) brought us a decent movie, even a good one, but I continue to struggle to find exorcism movies that can truly impress me.
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Quick thoughts – Grade – B+ – Cha Cha Real Smooth is an earnest and sensitive film that proves Cooper Raiff is a filmmaker to watch.
What’s great about Cha Cha Real Smooth and Sh*thouse is how writer/director Cooper Raiff is able to largely avoid “coming of age” or “feel good story” tropes by leaning into sharp observations (twentysomethings don’t have to fall into one stereotype) and sensitive moments that audiences haven’t really seen before. His characters mostly defy convention and I really wish they’d have been around when I was in college (I had “sensitive” movies like Garden State and college movies like Old School and Van Wilder) because Raiff’s films don’t seem like the stock-shlock that Hollywood has thrown at audiences for years. It’s nice that Raiff swings for the fences with his emotions and despite a few negative reviews that use terms like “naracissitic nazal-gaving,” the majority of critics appreciate his brand of optimisim and messiness. Since it’s only his second feature-length production it’s not surprising that there are big speeches, tiny speeches, and emotional speeches that take up a decent amount of the running time. However, unlike other first/second time writer/directors, these speeches don’t feel overly-written or inorganic. There’s no “life is like a necktie that wraps itself around my neck” speeches (Best example I could think of) that feel overly-clever or too pleased with themselves.
Cha Cha Real Smooth revolves around Andrew (Raiff) a recent college graduate who moves home to New Jersey to figure out his next step in life. His main goal is to move to Barcelona to be with his Fullbright scholar girlfriend, but when she starts dating someone else he’s forced to pivot to something new that doesn’t involve living with his mom (Leslie Mann), younger brother (Evan Assante) and Greg (Brad Garrett), his stepdad who seems totally fine, but is wildly loathed. His career prospects perk up when he finds himself at a bat/bar mitzvah with an empty dancefloor due to lack of proper party motivation. After he helps kick off the festivities by getting everyone dancing, he’s flooded with offers to be a party-starter for upcoming bar/bat mitzvahs. It’s during these parties that he meets Domino (Dakota Johnson) and her teenage daughter Lola (Vanessa Burghardt), and the three quickly form a friendship that gets messy as Andrew begins babysitting Lola and becoming too close to the engaged Domino.
I really don’t want to give away the rest of the plot because it veers into unexpected territory that shouldn’t be spoiled. Just know that Raif, Mann, Johnson, Assante, Garrett and Burghardt are all solid and they’re each given several moments to shine. The highlight of the film is the performance from Vanessa Burghardt, an autistic actor who worked with Raif to develop the role and make her into a very likable character with solid comic timing. I really enjoyed watching Raiff and Burghardt onscreen together because they become friends and equals who enjoy spending time with each other. Also, Dakota Johnson is excellent as always and she’s asked to do the majority of the emotional heavy-lifting by creating a character who is likable, damaged, mature, uncertain, and about 30 other adjectives. Raiff must’ve been stoked when Johnson signed on because she’s able to create a three-dimensional human who never feels like a character written by a love-lorn twentyseomthing.
Final thoughts: Watch Sh*thouse and Cha Cha Real Smooth because Cooper Raiff is a most welcome voice in the industry right now.
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John’s Horror Corner: The Cursed (2021), a most welcome spin to a gypsy curse film that is a triumph in its subgenre.
MY CALL: Don’t read too much about this film before seeing it; don’t seek out screen grabs or clips. It’s creepily atmospheric, graphically gory, and wondering if this is more creature feature or more Sleepy Hollow (1999) is a fine part of its unnerving charm. Strongly recommended! MORE MOVIES LIKE The Cursed: This movie reminds me most of Sleepy Hollow (1999), The Brothers Grimm (2005) and The Brotherhood of the Wolf (2001). For more “gypsy curse” horror, try Thinner(1996) and Drag Me to Hell (2009).
Ten minutes into this film and I know that director and writer Sean Ellis (Anthropoid) is someone whose work I now intend to follow!
Our opening war scenes in France are grim yet gorgeous, depicting the cruel hardships faced by soldiers and the war infirmary brutalities that were suffered by survivors. The gore here is grounded and realistic, but still viciously eye-turning as limbs are audibly sawed off of screaming patients and bullets are wrenched from abdomens free of anesthesia. Truly, this film aspires in its graphic gore at every opportunity and the wound work is wincingly outstanding. We likewise find excruciating hatcheting of extremities against gypsies… and such cruel offenses earn the perpetrators a gypsy curse.
There is something dire about watching gypsies melt down silver and pour it into casts to produce silver teeth, that would then replace the formerly human teeth in bone mandibles, created with the utmost care, respect and even reverence.
We later find young Charlotte and Edward tended by their affluent parents, the tender Isabelle (Kelly Reilly; Eden Lake) and their rather cold father Seamus (Alistair Petrie; Victor Frankenstein, Hellboy). When Edward is attacked by a wild animal and subsequently disappears, searches are conducted as another young boy is discovered in the woods, brutally mangled! To investigate the case, pathologist John McBride (Boyd Holbrook; Morgan, The Predator) is commissioned to find Edward. McBride’s methods span classic Holmesian means, from crime scene investigation to questioning people about the boy and even techniques including blood and microscopy. The story and curse escalate, some turning to denial and others to fear, and more people tied to the violations of the gypsies die.
The creature attack scenes are quite effective. You see just enough to know what the monster is doing and have a vague idea of the monster’s form, seeing more and more of the monstrosity with every encounter. Other scenes show victims of the gypsy curse entangled by animated tentacle-like viny roots, and a most anatomically gory, writhing and slimy autopsy scene kindles memories of The Thing (1982).
This was a solid film! Very well made, well executed, visually well told, and I was perfectly satisfied with the ending. I want more of this; more from the mind and vision of Sean Ellis!
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The Movies, Films and Flix Podcast – Episode 432: The Wizard, California and Video Game Tournaments
You can download or stream the pod on Apple Podcasts, Tune In, Podbean, or Spreaker (or wherever you listen to podcasts…..we’re almost everywhere).
If you get a chance please make sure to review, rate and share. You are awesome!
Mark, James and Norbert (@eddiecaine on Twitter) discuss the 1989 cult classic The Wizard. Directed by Todd Holland, and starring Fred Savage, Beau Bridges, Christian Slater, and Jenny Lewis, the movie focuses on what happens when three children hitchhike to California so they can enter a video game championship. In this episode, they also talk about dinosaurs, Nintendo, and deleted scenes. Enjoy!
If you are a fan of the podcast, make sure to send in some random listener questions (we love random questions). We thank you for listening, and hope you enjoy the episode!
You can download the pod on Apple Podcasts, Tune In, Podbean, or Spreaker.
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Jurassic World Dominion (2022) – Review: An Entertaining Sequel That Works Best When It Embraces Silliness
Quick Thoughts – Grade – B – Jurassic World Dominion is a globe-trotting adventure film that delivers some wonderful dino-carnage. It’s the best of the latest trilogy and it features the Pyroraptor (AKA swimming chicken dinosaur), which is quite possibly my favorite dinosaur featured in the six Jurassic Park films.
Taking place four years after Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom, the movie focuses on the franchise’s core characters coming together to stop the villainous Biosyn genetics from causing a worldwide catastrophe that involves giant locusts eating all of the earth’s crops (that aren’t genetically modified Biosyn crops – which is insane because everyone would know who modified the locusts)) and causing massive starvation (it’s bonkers). To do this, they meet up with new characters and travel to an Italian mountain range that is home to swimming chicken dinosaurs, gigantic laboratories, and the Biosyn headquarters. From there, new characters meet legacy characters and together they run from new dinosaurs that want to eat them. It’s silly stuff, but director/writer Colin Trevorrow and co-writer Emily Carmichael know that it’s silly, and they make sure to embrace family-friendly chaos that is occasionally a lot of fun. Overall, it’s better than the lifeless requel Jurassic World and the misguided (but still welcomely different) Fallen Kingdom.
There’s a moment in Dominion that puts a giant smile on my face, and that’s when the’ A-plot kicks off with a promise to a velociraptor. In the years following Fallen Kingdom, Blue the smart velociraptor from the two prior films was relocated to the Sierra Nevada mountain range and managed to have a baby named Beta. Blue and Beta live near Owen, Claire (Bryce Dallas Howard), and their adopted clone-daughter Maise (Isabella Sermon), who refuses to stay in the cabin after four years of being kept near or inside the home. One day, Beta and Claire are kidnapped by Biosyn thugs, and Owen promises Blue that he’ll return Beta safely to her. This leads Owen and Claire to Spain, where they team up with Barry Sembène (Omar Sy – Returning from Jurassic World) and attempt to rescue Blue and Beta. After a botched rescue attempt at a blackmarket that sells dinosaurs (and dinosaur meat?), Owen and Claire team up with a pilot named Kayla Watts (DeWanda Wise) who flies them to the Italian mountains. This is where they meet legacy characters Ellie Satler (Laura Dern) and Alan Grant (Sam Neil) who traveled to the headquarters to investigate the locust plague. The two groups teamup, and are aided by Ian Malcom (Jeff Goldblum) and Ramsay (Mamoudou Athie), the head of communications for Biosyn. Together, they get stranded in the large dinosaur habitat and find themselves battling new dinosaurs such as the Giganotosaurus (bigger than a T-Rex, and more mean), Therizinosaurus (Freddy Kreuger dinosaur),and Atrociraptors (meaner and bigger than velociraptors).
It’s a globe-trotting good time that is at its best when it veers toward silliness (AKA promises to raptors). The current 30% Tomatometer score seems harsh and I find it odd that some critics are complaining that there isn’t enough dinosaur carnage. This is odd because there is a wild amount of dinosaur carnage that involves Bryce Dallas Howard clotheslining an Atrociraptor with a metal pole during a chase in Malta. The movie is packed with fun new dinosaurs and despite being filmed during the pandemic, it has a large scale that makes it feel like a Jason Bourne film met a National Treasure movie and teamed up with the Jurassic Park franchise. The legacy characters from the first trilogy are all used well and have a reason to be there, and this trilogy’s cast seem more comfortable with their roles as the franchise has aged (I like Dad Pratt more than cocky dino-trainer Pratt). It’s the sixth film in a franchise that has gotten progressively more silly, what were people expecting?
Final thoughts – Jurassic World Dominion is a likable sequel that features several fun moments that make it worth watching on the big screen.
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MY CALL: This film may be best for less seasoned, younger horror fans less keen on shrill terror or eye-turning gore. For this very reason, I’m actually a bit surprised this wasn’t helmed by a first-time writer and director. Most qualities to be assessed in this film come off quite rough for me, but mine is a very critical eye. I liked the premise, but required much more in the execution.
Disclaimer: A screener was provided by a PR/Media group/company. I was not paid or compensated to write this nor were there any conditions to my receiving the screener other than my solicited review and the timing of its posting.
Short Summary from IMDB: “After receiving a mysterious letter, a woman travels to a desolate island town and soon becomes trapped in a nightmare.”
Where can WATCH NOW? RLJE Films will release OFFSEASON On Demand, Digital, DVD and Blu-ray on August 3rd. To watch on Amazon just CLICK HERE.
SOLICITED REVIEWS: On occasion I accept requests for solicited reviews. But make no mistake, I have a day job and limited time. My favoritism to accept solicitations leans towards those who offer a physical screener, but that favoritism does not de facto earn a favorable review—but a “fair” review. Examples of my solicited reviews include Séance (2021), Belzebuth (2017; US release 2020), Scare Package (2019), Iron Sky: The Coming Race (2019), The Haunting of Sharon Tate (2019), The Unseen (2017; aka Amourosis), The Belko Experiment (2016) and The Barn (2016).
Accompanied by her estranged lover George (Joe Swanberg; XX, The Sacrament, V/H/S, You’re Next), Marie (Jocelin Donahue; The House of the Devil, Insidious Chapter 2, All the Creatures Were Stirring, Holidays, Doctor Sleep) must venture to a tiny island village in Florida to address the desecration of her mother’s grave. Arriving just before the seasonal closure of the island to the public, the lone bridge is raised upon her entry. When things get fishy and they attempt to drive home, the roads become blocked by the local palmy flora as if a road was never there.
Weaving atmosphere, director and writer Mickey Keating (Pod, Ritual, Psychopaths) opens the film with Marie’s demented mother’s monologue. Clearly mad, or perhaps “touched” by some madness beyond, she instills a strong sense of gravity as she suggests that no place exists in which one can escape “them.” A bit cliche, but we are left to wonder what demons in the shadows, despicable people or maybe some other physical entities plague her thoughts.
The humble budget is most readily apparent upon every sight of “them.” Like a much older film, these “them” are powdered-ashen people with whited-out eyes, akin to a deadite but lacking any additional signs of demonic undeath. They generally stand motionless ineffectively staring at our movie’s protagonist. I think the inspiration was, among other movies, something to the tune of We Are Still Here (2015).
The gags in this film feel antiquated, the likes of which one may expect from a 60s horror film. A deranged old lady speaks creepy feelings into Marie’s ear before somehow disappearing, excessive use of fog is employed to get Marie lost in a graveyard and separated from George, the very manner in which “the island” prevents them from leaving, and the exposition dump from the bridge keeper (Richard Brake; 31, Mandy) all harken a bygone horror era. In fact, it seems that this film takes place in the 70s or 80s based on the car we see, the presence of pay phones, and the complete lack of any digital devices like cell phones.
What interested me most before seeing this film were the “Welcome to Innsmouth” lovecraftian vibes from the trailer. I hoped I was in for a retelling of Dagon (2001) with a more subtle approach (and thus, fewer tentacled fish monster people). The townsfolk tell a dark history of their island, and how long ago they made a bargain with a man who crawled from the sea. The bargain was to protect the island village from the deadly storms–but at a price. I was also getting strong folk horror vibes, wondering if Marie was meant to be some sacrifice to appease a dark God of the Sea or to abet the deadly storms.
Clearly the budget just wasn’t there for special effects. There is no gore or brutality, weak make-up, unrefined writing, and almost nothing in the way of scares. This film is a tonal creeper that isn’t successful in its goal. It seems like a very rough first draft of the film that was intended. Someone needs to give this filmmaker a budget so we can really see what he can do.
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Mark and Phil discuss the 1999 cult classic Fight Club. Directed by David Fincher, and starring Brad Pitt, Edward Norton, Helena Bonham Carter and a bunch of pungent soap, the movie focuses on what happens when a group of men see a guy punching himself in a parking lot (there’s a lot more to it…). In this episode, they also talk about space monkeys, book adaptations, and the filmography of David Fincher.
If you are a fan of the podcast, make sure to send in some random listener questions (we love random questions). We thank you for listening, and hope you enjoy the episode!
You can download the pod on Apple Podcasts, Tune In, Podbean, or Spreaker.
Movies, Films & Flix 