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Bad Movie Tuesday: Jack and Jill

March 13, 2012

There are two possible explanations for how this film got made.

1. The movie going populace has continued to shell out money for Adam Sandler’s increasingly subpar efforts thus making it inevitable that this film happened.

2. Sandler discovered an alternate dimension.

If you’ve watched the show Fringe you will know that there is an alternate dimension.  A world where you live a completely different life. I feel like Adam Sandler found this universe and made his movies there. In Sandler’s twilight zone there is no logic or realism and gas is aplenty.

Anything can happen in Adam Sandler films. The man has chosen to ignore all of life problems and instead make movies that prove the impossible can be possible. The stuff you see in his latest batch of films are truly awe inducing. This is a synopsis I never thought I would write.

“Adam Sandler tries to get Al Pacino to do a Dunkin Doughnuts commercial by pimping out his twin sister.”

It seems surreal to write that. It is like saying Michael Jordan would play for the Washington Wizards before they existed. Adam Sandler has a weird knack of casting celebrities in his movies. In his last movie Just Go With It he got Jennifer Anniston and Brooklyn Decker to fall in love with him. To top that off he gave the song “The Space Between” new meaning by having Dave Matthews pick up a coconut with his butt.

In Sandler land he can cast Oscar winners to do ridiculous things. He got Kathy Bates to eat an alligator head. He persuaded Jack Nicholson to cure his anger.  He put a grass skirt on Nicole Kidman and managed to woo Marissa Tomei.

Another thing linking all of Sandler’s recent films is that he is able to lie, cheat and ignore beautiful women into liking him. He treats women terribly and they end up falling in love with him. This could only happen in an alternate dimension where Sandler is a laid back gigolo.

Due to the odd nature of the Sandler universe Jack and Jill is plausible. He cast an icon to be his love interest. He dressed in drag and broke the record for farts and stereotypes. The movie is the definition of trashy gloss that he made fun of in Funny People. I wonder if there were any people on the crew shocked that Pacino was tickling Adam Sandler in drag?

If you are familiar with Sandler world you know there are the usual suspects who pop up everywhere. In this film he brought along Rob Schneider, David Spade, Nick Swardson, Tim Meadows, Allen Covert, Norm McDonald, John McEnroe, Johnny Depp, Shaquille O’Neal, Drew Carey, Michael Irvin, Regis Philbin, Norm MacDonald, Bill Romanowski, Billy Blanks, Jared Fogle, Christie Brinkley, Bruce Jenner and Dana Carvey to join him in multiple fart jokes.

Sidenote: My favorite Sandler regular is John McEnroe in Mr. Deeds (bad movie). John jumps over cars, dances with rastafarians and yells “you cannot be serious!”

The strangest part of the strange film is that Al Pacino is incredibly committed to his role of wooing Adam Sandler. Pacino works much harder than any of the cast. Sandler shlubs while Pacino yells, wears a fake beard and does a dance number for a D&D commercial promoting Dunkaccionos.

This movie is one of the laziest things I’ve ever seen. It deserved the 3% rating on Rotten Tomatoes and record-breaking 11 razzie nominations. The Sandler universe is becoming too familiar. The shtick is up and it is time he finds another universe to wreak havoc in.

Jack and Jill went up a hill to win a bunch of razzies…..They succeeded.

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