The Movies, Films and Flix Podcast – Episode 542 – Hellraiser, Clive Barker and Goo
You can download or stream the pod on Apple Podcasts, Tune In, Podbean, or Spreaker (or wherever you listen to podcasts…..we’re almost everywhere).
If you get a chance please make sure to review, rate and share. You are awesome.
Mark and John (MFFHorrorCorner on X) discuss the 1987 horror film Hellraiser. Directed by Clive Barker, and starring Doug Bradley, Clare Higgins, Ashely Laurence, and several pain loving interdimensional Cenobites, the movie focuses on what happens when a mystical box is opened. In this episode, they also talk about movie monsters, basements, and Clive Barker’s filmography. Enjoy!
If you are a fan of the podcast, make sure to send in some random listener questions (we love random questions). We thank you for listening, and hope you enjoy the episode!
You can download the pod on Apple Podcasts, Tune In, Podbean, or Spreaker.
Share this post:
Bad Movie Tuesday: Hellmaster (1992), a laughably bad ‘poor man’s Prince of Darkness’ about balding, murderous, cultist-like mutants.
MY CALL: The death scenes suck. The bad guys are lame. The villain has insanely questionable yet unexplained motives. So watching this with friends throwing vicious mockery at the screen is the recommended method of viewing. This is a deliciously bad movie. MORE MOVIES LIKE Hellmaster: Well, if you want something of the same ‘caliber’ as Hellmaster, perhaps Neon Maniacs (1986). But if you want something superficially similar but actually ‘good’, then I’d aim more for Prince of Darkness (1987).
This roughly made film struggles to find the feel of a real movie in its opening sequence. The scenes feel like scattered, incomplete thoughts as we meet students and faculty of the Kant Institute of Technology and we get glimpses of some undead-like drones lurking about.
Right away, we know that several professors are aware of what’s going on. No one seems to be contacting an sort of authorities or seeking help… but they know what’s going on. Robert (David Emge; Dawn of the Dead, Basket Case 2) seems to be our good guy, and professor Jones (John Saxon; Black Christmas, Blood Beach, A Nightmare on Elm Street 1 & 3) is the evil mastermind behind it all. Using a serum he developed, Jones has created ‘mildly mutated’ killers who serve him, call him father, and wander the college campus trying to kill whomever they encounter.
I’m not sure how an injection creates these instant followers with cult-like devotion and a sudden understanding of Jones’ grand vision and that they should all call him Father… but it does. The movie makes no effort to explain why or how—I question if director and writer Douglas Schulze (Dark Heaven, Dark Fields, Mimesis) even cared. Still, such a hokey premise could turn out to be a really fun bad movie, right? Well, you’d hope…
Watch out for some miserably terrible death scenes; like inept student film quality death scenes. The noose death scene actually added zero to the movie, which would have been truly better without the death at all. Oof! This movie is rough. The geometrically scarred killer (featured on many of the movie posters) whispers about desires for a “reward,” then goes on to kill someone with a 100% off-screen stab. That’s two big death scene strikes against this crap movie. And what’s this reward of which he spoke? Apparently, it’s a world populated by murderous, balding, Jonesian zealots. So Jones seeks world domination, and he decided to start on his college campus. I’m guessing at this, by the way. But he’s gonna’ need a worldwide vaccine distribution plan for this plan to work! Otherwise he’d die of old age before totally taking over New Jersey.
Many of these murderous mutants come off more like low budget zombies or generic brand Neon Maniacs (1986), slowly limping and lumbering about towards anyone who hasn’t yet received this injection. There’s a twisted ‘murder nun’ who gets stabbed in the face with a syringe, a child (or perhaps a very small man) with his hair burned off who dies of a goopy green and red ‘nosebleed to death’, an alopecia-stricken school girl giggles about… these Jonesians are not the most inspired creature creations of the genre. So, yeah. The “monsters” are weak and the death scenes are bad. Really bad. Yet the blood and gore is actually tolerable. Somehow our hero Robert figures out that a ‘little’ of the Hell serum creates the Jonesian fiends. But a bigger dose induces the gross, slimy, melty deaths we’ve seen a couple times.
So during this whole movie Jones struts around with a horrifyingly big ‘triple syringe’ he uses to inject his squad of hellions. It’s really hokey, and his lines about creating Hell on Earth are… well… stupid. But this whole movie is stupid. I’m not entirely sure what the premise even is! But I know it’s stupid. I mean, Jones wants pretty much everyone (on campus at the very least) dead. Not sure what his plans are after that… or why he’s doing this. But as I’m watching I’m realizing this strikes me as a poor man’s Prince of Darkness (1987) but without the physics or antigod. It all comes to a bloody finish as Jones burns to death and melts away. Meh. Just okay.
Not gonna’ lie. This is among the clunkier bad movies I’ve seen in a long while. But I guess this would make for a really fun, deliberately ‘bad movie night’ with friends.
Share this post:
John’s Horror Corner: The Power (1984), an Aztec demon, a greedy academic and a Ouija board.
MY CALL: Just okay. Not regrettable, but nothing I’m recommending either. Effects and gore are just too infrequent for me. MORE MOVIES LIKE The Power: For a much better horror experience with a Mexican doll, I’d recommend Dolly Dearest (1991).
Seeking to control the power of an Aztec demon called Destacatyl through an ancient relic, a wealthy academic travels to Mexico and murders the caretakers of the possessed statuette. This small relic finds its way into the hands of a student who gathers with his friends to contact a spirit using a Ouija board. An indigenous doll relic and a Ouija board, people? Too bad Witchboard (1986) wasn’t released yet to warn you. But has Trilogy of Terror (1975) taught you nothing!?!?!
After their weird Ouija experience, the students approach reporter Sandy (Suzy Stokey; Deep Space, The Tomb). One student seems to have been influenced by ‘the power’ of the relic and, yeah, now he’s basically evil. There’s really not much to this plot.
The head-squash death scene was not gory, but I respected and enjoyed the set up. And the early professor flagpole impalement death wasn’t bad either. Other than that, and a bunch of ho-hum Poltergeist-y shenanigans, essentially nothing happens in the first fifty-five minutes. The writing and acting are good enough, and the story is engaging. But just not enough is happening. At least, not until the demon in the doll possesses someone, who then takes on some snarling demonic latex aspects and bloodily mutilates himself a bit.
The film is well made for an 80s horror movie. However, the horror that is offered is too infrequent and never feels like enough when it’s happening. By far, the most (or only) satisfying horror scene is when the bad guy is defeated, with bloody lacerations all over his mutilated body. Still, even that scene is not good enough to justify that this movie is worth recommending—I warning I issue since I, myself, will often watch a movie on the basis of one awesome screen grab. The final scenes are cheeky, cheesy and fun. But still not worth it overall. There’s just too much “nothing” happening for too much of this movie.
Co-directors Stephen Carpenter and Jeffrey Obrow (who both did The Kindred and The Dorm that Dripped Blood) have done better. Not sure how this movie ended up so phoned-in and hollow.
Share this post:
The Movies, Films and Flix Podcast – Episode 541: The Hunt for Red October, Jack Ryan and Submarine Cinema
You can download or stream the pod on Apple Podcasts, Tune In, Podbean, or Spreaker (or wherever you listen to podcasts…..we’re almost everywhere).
If you get a chance please make sure to review, rate and share. You are awesome.
Mark and Norbert discuss the 1990 action thriller The Hunt for Red October. Directed by John McTiernan and starring Sean Connery, Alec Baldwin, Sam Neill, James Earl Jones, and a few strategic pings, the movie focuses on what happens when an intelligence analyst meets a submarine captain. In this episode, they also talk about submarine cinema, Jack Ryan, and countermeasures. Enjoy!
If you are a fan of the podcast, make sure to send in some random listener questions (we love random questions). We thank you for listening, and hope you enjoy the episode!
You can download the pod on Apple Podcasts, Tune In, Podbean, or Spreaker.
Share this post:
John’s Horror Corner: The Last Days on Mars (2013), an acceptable Sci-Horror about the perils of exploration to Mars.
MY CALL: Good enough, entertaining enough, but nothing great. However, truth be told, there are much better Sci-Horror space and Mars exploration movies. MORE MOVIES LIKE The Last Days on Mars: Red Planet (2000), Mission to Mars (2000), Apollo 18 (2011), Europa Report (2013) and Moonfall (2022) tell similar cautionary tales of space exploration.
As it turns out, another MFF’er (does that sound derogatory?) reviewed this film when it was released. See Mark’s review by CLICKING HERE.
Director Ruairi Robinson’s only feature film opens splendidly with gorgeous cinematography of arid Martian landscapes, happy go lucky 50s music, and routine space chores undertaken at the start of a massive dust storm on the very last day of their six-month mission.
The cast includes Liev Schreiber (The Omen, Sphere, Phantoms, Scream 2-3), Elias Koteas (Fallen, Let Me In, Dream House, The Prophecy, The Fourth Kind, Skinwalkers), Olivia Williams (The Sixth Sense, Below), Romola Garai, Johnny Harris (Monsters: Dark Continent, Black Death, The Cottage), Goran Kostic (Children of Men), Tom Cullen (Invasion, Black Mirror) and Yusra Warsama (Castle Rock) among others.
The team has not been as productive as they’d hoped, producing no useful samples to bring home. But on the last day, a member of the crew comes across evidence of bacterial life… on Mars! This discovery comes paired with tragedy as a crewman is lost, falling down a seismic fissure while collecting his final sample. Remember what happened when they found extraterrestrial bacteria in Species (1995)? Or the virus or whatever it was in The Thing (1982)? Or the first sign of Life (2017) on Mars? Yeah, these things never turn out well.
Suffice to say, a crewmember wanders back to base camp after being infected with something and becoming, for lack of a better word, a murderous bacterial zombie (not unlike the geologist in Prometheus). The infected hiss and growl like 28 Days Later (2002) rage zombies, and use tools and weapons to murderous ends just as readily… and they even solve complex problems. So, highly intelligent rage zombies despite having no pulse and, thus, evident brain death. The closest comparison might actually be the fungal zombies from The Last of Us (2023-ongoing). The uninfected crew fend off the infected as we circle towards a rather familiar ending scene in these infection-based thrillers.
We don’t wander anywhere near the Sci-Horror-ness of Life (2017), Event Horizon (1997), Prometheus (2012), Virus (1999) or Moontrap (1989). In that sense, this movie is more Sci-Horror-LITE. But it is still violent Sci-Horror, for sure.
This is all stuff we’ve seen before. But it’s very executed well. Is this to be some highly recommended Sci-Horror? Not really. Red Planet (2000) and Mission to Mars (2000) are both more entertaining, present more engaging problems, and the losses hit you with emotional gravity. But I definitely wouldn’t be steering anyone away from this either. Solid cast, nice shots, decent effects… this was a perfectly enjoyable, even if not so exciting, one-time watch.
Share this post:
John’s Horror Corner: The Game (1984; aka The Cold), an incredibly boring movie about how sick 80s millionaires entertain themselves.
MY CALL: This ranks among the most boring horror I’ve endured. MORE MOVIES LIKE The Game: Much better movies to watch about deadly games instead include Red Room (1999), Would You Rather (2012), Cheap Thrills (2013) or Truth or Dare (2018).
Gathered together in a mansion by three bored eccentric millionaires, nine people compete in ‘The Game’ for one million dollars. To win this game, the players must not leave the mansion as they face their greatest fears. While the game transpires, the wealthy game-runners are watching remotely and communicating by intercom.
The presence of a creeping mist implies that weird things are about to happen. And most nefarious goings on seem to be accompanied by the presence of a weirdo who looks like a hunchbacked Gru. Both of these elements are resolved with dumb twist-revelations in the end.
The gags endured by the players of The Game include sudden cold temperatures, a shark in the swimming pool, displaying a hanged contestant on TV, a woman is attacked by a vomiting rubber demon puppet, and some forced Russian roulette. But despite the attempts at diversity, all of the effects are of the lowest possible phoned-in quality, and somehow even worse execution. The acting and writing are likewise excruciating. This is awful. Like, truly destitute. I’m ranking this waaaay at the bottom dregs with Boardinghouse (1982). And to quote that review: “I’ve written nearly 1000 reviews for this website. And this, truly and honestly, may very well be the most devastatingly boring thing I’ve watched and reviewed. Spare yourselves. Avoid this at all costs.” Well, now I’m beyond 1200 reviews and those sentiments now apply to The Game just the same. We could probably lump Fatal Exam (1988) in there for good measure.
The filmmaking is pretty clunky at every level. When someone is swimming laps in a pool, the sound editing/mixing produces the sounds of lightly splashing water in a sink or bathtub. The sound just doesn’t match what we’re watching and it’s uncomfortably noticeable. And when our wealthy masterminds wander the hotel, they play almost comedic Vaudeville-esque piano tunes. This music shouldn’t exist in this movie, which is not at all a horror comedy.
Everything about this movie is horrible. Director Bill Rebane (The Demons of Ludlow, The Alpha Incident, Invasion from Inner Earth, Rana) has put together a real stinker for us here. It may be fun to mock among friends. But there is nothing inherently fun about this movie, not even in a “bad movie” way, by its own merits. Just bad.
Share this post:
John’s Horror Corner: Waxwork II: Lost in Time (1992), an even more wild and equally delightful sequel.
MY CALL: This sequel is much less horror and more of an anthology-esque mix of Sci-Fi, fantasy and horror with moderate to hokey doses of comedy and loads of great effects. It’s silly and light, but still a bloody movie that’s a lot of fun while continuing to embrace its predecessor’s 80s-ness in the best ways. MORE MOVIES LIKE Waxwork II: Well obviously you should have already seen the first Waxwork (1988) movie, and perhaps even The Wax Mask (1997).
Director and writer Anthony Hickox (Waxwork, Warlock 2, Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth) picks up this sequel by extending the very scene which ended Waxwork (1988)—including some footage of the wacky violent finale. As the museum burns down, an animated severed hand scrambles across the lawn, following Mark (Zach Galligan; Waxwork, Warlock 2, Hatchet 3, Gremlins 1-2) and Sarah (Monika Schnarre; Warlock 2) home for some bloody Evil Dead 2-inspired evil crawling hand shenanigans.
Fearfully anticipating that the evil of the waxwork would not be vanquished (before the finale events of part 1), Sir Wilfred (Patrick Macnee; The Howling, Transformations) leaves Mark videotaped advice from the grave. Now having inherited Wilfred’s collection of supernatural antiquities, Mark selects a time-traveling amulet in his quest to find proof of the evils of the waxwork.
Many of the wax exhibits hinted in part 1 went unexplored. This sequel time portals us to Victor Frankenstein (Martin Kemp; Embrace of the Vampire) and his monster, alien lifeforms in the parasitic theme of Aliens (1986), and King Arthur to name a few. I must say, the Lampooned Alien-themed segment was an absolute delight with Sarah assuming the obviously hoked-up Ellen Ripley role. The big-headed rubber monster suit is awesome, some iconic scenes and deaths were homaged, and the larval tentacle monster attack scene was outstandingly slimy and gross. There are also distinct homages to Dawn of the Dead (1978), Nosferatu (1922, 1979) and many more, as this sequel clearly tasked itself with having an even more wild finale than part 1.
Unlike part 1, there are no wax exhibits of murderers and monsters to haplessly “enter”. But Mark’s amulet opens portals to times and places (that may have never existed in our dimension at all). But just like part 1, these separate portaled-in vignettes give the movie an anthology-ish feel as our time travelers assume pre-existing roles in these fantastic alternate dimensional spaces.
Among his time traveling adventures, Mark meets his supernatural investigator father (Bruce Campbell; Escape from LA, Moontrap, Black Friday, The Evil Dead, Evil Dead 2), a woman turns into a werepanther of sorts (you read that correctly) and later splatters a victim’s head, we catch a glimpse of Drew Barrymore (Scream, Cat’s Eye) as a vampire victim, and the same finale big bad evil guy (Alexander Godunov) as Die Hard (1988)!
The blood, gore and effects honor the promises of part 1 with eye-popping, brain launching, neck-stretching, head-smooshing, space helmet-imploding, squirmy alien-regurgitating, and other bloody antics. And all is done in the same humorous-to-hokey fashion as part 1.
Overall, this sequel is much less horror and more a mix of Sci-Fi, fantasy and horror with moderate to hokey doses of comedy. This is a fun, light, but still bloody movie that’s a lot of fun and continues to embrace all that was good from 80s horror.
Share this post:
The Movies Films and Flix Podcast – Episode 540: Dragonslayer, Cranky Dragons, and Hot Lakes
You can download or stream the pod on Apple Podcasts, Tune In, Podbean, or Spreaker (or wherever you listen to podcasts…..we’re almost everywhere).
If you get a chance please make sure to review, rate and share. You are awesome.
Mark and Adam Hodgins (of the GoFigure show on YouTube) discuss the 1981 fantasy film Dragonslayer. Directed by Matthew Robbins, and starring Caitlin Clarke, Peter MacNicol, Ralph Richardson and a cranky dragon, the movie focuses on what happens when a young wizard thinks he can defeat a powerful dragon. In this episode, they also talk about practical effects, 1980’s fantasy movies, and being the last of something.
If you are a fan of the podcast, make sure to send in some random listener questions (we love random questions). We thank you for listening, and hope you enjoy the episode!
You can download the pod on Apple Podcasts, Tune In, Podbean, or Spreaker.
Share this post:
MFF Data – Audiences and Critics Love Cold Stallone
While working on an assignment last year I was reminded that 1993 was a massive year for Sylvester Stallone. After several years of flops (Rocky V, Oscar, Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot), Stallone needed a hit and they came in the form of Cliffhanger and Demolition Man. The critically respected action films pulled in over $400 million worldwide and gave Stallone’s career a much needed boost. These movies don’t have much in common (aside from being awesome), but they do feature Stallone in some very cold situations. In Demolition Man, he’s sentenced to decades inside an ice cube, and in Cliffhanger he battles John Lithgow atop the Rocky Mountains. This got me thinking about other Stallone movies and I started noticing a pattern. Between Rocky, First Blood, Rocky II, Rocky IV, Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 and The Expendables 2, his “Cold Stallone” films do well with critics and audiences when he’s in a cold location, or frozen inside an ice prison. Also, his love of fur coats inspired Ryan Gosling’s Ken character in Barbie. Good things happen when Stallone is cold.
Here are some examples:
- Expendables 2 – When he meets JCVD’s character for the first time, it’s cold outside. This is the only time in the franchise when Sly seems chilly, and it’s the highest rated film in the franchise.
- Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 – He’s introduced on an ice planet.
- Creed – Super cold – Sly’s highest-rated movie on Rotten Tomatoes
- First Blood – Super cold – Highest-rated Rambo movie
- Rocky IV – He goes to Russia and trains in the snow. It’s the highest grossing movie in the Rocky franchise.
- Creed and Rocky – He’s been nominated for three Academy Awards for his work in Rocky and Creed. Very cold.
I wanted to see if this assumption held up so I rewatched most of his films (I already knew he was super cold in Cliffhanger, Rocky 4, and Demolition Man) and lumped them into three categories
- Not Cold or Chilly – There are no instances in which he seems chilly
- Chilly – It’s not freezing outside, but it’s still cold. For instance, In Cobra, a character says “It’s getting cold out here, huh? Yeah. Better get inside..”
- Cold – In Creed II while he’s sitting by Adrian’s grave he rubs his hands together and blows warm air into them. Dude is cold. He doesn’t have to be cold for the entire film, he just needs to be really cold at least once.
Here are some quick overall stats for Stallone’s career
- Average Worldwide Box Office – $149 million
- Average Tomatometer Score – 44%
- Average IMDb User Score – 6.06
Box Office
- Cold – $193 million
- Chilly – $93 million
- Hot – $130 million
Tomatometer
- Cold – 63%
- Chilly – 38%
- Hot – 35%
IMDb
- Cold – 6.78
- Chilly – 5.98
- Hot – 5.725
Conclusion – Cold Stallone (plus a good script, direction, editing and solid supporting characters) is the best Stallone!
Take a look at this timeline and you’ll notice that Stallone is at his best (for the most part) when he’s cold.
Here’s a quick timeline to further solidify this dumb data.
- 1976 – Rocky – Cold
- 1979 – Rocky II – Cold – Huge hit – Elevated him further into A-list territory
- 1982 – First Blood – Cold – Excellent action film
- 1985 – Rocky IV – Cold – Highest grossing Rocky movie
- 1985 – 1993 – He had some big hits, but nothing huge or critically adored
- 1993 – Cold – Career Comeback – Demolition Man and Cliffhanger
- 1993 – 2006 – Had a few cool films like Copland and Daylight, but it wasn’t great
- 2006 – Cold – Rocky Balboa – It was smart going back to Rocky, and it was very smart to make him cold again.
- 2006 – 2012 – solid run, but nothing Oscar worthy or Rocky IV huge.
- 2012 – The Expendables 2 – Chilly (not cold) – $312 million worldwide. Only chilly Expendables movie and it made bank and has a Fresh Tomatometer score.
- 2016 – Cold – Creed – Huge hit and he got an Oscar nominated
- 2017 – Cold – Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. II – Highest grossing film (unadjusted for inflation)
- 2018 – Cold – Creed II – Gross over $200 million and is one of his highest rated films
Here’s a breakdown of his stats so you can check them out. Sure, some of the Cold Stallone movies are soul crushing, but on average, it’s best to go with Cold Stallone.
If you’re bored and want to listen to some podcast episodes about Sylvester Stallone movies, On my Movies, Films and Flix podcast (you can find it anywhere), I’ve talked about Rocky 4 (Episode 526) – Driven (Episode 271), and Cliffhanger (Final Fights episode 32).
Share this post:
MY CALL: Some blood, weak death scenes, no actual gore, and nothing scary. Still, solid characters and story (even if highly and obviously derivative) made this an experience I did not regret. I’m not recommending it. But I’m impressed with what was accomplished with little FX budget and a genuine care for at least passable writing in a genre starved for anything more than throwaway characters and often topless victims. MORE MOVIES LIKE Sorority House Massacre: For more sorority horror, try Black Christmas (1974), The House on Sorority Row (1982), The Initiation (1984), Sorority House Massacre II (1990), Black Christmas (2006) and Happy Death Day (2017). However, I’d skip the remakes of Sorority Row (2009) and Black Christmas (2006).
Giving her account from a hospital bed, Beth (Angela O’Neill; Grandmother’s House, Alien Nation) explains her recent stay at a sorority house that ended in mass murder. Her arrival was admonished by a trio of NOES-ish young girls during a surreal, mildly bloody nightmare. Then, by day, she has waking visions of a man with a knife interdimensionally stabbing at her. It seems that director Carol Frank is sampling some Freddy Kruegerisms. Meanwhile, in a nearby mental hospital, a male patient becomes rambunctious. He lives in a perpetual half-sleep state and has visions of Beth! Oh, boy. Yet another 80s slasher with a psychic link.
Our mental patient escapes from the hospital, steals a knife and a car, and heads to the sorority house which was once his house where he killed his entire family except for his little sister (spoiler alert, it’s Beth!)… in a manner that in no way smacks really hard of Michael Myers’ return to Haddonfield. And returning to the NOES connection, Beth awakens with a bloody knife wound that occurred during one of her visions. Yeah, Frank’s influences are pretty obvious.
The nudity is present, but not so salacious. I mean, it’s abundant but it never feels so dirty as typical horror nudity. Plus, as an equal opportunist movie, we see a guy scrambling and running from the killer totally buck naked as well. It’s refreshingly amusing seeing a naked dude sprint in sneakers and nothing else.
Our silent killer picks off the sorority girls and their boyfriends one by one in generally boring fashion. None of the death scenes are worthy of mention. I was annoyed by their simplicity and clearly budget-challenged execution.
This was director Carol Frank’s (The Slumber Party Massacre) second 80s slasher pitting a male slasher against a bunch of cute coeds. But despite the generally goreless, very weak death scenes, this movie was somewhat entertaining. The characters were likable and far above the typical slasher fodder, and the story—though blatantly highly derivative—actually worked. Not going out of my way to recommend this. But it’s not bad.
Movies, Films & Flix 