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Bullet to the Head As Told by Pictures

January 26, 2013

Hello all. Mark here.

Sylvester Stallone is back and he is bringing an axe to a gun fight. Bullet to the Head looks like a mixture of old school meets new school. Director Walter Will (The Warriors, 48 Hrs) is back and this time he has likable actors Jason Momoa, Sarah Shahi and Sung Kang with him. The main buzz around this film is Stallone’s chiseled physique and a surprise axe fight. It is nice to have an non-CGI action fest that delivers the bang.

I’ve been looking at the pictures and I’ve been able to piece together the story. I’ve done zero research, watched the trailer once and am pretty certain I’ve figured out the plot.

Here are the pictures. Enjoy the thrills, quips and strategic triceps posing.

The poster features a plethora of likable actors. However, for a movie called Bullet to the Head it features some misses to the head.

Bullet to the head movie postervia

Sylvester Stallone is a hit man that shoots people in a very specific area.

Bullet to the head rifle


He takes off his shirt and shoots more people in a very specific area.

Bullet to the head Stallone muscles


A bad guy shoots his partner in an area above the shoulders

Bullet to the head Jason Momoa gun


Sly shoots himself metaphorically. Audience groans.

Bullet to the head mirror


Stallone gets a new partner and Kung Fu jokes abound. Watch the trailer. I don’t remember what he said but there are comments like that.

Bullet to the head sung kang suit


The new partner falls for Sly’s daughter and a montage of tattoos, piercings and regretting those tattoos and piercings occur.

Bullet to the head Sung Kang


The partner and daughter get kidnapped and to find them Sly gives Slater a cutting shear to the head.

Bullet to the head Christain Slater


Sly locates bad guys warehouse…..Axe fight! But, first Sly has to stretch.

Bullet to the head Axe fight preparation


The axe fight involves unnecessary twirling, lots of grunting and triceps flexing.

Bullet to the head axe fight


Sly starts to lose because he can’t think of the name of the Game of Thrones character the guy he is fighting looks like.

Bullet to the head axe fight 1


Sung Kang shoots the mercanary in an obvious spot. People complain title is too literal.

Bullet to the head Sung Kang gun


Bad guy somehow survives the bullet and Stallone uses an unnecessarily large amount of C4 to blow him up. One-liners occur.

Bullet to the head one liner and explosion


Enjoy the axe fights and one-liners!

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