Jack the Giant Slayer as Told by Pictures
I am pretty certain what will happen in Jack the Giant Slayer. There will be beans, beanstalks, angry giants and slayed giants. There will be a smathering of CGI while a well quaffed Ewan McGregor uses his Star Wars training to stab some tall men.
Collider visited the set and released some promotional pictures for the CGI fest. I looked at the pictures and the plot unfolded before my eyes. The film is directed by X-Men and Superman maestro Bryan Singer so it has a chance to be a fun and loud time. The film has been delayed for over a year and was once titled Jack the Giant Killer. We shall see if the delays and tweaking will make it better or louder. I will undoubtedly watch the film but I feel like the surprise will be gone now that I’ve conquered the plot.
A wide eyed kid will find some beans, drop the beans and and look very surprised
There will be a climbing scene where after 45 minutes he realizes he has only climbed 20 feet. I wonder how somebody could climb a miles high beanstalk and not be tired
Meanwhile, Ewan McGregor introduces us to the world of the faux-hawk and fabulous shoulder pads.
The kid reaches the top of the stalk and the scenery looks like somebody sneezed a bunch of CGI and got lucky.
Somehow the kid tricks a giant and it falls down the beanstalk and does a belly flop into the ground
Peasants gather and they annoy me. The biggest problem I have with these kinds of films are the extras.
The giants get angry and Fe-Fi-Fo-Fum I see the head of a peasant popping
While giants are popping heads the kid finds a spunky love interest.
The giants gather and prove they can pose in cool looking positions. Also, the main giants hair looks like he saw a picture of Walton Goggin’s hairstyle in Justified and decided to copy it.
Ewan McGregor once again proves he has awesome hair.
The giants gather in a huge CGI blob and plan on smooshing some puny humans.
The humans line up against the giants in what will prove to be a very bad idea. Who thinks they can withstand giants charging? They tried it in Wrath of the Titans and it proved to be incredibly dumb.
A huge battle happens and everybody becomes friends. In the pic below the crew is smiling at all the giants and their new found love of faux-hawks.
There you have it! Zero research. Watched a trailer once. Probably correct. I can’t wait to watch this film and appreciate the CGI and peasant smooshing.
fffff
Movies, Films & Flix 
You really make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this topic
to be really something which I think I would never
understand. It seems too complex and extremely broad for me.
I am looking forward for your next post, I will try to get the hang of
it!