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Five Fake Horror Films I Want To Watch

January 15, 2016

What is better than a horror film? A fake horror film! What I love about the fake horror films that inhabit horror films is they leave a lot to your imagination. For instance, I really want to see the Wes Craven movie about a monkey killer in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.

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In movies like The Final Girls, Scream 2 and Grindhouse we are shown glimpses of horror films that might actually be good. A great example of a fake horror film I want to see is Jaws 19. How is that shark still plaguing that poor family? These fake films raise more questions than answers and I really want to see them!

Here are five fake horror films I really want to see.

Jaws 19 – Back to the Future 2

Jaws is my favorite film and I would love to see the 19th installment. I recently broke down the plots of Jaws 5-18 and I think 19 could be one of the best. I’m pretty sure it revolves around an underwater city being attacked by Jaws and that is awesome! The tagline says “This time it’s really really personal” so we know we are in for some great revenge carnage. I appreciate that the Brody and Jaws clans are basically the Hatfields and McCoys of the cinematic world.

Jaws 19

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Camp Bloodbath – The Final Girls 

After watching The Final Girls I’d love to see Camp Bloodbath in a packed theater. It seems like perfect horror fodder that is good enough to be fun and bad enough to be a cult classic. I think what most impresses me is that it tried to be a good movie that turned out very cheesy. I love when directors and writers try to create something good and end up failing. That means the movie will have character and be a lot of fun.  Creating a good/fake movie is damn near impossible and I think The Final Girls creators pulled it off.

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Stab – Scream 2, 3 & 4

I love the Scream movies and consider Scream 2 to be the perfect horror sequel. So, I’d love to see these fake movies based on a movie. I think the best part would be watching Parker Posey run around as Gale Weathers. I loved Posey and Courtney Cox together in Scream 3 and I think Posey would nail the role.

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Squid Lake and The Perfect Horror Film – Movies, Films and Flix

We’ve recorded over 40 podcasts and our most popular episode is called “Crossbow and Tentacles.” It is a bonkers thing full of crossbows, jam shops and boat chases. The bad guy is a sea beast who wears overalls and is lethal with a crossbow. The good guy’s name is Mason Jar and it all gets crazy and hilarious. Listen to the podcast and you will love hearing a horror film built from scratch.

Also, if you are into totally fictional oral histories you will love Squid Lake. Squid Lake tells the age old story of a guy battling a squid somewhere around Lake Michigan. I got together with the Sharkdropper guys and we recorded quite possible the weirdest podcast ever. It gets crazy and fun. You will want to watch this movie.

squid lake

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Don’t – Grindhouse

Edgar Wright (Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz) has proven himself adept at making horror comedies and I’d love to see what he could do with this weird film. It basically realizes that every decision in a horror movie is bad and it plays with that trope. I think Edgar Wright would be the perfect choice for a self-aware horror film and I think he needs to make it….now…..please.

 

 

 

 

 

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