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The Top Five Cinematic Locations You Should Avoid

February 2, 2019

I recently wrote a piece about the blood bath rave in Blade and it got me thinking about terrible cinematic places I wouldn’t want to be. So, I went through my favorite movies and picked five places that would be a nightmare to either call home or visit. I can 100% guarantee you wouldn’t want to be anywhere near these places.

Let us know what locations you wouldn’t want to visit in the comments.

1. The Slaughterhouse Club – Blade

If a person you don’t know invites you to a rave at an undisclosed location don’t go. What might seem fun in the short term, could turn out to be a living nightmare as jerky vampires laugh at you while blood pours from the ceiling. You would never find me at one of these places, and if was unlucky enough to be there, I’d be hoping a random vampire slayer shows up and saves the day.

Run away!

2. The Further – Insidious 

Everything in The Further seems terrifying, and I guarantee the majority of the things in the place want to kill you. All the inhabitants are dangerous and between the Red Lipstick Demon, The Man Who Can’t Breath and Key Face there is zero chance of making it out of the place alive — or with your sanity intact. In you are in The Further it means that something terrible has happened, and you had no choice but to willingly travel into the worst place on earth. No thanks.

Elise is a gangster

3. Standing above the Great Pit of Carkoon Which is Home to the Sarlacc  – Star Wars: Episode VI – Return of the Jedi

According to C-3P0 and Wookiepedia, the Sarlacc monster digests things over very long periods of time. I’d hate to fall into the thing and slowly digest inside of it. Also, how terrible would it be to have the walk the plank into its mouth? I can’t think of a more terrible death (aside from being eaten by the Rancor).

Gross.

4. New York City – The Marvel Cinematic Universe

Between alien attacks, crime kingpins and a deluge of super villains, the New York City inside the MCU world seems like the most dangerous place on earth. It never gets a reprieve and attacks by maniacal villains are always around the corner (or through a portal). The best case scenario is you live in Hell’s Kitchen and have to deal with Daredevil battling Kingpin or some lower level crime boss who isn’t interested in wiping out blocks of innocent people. The worst that can happen in the Daredevil world is your apartment building is slightly damaged or your car gets dented when somebody falls on it. Also, I really hope somebody renews Daredevil.

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5. A House Full of Lions – Roar

Roar took 11 years to film and 70 crew members were injured in the process. It was originally supposed to be about the preservation of African wildlife but it soon took on a life of its own. The movie rambles along at lightning speed and basically focuses on a family having a terrible time in Africa. Shooting with the lions was crazy and people suffered lacerations, bone fractures, scalping and gangrene. It is considered to the most dangerous movie ever made and producer/writer/director Noel Marshall was lucky that he was able to cast his two sons John and Jerry, his wife Tippi Hedren (The Birds) and her daughter Melanie Griffith. In an interview with the New York Post John Marshall had this to say about his dad:

“Dad was a f–king a–hole to do that to his family,”

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Where would you avoid? Let us know in the comments.

 

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. John Leavengood permalink
    February 2, 2019 2:50 pm

    I LOVE this article (it’s right up there with cinematic trees I wouldn’t want in my front yard) and would like to be the first to patiently request a part 2 of this article.

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