The Expendables: Extended Director’s Cut

If you have not watched The Expendables here is a brief synopsis:

“A bunch of badass good guys kill South American bad guys with very big guns, knives and biceps.”

The budget for The Expendables was $80 million. Other films like Sherlock 2, Transformers and X-Men: First Class had budgets of around $200 million. Thus, Stallone wasn’t able to entirely capture the vision he wanted due to time and money constraints. The theatrical cut made a lot of money but he had to edit a lot out in order to appease the studios and his investors.

The extended cut is the film that Stallone intended. He added in ten more minutes that flesh out the characters and their back stories. The director’s cut has been out for a while and I really wanted to see it. However, I own the original Blu-ray so I didn’t want to buy the new version. Luckily, I was able to rent it on my PS3.

I dug the majority of the added scenes. Dolph Lundgren gets the best treatment of the bunch. The new cut has him talking about being a Viking. There is a scene where he wants to hang a pirate and says “it is a Viking tradition.” Also, when Dolph gets shot there is a great bit of dialogue between he and Stallone that made the rental worth it. Here it is:

Dolph: “I want a viking funeral.”

Stallone: “What? Like we put you in a boat and light you on fire?”

Dolph: “That’s right.”

Stallone “You are not a viking.”

Dolph: “So what, who cares?”

Later Stallone is telling Statham about the viking funeral and how he wants his ashes spread in the ocean. Statham quips “That will poison about 1,000 miles……actually, more like a million miles.”

Dolph + Viking Funeral = Money well spent.

Jet Li talks more about how he needs money. I love the scenes where he tries to get more cash. He talks about his kids..yet he doesn’t have kids. He says he is little and has to do more work..thus, more cash. I loved that he is a shady little guy that must have a gambling problem.

Randy Couture talks more about his cauliflower ear. Terry Crews talks about his kids and Stallone and Statham get to bicker longer. I’m happy Stallone didn’t add any more of Rourke’s heavy breathing monologue.

The biggest problem is the love story between Jason Statham and Charisma Carpenter. It all stems from her dating the biggest turd in recent film history .The guy is a poorly realized meathead that is there so Jason can beat him up.

The Nu-metal in the film hurts the soul as well. It seems like he couldn’t afford Metallica so he got a Metallica cover band who also writes original music.

If you liked The Expendables you will like this. It provides no new revelations but you do get to hear Dolph talking about Vikings.