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Bad Movie Tuesday: The Best of the Worst Sequels Tournament

September 4, 2012

Hello all. Mark here.

Over the past couple weeks Grantland has been figuring out what the greatest sequel of all time is. They’ve narrowed it down to Godfather II and The Empire Strikes Back. I am aware of the greatness of these films but it all seems too easy. I’ve decided to figure out what is the best of the worst. Bad sequels are commonplace in our society. They are bigger, louder and dumber then their predecessors. However, many of them have become guilty pleasures. I love The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor. It has 13% on Rotten Tomatoes and features Mario Bello with a shaky British accent. The first time I watched the film I was annoyed but after a random subsequent viewing I was hooked. The movie has a place in my collection and in my heart. Is it a good movie? No. Is it a movie that features a puking yak, strategic yetis and a fly fishing gag? Yes.

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I’ve decided to pit Godfather III, Alien Resurrection, Indiana Jones 4 and Blade Trinity against each other in a 32 sequel tournament.  There are positives to be found amidst the befuddling sequels. For instance, there are yetis in Mummy 3, Trinity has the longest death EVER in Matrix: Revolutions and a woman spears Jaws great grandson with a boat in Jaws: The Revenge.

This tournament will celebrate the bad decisions that producers/directors/writers made that destroyed quality series and annoyed viewers. The next four Bad Movie Tuesdays will feature the thrilling journey towards bad sequel history as we vote on the greatest of the bad.

READER NOTICE: I’ve left out the Star Wars prequels due to the prequel aspect. I’ve also stayed away from horror movies sequels because they are always bad and I did not want to make a list featuring 700 movies.

So comment on the blog, post on Facebook or send smoke signals and I will add up the votes. Vote, comment and tell me why Batman and Robin is the greatest of the bad sequels.

This week vote for movies moving into the second round. 32 will become 16. Here is how I decided to vote.

Indiana Jones 4 – Vince Vaughn and his hip hop style were no match for the nuked fridge and Shia swinging with the monkeys.

Jurassic Park 3 – The whole movie is about velociraptors trying to get their eggs back. Also, the actors didn’t mope around during press duties like the Spider Man 3 cast.

Wrath of the Titans – Teen Wolf 2 was soul crushing but it didn’t feature a general telling his men to “hold the line” while a mile high lava god stood in front of them. What line was there to hold? The sentence summed up the glorious dumb this movie featured.

AVP: Requiem: I still don’t understand how they screwed up Aliens vs. Predators.

Here are the rest of my choices. Godfather 3, Batman and Robin, Blade: Trinity, Mummy 3, Jaws: The Revenge, Alien Resurrection, X-Men 3, Speed 2, Matrix: Revolutions, Superman 3, Basic Instinct 2, Grease 2

12 Comments leave one →
  1. Don permalink
    September 4, 2012 12:43 pm

    Not sure how I decided a couple of them. For instance, a Speed sequel where they are on a cruise ship or a Pirates of the Caribbean movie I don’t even remember hearing about. Also, Mark…Jeez. Not sure how one can have ‘subsequent’ viewings of The Mummy Emperor Dragon movie and enjoy it unironically. That represents about as much culture as Larry the Cable Guy.

    • September 4, 2012 1:00 pm

      I did see it in South Korea with soju vision because the Larry The Cable Guy movie was sold out. I like the film despite all of its foibles. It is complete non-pretentious fluff featuring strategic yetis. I love it.

  2. johnleavengood permalink
    September 4, 2012 3:19 pm

    Some super tough calls in there. And, hey! I loved Blair Witch 2: Book of Shadows!

    • September 4, 2012 3:27 pm

      I agree. I feel the same about Mummy 3. I just see why everyone thinks it is a bad film. I really hope Jaws: The Revenge takes the win. It is the only movie where somebody steers a sailboat into a shark.

  3. Eric permalink
    September 6, 2012 10:09 pm

    I have to say I liked blair witch 2 more than the first

    • September 6, 2012 10:28 pm

      There was a lot of love for Blair Witch 2. im surprised it lost to AVPR

  4. johnleavengood permalink
    September 8, 2012 7:03 pm

    I enjoyed Blair Witch 2 a lot, way more than part one. AVPR was “really fun” though awful. I still feel jipped.

Trackbacks

  1. Bad Movie Tuesday: The Best of the Worst Sequels Round 2 « Movies, Films & Flix
  2. Bad Movie Tuesday: The Best of the Worst Sequels: Round 3 « Movies, Films & Flix
  3. Bad Movie Tuesday: The Best Worst Sequels Round 4 « Movies, Films & Flix
  4. Bad Movie Tuesday: The Best of the Worst; Round 5 « Movies, Films & Flix
  5. Bad Movie Tuesday: The Best Worst Sequel « Movies, Films & Flix

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