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The 2015 Random Awards: Honoring the Fake Mustaches, Groovy Dancing and Subplots About Buying a Television

December 24, 2015

Hello all. Mark here.

2015 was loaded with many glorious and random cinematic moments. Whether it be Oscar Issac busting a move in Ex-Machina or Julie Walters crushing the dinner table talk in Brooklyn there were many surprises. We here at MFF love randomness and I’ve been trying to bring the world something different with these awards. The random awards celebrate all the things that you might not remember (Kurt Russell drinking Belgian beer in Furious 7). They stem from observations, little moments and things I think are weird (all things Jupiter Ascending). The post was fun putting together and hopefully you enjoy the randomness!

The following post awards all that is random in 2015.

Kylo Ren has defeated helmet hair award

Kylo Ren’s hair is unfazed by that pesky helmet. How does he do it?

Kylo Ren Star Wars

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Funniest Drama Award

Bridge of Spies is a very good film. I love how it blends humor with drama and you can tell the Coen brothers were involved.

Bridge of Spies hanks

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Best fur coat award

Ben Mendelsohn is my hero. I feel like the fur coat he wore in Slow West just formed around him one day.

Ben Mend Slow West Jacket

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Domhnall Gleeson is crushing it right now award

Between Brooklyn, Ex-Machina, Star Wars and The Revenant Gleeson is on a tear!

Brooklyn Domhnall Gleeson

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Best erotic dance performed by a vampire award

What We Do in the Shadows is the best vampire mockumentary ever made. You will love this movie.

What we do in the shadows dance

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Did Charlize Theron really cut her arm off in Mad Max: Fury Road award

The CGI is incredible in Mad Max. I love how it aided the practical effects.

Sidenote: I know she didn’t cut off her arm…..or did she?

600px-MadMaxFuryRoad-SKS-Furiosa-TRAILER

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Thank you for not wasting the Dalmore 62 award

I applaud you Sam Jackson for not wasting the tasty beverage in Kingsman.

Dalmore Kingsman

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Least safe sea beast enclosure ever award

Why would anybody sit in the front rows at Jurassic World? How much does this thing eat? Why feed it great whites? Can it swim right up to the that beach? Jurassic World is really bad.

640_jurassic_world_embed1

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In 120 minutes you fit in eight air battles, one wedding, three rescues, 80 outfit changes, egg selling, Lizard henchmen, TV purchases, three dinners, bureaucracy, bounty hunters, double crosses,  imprisonment, space orgies (10 seconds of footage, It took eight hours to film),  bee attacks, toilet cleaning, almost space death, roller skating, expository dialogue (X8), wing growth and a whole lot more award.

I love Jupiter Ascending. It may be total gobbledygook but I love it.

Jupiter Ascending Mila Kunis dress

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Most uncomfortable moment involving a bath tub award

Creep is a very good movie. The bathtub scene with Mark Duplass with hurt your soul.

Creep Bathtub scene

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Best usage of fake films in a really good film award

Me and Earl and the Dying Girl is a very good film. I loved the 42 fake films and the posters are pretty great.

Me and Earl fake movie posters

 

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Best dancing by a brilliant author award

The End of the Tour is a beautiful film. You need to watch it. Jason Segel is incredible as David Foster Wallace.

The end of the tour

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The best bear attack that doesn’t happen in The Revenant award

Backcountry will punch you in the gut because you like the bear fodder.

Missy Peregrym Backcountry

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Best usage of Belgian beer

Kurt Russell is my hero. Furious 7 is #4 on the all-time worldwide box-office list. It is because of Kurt Russell (I have no proof to backup this claim).  The guy is so good he knew Dominic would want Corona so he had a six pack waiting on ice.

Kurt Russell belgian beer fast 7

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My favorite movie of the year award

I have nothing pithy to say about Love & Mercy. It is a fantastic film that is loaded with solid performances and great music. Viva la Pet Sounds! 

Love and Mercy Paul Dano

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Best single line that describes an entire movie award

David Koechner calls his dog a “useless turd” in Krampus. Those words sum up the movie for me.

Krampus David Koechner

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I tried to explain your plot the other day and it ended up with two very confused people award

Predestination is a very good film. Just don’t try to break down the plot for your friends.

Predestination Snook bar

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Best usage of a possessed teenager kicking off her leg casts (Think Kickboxer) and then walking on broken legs while crunching noises abound with each step. 

Insidious 3 and Lin Shaye were very good. I normally dislike horror prequels and was pleasantly surprised when it turned out to be glorious (check out the pod for it here). You will love the crunchy leg scene.

Insidious 3 leg kicks

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Best standing around in a barren landscape award

If you are going to stand around in the middle of nowhere you better look ridiculously good like the people in Spectre.

Spectre lea Seydoux

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Best reaction to being drugged award

What does Napoleon Solo do when he is drugged in The Man From U.N.C.L.E.? He gets comfy on a couch and awaits unconsciousness.

The Man From Uncle Suit

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Best real mustache award

Kurt Russell is my spirit animal. Hateful Eight uses his mustache skills perfectly.

Hateful eight Kurt Russell mustache

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Best fake mustache and wig award

Jason Statham was pure gold in Spy. You need to see it.

Jason Statham Spy mustache

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Best usage of sassy Irish women award

What I like about Brooklyn is that everybody feels three-dimensional. I would pay to watch the dinner scenes again.

Brooklyn dinner scene

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You do you, James Spader…..award

Even when Spader plays an evil robot in Avengers: Age of Ultron he still tilts his head. Spader keeps it real.

James Spader Ultron

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John Leguizamo is the best and needs to be in more movies award

He has minimal screen time in American Ultra but Leguizamo still manages to steal the show. Put him in more movies!

Jonh Leguizamo American Ultra

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 Best usage of potatoes award

I’ve never cheered for potatoes more. Their nourishment saved our favorite martian. The Martian is the crowd pleaser of 2015.

The Martian Potatoes.

 

Best dancing by a megalomanic billionaire award

Oscar Issac dancing in Ex-Machina is a perfect example of a beautifully random moment.

Ex-Machina Dance gif

 

Movie that I thought would never work, but did award

The Last Witch Hunter built a new world and was incredibly geeky. I love that Vin is trying to bring the world something new. The movie may not totally work but you gotta appreciate something original.

Vin Diesel sword the last witch hunter

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If you love the Before trilogy and squishy noises you will love this movie award

Spring is like Before Sunrise met Species and spawned a sweet and romantic horror film.

Spring movie

 

 

 

 

 

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