180° South
Movies, Films & Flix rating: C+/B-
Next time you’re looking to stream a movie on Netflix, check out the worthwhile documentary 180° South. It’s a bit preachy and unfocused, but overall it’s a sincere and reasonably thought-provoking little flick with incredible scenery.
The doc follows a surfing and climbing bum named Jeff Johnson as he tries to retrace a 1968 journey by his heroes Yvon Chouinard and Doug Tompkins, the founders of the famous activewear companies Patagonia and North Face, respectively. Apparently, these guys bought a cheap VW bus and drove and surfed all the way from California to Southern Chile and then did some great rock climbing.
The first part of the flick is an aimless travelogue as Jeff travels to meet up with Chouinard and Tompkins in Patagonia, which is where the film begins to redeem itself. If it accomplishes anything, this doc does a solid job of exploring the meaning of the word “adventure.”
Some interesting quotes:
“The word ‘adventure’ has gotten overused. For me adventure is when everything goes wrong. That’s when adventure starts.”
-Chouinard
“The best journeys answer questions that in the beginning you didn’t even think to ask.”
-Johnson
“Surfing and climbing are both useless sports. You get to be conquistadors of the useless. You climb to the summit and there is nothing there. You could hike to the top from another direction. It’s how you get there that is the important part.”
-Chouinard
The doc subjects its audience to environmental proselytizing and too many old-timer anecdotes. But I think we’re prone to criticize because we’re secretly jealous that we’re not out there doing the same. I say enjoy the scenery and begin planning your next adventure.
Share this post:
The Thing (2011)
By John Leavengood
MY CALL: This was a solidly entertaining, effects-driven sci-fi thriller/action movie. I’ll certainly buy it on Blu-Ray. But don’t think for a moment that it compares to the original. When I try not to compare it to the original, I give it a B/B-. I won’t lie, though. While entertained, I was disappointed. WHAT TO WATCH INSTEAD: Please do not dare watch this until you’ve seen the original first. FIRST! I don’t care if this is a prequel. The 1982 version still holds up strongly and Kurt Russell and the old gang deliver what no one in this new installment can. IF YOU LIKE THIS, WATCH: Duh, the 1982 The Thing every night forever. Kurt Russell for President 2012! TRAILER: click here.
We’ll start by ignoring the AMAZING quality of the 1982 predecessor.
This new movie was very entertaining and I really enjoyed the effects. The Thing’s “thing” was reminiscent of a monster from the Resident Evil movies—in a good way. It was fast, anime-tendril-rich, polymorphic, voracious and disgusting, all delivered with a CGI report card of straight A’s. Fans of the macabre will adore the transformation scenes. The big flaw was that I couldn’t have cared less about the characters. I mean, Warrior’s Joel Edgerton should be easy to root for, and the director clearly tried to make him a Kurt Russell MacReady clone, yet I didn’t even care if he lived. I think the problem was that there was not enough nerve-wracking suspense and the dialogue was uncompelling. The suspense makes me wonder what will happen to you. The quality of your lines decides whether or not I care what happens to you.
It may have been a prequel, but it masquerades as a remake. The characters have different names, but many of them look stunningly similar to their doppelganger-counterparts in the original and even find themselves in scenes that are obviously modeled, honestly more blatantly remade, from the original.
I don’t mean to go all Jekyll and Hyde on you, but now let’s shift gears and bask in our beautiful memories of the original. It didn’t rely on action. It was suspense-driven. When action did show its face the transformations were slow and horrific; difficult to watch for some, much like the transformations in An American Werewolf in London and In the Company of Wolves. I can’t help but to wonder if the simplicity of CGI monster-action led to the director simply drop the ball on the suspense and terror. I really never had that classic The Thing mood for the new one. Even the scene where they try to “test” who’s infected lacks intensity. When I watch the original, I feel it! Remakes and prequels don’t have to match the style of the original, but they should bring something to the table to make it its own—like the switch from the suspense-driven Alien to the action-driven Aliens, very different, but they nailed it with each respective style. This prequel didn’t nail it. The effects were fun and Fangoria probably got a good article out of it, but don’t see this movie because you loved the original. See it because you want to see the latest CGI-action sci-fi flick.
The most unfortunate thing about 2011’s The Thing was that this movie, as a prequel, ruins the 1982 sequel for anyone who hasn’t seen it yet. So many of the scenes use 1982’s playbook that you may immediately recognize them. These two movies are meant to show us what happened at two different sites with two different sets of characters. Yet, were it not for the last scene of the prequel and the first scene of the original/sequel, you’d never know this wasn’t just a modern reimagining.
Look, I give this a solid thumbs up for the price of admission. But every thumb in the room down when compared to the 1982 The Thing.
Share this post:
Bad Movie Tuesday: Case 39
Or as it is known in Canada: This film sat on the shelf for four years before it was released.
I dislike movies about evil kids. They all bother me. Whether it be The Ring, The Grudge, 27 Dresses or Orphan. The kids come out of televisions and crawl all funky. They don’t scare me. I remember one late night while watching an evil kid ghost movie I boasted to my beleaguered friends that “I could punch a ghost in the face.” I know it is impossible to punch a ghost but it shows that evil demon kids have no effect on me.
The little demon in this movie just wants you to buy her ice cream and if not she will kill one of your friends. So, you are not stuck with a brutal demon. You are stuck with an immature demon who is too lazy to get her own ice cream. Also, if you slightly annoy her your friends are dead. Demons from other movies will hurt you for no reason because they are evil. The Omen and Exorcist are classics because what is inside them is evil beyond evil. Thus, they need to be stopped. You can’t babysit these demons and they will never ask for ice cream.
Sidenote: If the demon from The Exorcist asks for ice cream….the ice cream will end up in your face.
Case 39 revolves around Renee Zellweger taking an evil kid in her custody. Why did she have to take the girl into custody? The girl’s parents tried to put her in an oven. Naturally, the parents are caught in the act and Ian McShane breaks a dudes jaw in easily 17 places.
Then you get all the clichés of clichés.
1 .The girl is a little weird at first.
2. She gets weirder, then she convinces a kid to kill his family.
3. She summons bees to kill a bearded Bradley Cooper in the longest bee death scene in the history of the world.
4. Renee discovers that the girls parents had massive dead bolts on the inside of their bedroom door. At this point she begins to wonder if they love privacy or don’t want their evil kid coming in at night.
4. Renee gets hip to the little demons behavior which include bad acting, stealing and reading minds.
5. There is a big song and dance number.
6. The end.
Sidenote: one of these things did not happen. However, it would have been a welcome change of pace.
It seems like demons in most movies just like to slam doors, swing from chandeliers, and make your television lose reception. Do they not have anything else to do? Can they really invest twenty years of their life annoying children? Wouldn’t it get boring?
Case 39 is an odd little flick. Boring and funny in all the wrong places. The greatest praise I can give this film is that I did not fall asleep while watching. I have fallen asleep during countless horror films. It is odd that I am fully alert during dialogue heavy projects like Downton Abbey but fall asleep during most horror films. I fell asleep while watching both of the new Texas Chainsaw Massacre flicks.
Bad Joke Time: I was sawing logs while Leatherface was sawing up people…..HEY OOOOOHHH!!!!!
Don’t watch this movie. Watch Paranormal Activity or Ernest Scared Stupid (Scariest movie ever).
Share this post:
Scream 4
By John Leavengood
MY CALL: So much money and preparation went into this that you would hope it practically had to be at least watchable. The producers succeeded…and then some. It may be a very different experience from the original of this slasher satire franchise, but it’s a very worthy sequel. [B+] IF YOU LIKE THIS, WATCH: Hopefully you saw Scream 1-3 before diving into this one. FYI: I’m here for you folks who waited for the DVD release. The Hof (aka Mark) reviewed this when it was fresh in theaters. Here’s his review.
It’s charming that they start these movies so similarly. It presents a bit of welcomed nostalgia reminding me of how wonderful my original Scream experience was. With cameos by Anna Paquin (HBO’s True Blood) and Kristin Bell (TV’s Heroes, Forgetting Sarah Marshall), this installment playfully pokes fun at the franchise letting us know that, hopefully, it hasn’t taken itself too seriously.
In addition to the returning cast we have a new set of youngsters, some of which are clear replacements for other Scream characters (e.g., the young Jaime Kennedy-style kid). The younger cast comprises our main persons of interest. I enjoyed the new age, Youtube-y A/V metageeks. Alison Brie (TV’s Community) and Hayden Panetierre (TV’s Heroes) offer some solid personality. Two new cops, Adam Brody (Thank You for Smoking, Jennifer’s Body) and Anthony Anderson (Transformers, Hustle and Flow), give us some nice comic relief as well.
Much of this movie is composed of the same cookie cutter scenes and metamovie-survival-guide dialogue common to all of the previous Scream movies. But this is par for the course with these movies and, well honestly, they recycle this material effectively. Just like the others, the “rules change” again and, also like the others, I never had a clue who the killer (or killers) would be.
If you try not to compare this too much the prequels, this makes for a fun ride. I approve. See it.
Share this post:
Never Back Down 2: The Beatdown
By John Leavengood
MY CALL: If you’re here for the fights, you’ll be disappointed! Another dud of a fighting flick. So sad. [C-] WHAT TO WATCH INSTEAD: Blood and Bone and Undisputed 2. These movies have what you came for and deliver it with grade “A” Michael Jai White quality. Also, maybe try an older one like The Best of the Best.
This was directed by Michael Jai White. Now I think he’s awesome—at action and choreography. Check him out in Undisputed 2 or Blood and Bone. These titles may sound suspect, but trust me, the action is box office “A” quality. It’s just all of the non-combat that kept them from theatrical release. But again, keep in mind the director of this one and try to be understanding of the hardly serviceable acting. You’re here for the fights…and you’re going to be disappointed.
So some fresh meat freshman boxer-wrestlers stumble across the same underground tournament as the first installment in this hopefully coming-to-a-close franchise. The characters are completely uninteresting. The plot is completely aimless. Michael Jai White delivers completely painful dialogue. But I won’t lie. I smiled a couple of times.
The score and tone are surprisingly upbeat considering this movie is about a brutal elimination competition called “The Beatdown”. But the training scenes lack the proper motivating energy, the trainer (Michael Jai White) doesn’t rile us or the characters up, and I cannot find an antagonist. At least, not besides a needlessly racist cop scene. As the movie progresses, we find no more intriguing conflict than that between the apparent protagonists and the fighting/training scenes remain stagnant. An attempt is made to turn one protagonist into a villain—it’s a very poor attempt.
The characters don’t seem to develop. They don’t seem to have anything to overcome. There doesn’t seem to be any point to this movie. Not even to watch some cool fights. There’s one (here’s the clip). But is it really worth over an hour of suffering for two minutes of pleasure? The Beatdown fights at the end are “okay” but fall short of the price of admission.
Share this post:
50/50
Joseph Gordon-Levitt is one of my favorite actors. The guy has range. Whether it be Brick, Inception, 500 Days of Summer or 50/50 you know the guy will bring something unique to the screen.
What makes this film work are the personal details that writer Will Reiser includes. This is not a film about big moments. It is about the small details that lead you through the chemotherapy, emotional stages and eventual surgery. Reiser survived cancer and that is why the film feels honest. The emotions are not hokey and the humor is injected at all the right moments.
50/50 revolves around a healthy 27-year-old man who is diagnosed with spinal cancer and given a %50 chance of surviving.
Helping him get through the highs and lows is Seth Rogen. Rogen is loud in this film but not too loud. He provides a counter balance to Gordon-Levitt’s subdued character.
Anna Kendrick is reliably nice as an out of her league psychiatrist. I’ve never not liked Kendrick. She is able to be naive and intelligent at the same time.
Rounding out the cast is Angelica Huston as the worrying mom and Bryce Dallas Howard as his girlfriend/faux artist that will most certainly cheat on him later.
The only tiny issue I have with the film is that some of the scenes do not flow well into the other scenes. It has a bit of an episodic feel to it that jars but rarely hinders the flow.
Watch this movie. It handles cancer in a mature way yet is able to create a healthy dose of laughs.
Share this post:
October Horror Movie Preview
Hello all. Mark here.
With Halloween approaching I wanted to preview all of the horror flicks coming out this month. The list includes a prequel, sequel, threequel and two indies. Enjoy. Let me know if you watch any of them.
The film I anticipate the most is The Thing. I like Mary Elizabeth Winstead (Scott Pilgrim) and Joel Edgerton (Warrior, Animal Kingdom). I also like that they are not remaking a classic. They are building a history around The Thing. However, prequels are rarely good. Remember The Phantom Menace. Also, when you try to build a history for a horror villain it can blow up in your face. The new Halloween, Nightmare on Elm Street and Eat Pray Love are examples.
I remain optimistic about this film. I want to love it. I hope it doesn’t tarnish the good name of a horror classic and disappoint the immortal Kurt Russel.
Martha Marcy May Marlene was this years darling at Sundance. It is not a horror flick but since it is described as a psychological thriller I thought I’d include it on the list. I’m going to watch it. I’m always stoked for some indie unsettling internal horror flicks.
Retreat. Cillian Murphy and Thandie Newton live alone on an island. Jamie Bell washes ashore and terrorizes the couple. Eventually, they get involved in a crazy fight for survival. I like Murphy, Newton and Bell a lot. Can’t wait to watch.
Paranormal Activity 3. The reviews are solid so far and it will be fun to watch with an audience. However, the platform is starting to feel old. I respect the first film for the competent/economical handling of a unique idea. As much as I complain about these films I will watch them and probably jump out of my seat.
The Human Centipede 2 looks like the dirtiest film ever made. It will most likely be violent, gratuitous and horrible. I am going to stay as far away as possible. Please do not watch this. I can’t see any possible scenario that it will be enjoyable.
.
Share this post:
John’s Horror Corner: Prom Night (2008)
Hello all. Mark here.
I fell asleep while watching this movie. I don’t remember a thing about it. That is why I’m glad John wrote a review.
I’ve actually fallen asleep during most of the recent remakes. I fell asleep in the theater during the new Texas Chainsaw Massacre. I passed out on my couch while watching Shutter, Black Christmas, Sorority Row and the new Nightmare on Elm Street.
SIDENOTE: If you fall asleep during a movie about being terrorized in your dreams it doesn’t say much about the film.
By John Leavengood
MY CALL: If this is a remake of the 1980 Jamie Lee Curtis flick, I can’t tell. The only similarity is the title. This is a slasher flick where slashes don’t seem to draw blood. You be the judge. Could anything really be good about this? Maybe an “F” is too harsh, yet a “D” seems generous. WHAT TO WATCH INSTEAD: Well, Sorority Row was way better than this. Not only better, but decently fun period.
Remember That Thing You Do? Wasn’t everyone great? Tom Hanks, Tom Everett Scott, Steve Zahn, Liv Tyler, and oh yeah, Jonathan Schaech (also from Quarantine, The Forsaken, Hush). What happened to him? Not much good since that movie.
Brittany Snow (the then 22-year-old star) plays a high school senior—who totally strikes me as someone who could get a full ride to Brown University, right—decides not to take her meds leading up to prom night. Why? So that everything would be clear. Why the drugs? Because she was crazy-stalked by Jonathan Schaech, who was imprisoned but escaped three days before prom night.
The preview suggested that this killer would be a terrifying mystery as promiscuous teens get picked off one by one. Not the case. We are informed way too early of Schaech’s character. Each kill is harbingered by blatant smoke signals far before any suspense could be cultivated and, not surprisingly, there are no frightfully jumpy surprises. There is no suspense, shock-value, blood (except for maybe one kill) or development whatsoever. If the director was trying to accomplish anything with this movie, I have no clue what it was.
This really bored me. Just look at Schaech (below)–uncompelling.
Share this post:
Bad Movie Tuesday: Retrograde
Hello all. Mark here.
Instead of writing a traditional review I’ve decided to tell the story of Retrograde through the eyes of an unlucky scientist.
It is 2204 and you are sitting in the front yard of your post-apocalyptic research lab. You look up and you see a cardboard spaceship falling from the sky. The ship lands and you think you are about to meet intelligent aliens or an advanced race of blue Amazonian women. The spaceship door opens and smoke pours out. Something from inside moves and out walks Dolph Lundgren wearing the greatest leather jacket ever.
You begin to ponder several things. The world is a wasteland, how did Dolph find a sweet leather jacket? Also, you remember the film The God’s Must Be Crazy. In the film a Coke bottle falls from the sky and turns a tribal village upside down. You wish a bottle of Coke would have fallen from the sky.
Why would you rather have a delicious beverage? Because, whenever Dolph is in a direct to DVD film it always involves plagues, evil guys, violence, twenty year old women and more violence.
Dolph gets off the plane and mutters something about how his plane crashed and his crew became belligerent and committed mutiny. Also, he says that his plane was sent back in time to prevent a plague. He says that he and his crew are immune to the fungus but you might be in trouble.
A few minutes later you wonder where your twenty year old daughter is at.
It is too late to talk sense to your daughter because she is so impressed by the feathered hair Swedish guy wearing a sweet jacket.
A huge laser fight breaks out and wrecks all of your research. Eventually, Dolph defeats them all with front kicks, judo chops and bad dialogue. However, you did get shot in the arm. You look for your wife but she is nowhere to be found.
In the end your daughter, wife and sister-in-law run off with Dolph, the world is saved and your space bunker has been severely damaged by laser blasts.
The End!
Share this post:
The King of Fighters (2010)
Hello all. Mark here.
The King of Fighters sounds really bad. However, after John’s review I want to watch it. I dig bad fighting movies based on video games. They always make me laugh.
By John Leavengood
MY CALL: It’s The Sorcerer’s Apprentice meets a wannabe Mortal Kombat and Ray Parks goes all “precious”-craving Gollum. I’d skip it. [C] WHAT TO WATCH INSTEAD: I mention several other movies in this review. All of them, including Balls of Fury, have better action than this. IF YOU LIKE THIS, WATCH: If this did it for you then you’re probably younger and more interested in the girls’ outfits than the violence. So I’d direct you to something like DOA. Maybe check out Tekken, as well.
DISCLAIMER: This is based on a video game that I have never heard of. However, I love any seriously done tournament-style martial arts movie. Just forgive me if I ignore statements as to whether or not certain game characters were done justice.
So, as I was saying, this is about some non-lethal tournament in which the fighters get summoned—with all of the notice of a 911 page to a doctor on call—to an alternate dimension for battle. The fighters beam into this Matrix-y alternate dimension by way of some Bluetooth-like earpiece which is fueled by three ancient artifacts (owned by three different clans). Legend has it that if one man was to possess all three that he could be granted limitless power. So naturally they are displayed in the open air behind no protective barriers at some fund-raiser with minimal floor security and the first guy who comes along (Rugal, played by Ray Parks) succeeds in a kind of smash-and-grab job often delegated to dim-witted street thugs. Rugal then changes the tournament into a more deadly game to serve his dreams of tyranny…or something. His ambitions really aren’t clear.
The combat is nothing awesome, but serviceable and occasionally filmed decently enough such that the viewer can see what’s going on in the fight. There are even a few impressive acrobatic moments—but they by no means redeem this movie or make it rent-worthy. The set design of the combat dimension is not terribly innovative, which is a shame because that’s what gives a movie like this its flavor. But the overall production value is good, the acting is reduced by overly simplistic dialogue (no shock there), and I doubt I’ll regret watching this.
Ray Parks (The Phantom Menace, Ecks vs Sever) and the always lovely Maggie Q (Live Free of Die Hard, MI:III, Balls of Fury) are horribly underutilized. In fact, it’s a shame they didn’t do the action direction and choreography themselves. I imagine they were upset when they saw their fight scenes for the first time. The finale is some terrible mach-up of The Sorcerer’s Apprentice and later installments of the Mortal Kombat movie franchise.
An Anime-haired Sean Faris (Never Back Down), a Maggie Q shower scene, a very PG lesbian locker room scene, and the women’s wardrobe suggests that this was made for teenagers who would sooner rent this on a Friday night rather than going out and actually talking to real live girls.
Here’s a trailer with some actor/director interview commentary.
Movies, Films & Flix 