Skip to content

John’s Horror Corner: Smothered (2014), an honest, campy, bad, fun horror comedy featuring murder by breast smothering.

June 15, 2014

movie poster

MY CALL: This film doesn’t masquerade as anything it isn’t. It’s honest, campy, bad, fun…and breasty. MOVIES LIKE Smothered: While tasteless and much more raunchy, I’d consider films like The Killer Eye (1999), Breeders (1986), Chillerama (2011), Head of the Family (1996) and Hideous! (1997) for a combination of boobs, gore and giggles.

Golden Eye‘sXenia Onatopp gave viewers an unexpected sexual thrill when she killed a man with a leg scissorhold mid-coitus. And that was just PG-13. John Schneider has stepped it up a notch and brought us a big-breasted temptress who commits mammary-assisted murder! That’s right. She smothers people to death with her breasts.

Probably inspired by recent news of the near death of a suffocating German lawyer to his amply-endowed girlfriend and the trailer park murder of a redneck who was “boobed” to death by his plus-sized wife, it seems that fatal breast smothering has become something of a new fad and John Schneider has playfully capitalized on this gimmick in bringing us Smothered.

Smothered-2014-Trailer_mp4__0010-300x180

In this horror comedy, we find Kane Hodder (Chillerama, Hatchet, Wishmaster), R. A. Mihailoff (Hatchet II, Texas Chainsaw Massacre III: Leatherface), Don Shanks (I’ll Always Know What You Did Last Summer, Urban Legends: Bloody Mary) and Bill Mosely (The Devil’s Rejects, Texas Chainsaw 3D) play themselves for the most part at a Louisiana horror convention.

smothered_movie2

A glimpse into the horror con scene.

Smothered_Official_Cast_PhotoJRS2small

The cast is accompanied by a few others including Trixie (Shanna Forrestall; The Last Exorcism, Feral) and the murderess DeeDee (Brea Grant; Halloween II, Dexter, Heroes)…aptly named given her ummmmm virtues.

Brea Grant in 'Smothered'

Embittered with a weak turnout in autograph sales (largely due to a cameo by John Schneider stealing the show), Kane accepts a gig to “haunt” a trailer park as Jason Voorhees. So he recruits his fellow unpopular horror icon friends to help him with this task. Upon arriving to the site of the RV park, they start dying one by one under strange accidental circumstances…and, of course given the title, a few breast smotherings for the sake of comedic T’n’A.

smothered_movie3

What’s odd is that the title and the opening breasticide set a standard that the rest of the movie doesn’t at all follow. We’d expect several more breasty assaults picking off our victims–making the title and opening scene more of a marketing strategy than a premise. Of course, a bunch of smothering cleavage murders would result in about zero gore and that obviously would leave the audience wanting more. That said, this film remained entertaining in a deliberately goofy way and those femme fatale weapons do enough appearances to rile up randy viewers. I had a lot of fun watching this cheeky horror comedy and the occasional non-breast-based murder turned out to be most welcome.

smothered_movie1

R. A. Mihailoff awkwardly attempting to be scary and Leatherface-y to scare the locals.

There were some solid efforts in the gore department. Some of the more fun gory scenes involve a razor wire snare trap producing some floppy flesh-rending gore, someone self-mutilating themselves to death basically by accident, and a slapstick “face peel” scene followed by an improvised first aid treatment that had me howling. Another effect I was especially fond of was the CGI ants–they actually looked kind of cute in one of the scenes.

Screen-Shot-2013-12-16-at-11_32_38-AM

This film was written and directed by John Schneider. Yes, the very same John Schneider you knew as Bo (The Dukes of Hazard) and Jonathan Kent (Smallville)! I guess his more recent work in Snow Beast, Return of the Killer Shrews and Super Shark give him a taste of playfully “bad” horror. I’m glad he’s taken this step in his career. I was certainly entertained.

john-schneider_s-smothered_scruberthumbnail_0

This film doesn’t masquerade as anything it isn’t. It’s honest, campy, bad and fun.

Advertisements
13 Comments leave one →
  1. davecrewe permalink
    June 15, 2014 10:56 pm

    Big boobs and horror are a time-honoured convention, so why not combine the two! I’ll have to hunt this down, nice review.

    • johnleavengood permalink
      June 16, 2014 1:18 pm

      Please do. But it’s not yet available. You can find SmotheredMovie on Twitter or follow JohnSchneider for more info as it becomes available. I think Schneider is pushing to get a limited theatrical release (genre-specializing theaters). I went to a by-invitation password-protected preview site to watch the movie.

Trackbacks

  1. John’s Horror Corner INDEX: a list of all my horror reviews by movie release date | Movies, Films & Flix
  2. Love in the Time of Monsters (2014), a horror comedy filled with chest-bursting zombie squirrels, mutant rage zombies dressed as bigfoot, and delightfully deliberate stupidity. | Movies, Films & Flix
  3. John’s Horror Corner: Love in the Time of Monsters (2014), a horror comedy filled with chest-bursting zombie squirrels, mutant rage zombies dressed as bigfoot, and delightfully deliberate stupidity. | Movies, Films & Flix
  4. Short Film Buzz: Kickstarter Campaign for Scythe (2016) has just one day left and $7000 to go. If this is going to happen people NEED TO PLEDGE NOW! | Movies, Films & Flix
  5. John’s Horror Corner: Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse (2015), just loads of awesome raunchy gory fun! | Movies, Films & Flix
  6. John’s Horror Corner: Ava’s Possessions (2015), humorously addressing what happens “after” an exorcism…like support groups and warrants. | Movies, Films & Flix
  7. John’s Horror Corner: Deathgasm (2015), the New Zealand horror comedy where Ash vs the Evil Dead brilliantly meets Scout’s Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse. | Movies, Films & Flix
  8. John’s Horror Corner: Zoombies (2016), a low budget zombedy using the Jurassic World playbook. | Movies, Films & Flix
  9. John’s Horror Corner: Pumpkinhead II: Blood Wings (1993), a decent B-movie creature feature sequel that pales to the original. | Movies, Films & Flix
  10. John’s Horror Corner: Shallow Water (2017), Independent Short Film Review. | Movies, Films & Flix
  11. John’s Horror Corner: Tethered (2017), Independent Short Film Review. | Movies, Films & Flix

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: