John’s Horror Corner: 31 (2016), Rob Zombie’s least impressive film, but that Nazi dwarf was great!
MY CALL: If a gun was to Rob Zombie’s head and he had to make a Grindhouse film in under a month, this is LESS than I’d expect from him. It’s his only film that I specifically dislike, and as a big fan of his, I didn’t enjoy writing this review. MORE MOVIES LIKE 31: The Devil’s Rejects (2005) and House of 1000 Corpses (2003) fall right in line with 31. Lords of Salem (2013) for a major change in pace and artistic approach. Halloween (2007) and Halloween II (2009) for more of his brutal filmmaking.
During a 1970s nostalgically scored road trip montage, we meet Charly (Sheri Moon Zombie; House of 1000 Corpses, Lords of Salem, Halloween), Roscoe (Jeff Daniel Phillips; Freaks of Nature, Halloween II), Panda (Lawrence-Hilton Jacobs; The Annihilators, Alien Nation), Venus (Meg Foster; Jeepers Creepers III, They Live, Leviathan, Stepfather II, Lords of Salem) and Levon (Kevin Jackson; 3 From Hell). Uplifting music and imagery embracing close friendships reveal the care Rob Zombie took in introducing us to these victims. Unfortunately, our care of the characters basically stops there.
The five of them are kidnapped and face the Victorian theatrics Father Murder (Malcolm McDowell; Halloween I-II, Antiviral), who explains the rules of his homicidal game of survival “31.” If they can survive 12 hours, they are free. But trying to kill them are a sassy Nazi dwarf (Pancho Moler; American Horror Story, 3 From Hell), a laughable pair of chainsaw clowns and other white-faced killers, all introduced to us in similar over-the-top fashion as hunters of The Running Man (1987). The game’s playing field is a huge factory rigged with locked gates and electric barriers to herd and control their movement in favor of the killers.
This film is a lot of things, none of which include a conquest in acting or writing. And whereas I rather enjoyed Zombie’s approach to Halloween I-II (2007, 2009), 31 feels more like a movie that was made for the sake of making a modern grindhouse flick in a short period of time on a drunk dare.
In reference to this shallow filmmaking, fellow MFF writer and Rotten Tomatoes writer Mark Hofmeyer wrote “31 is Rob Zombie going full “Rob Zombie” and turning everything to 11. He came up with the idea in a few seconds and the 20-day production schedule felt rushed and unnecessary. Nothing is fleshed out (except the exploding flesh) and it feels like a study in style over substance.” To read Mark’s full review, CLICK HERE.
The strongest elements of the film would be the set design and the evil Nazi dwarf character (easily the best and most “appropriately” over-the-top performance of the film), who had the best line delivery and acting by far. That murderous little man chewed the scenery and I want to see more of that actor. My greatest disappointment was how flat the brutality was delivered. Zombie has a natural gift for pushing his audiences with cruel brutality, but here I somehow just never cared (about the victims or the killers or the dire circumstances). Sure, the chainsaw clown fight had good energy. But the killers were so dumb, ill-written and uninspired I was just waiting for them to be dead and done.
In summary, and as a Rob Zombie Rob Zombie (Lords of Salem, House of 1000 Corpses, Halloween I-II) film fan, this is the first of Zombie’s films I can say I didn’t enjoy. It’s not simply my least favorite, it’s just not good and it even failed to scratch my itch for mean gory death scenes since I was never invested. I have trouble believing Zombie himself was invested—there was no heart in this (or, to be fair to Zombie, I just didn’t feel it). Were it not for Pancho Moler, this would have been a complete waste of time for me.
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John’s Horror Corner: Mirror Mirror (1990), an incredibly boring evil mirror movie about high school temptations.
MY CALL: A boring, uneventful movie misfiring the concepts that would later be much better presented in Wishmaster (1997) and The Craft (1996). Just go watch them instead. MOVIES LIKE Mirror Mirror: For more evil mirror movies try Oculus (2014) or Mirrors (2008). But I’d maybe skip Mirror (2014), even though it’s way better than Mirror Mirror. And let’s definitely avoid the three sequels (1994, 1995, 2000) to this movie. Yes, three!
Opening scenes in horror movies offer a chance for filmmakers and special effects artists to tease our horrific taste buds with a sort of amuse-bouche in the form of a gory death scene, transformation scene or creature effect. More often than not, it will stand out as one of the best scenes of the entire film. Disappointingly to the contrary, this movie opens with the kind of mostly off-screen death scene that you’d hope wouldn’t set such a standard (but it does), as it fit the low budget random and incomprehensible style oft-encountered in less-inspired horror.
Decades after a woman murders another, Susan Gordon (Karen Black; House of 1000 Corpses, Night Angel, It’s Alive III, Burnt Offerings) and her high school daughter Megan (Rainbow Harvest) buy the house in which the vile deed was committed. The moment we see Megan and her mother, there’s nothing subtle of the Delia-Lydia Beetlejuice (1988) dynamic being copied. Meanwhile, an antique dealer (Yvonne De Carlo; American Gothic, Cellar Dweller) handling the estate of the previous homeowner snoops through an old diary for an exposition dump explaining the magical, evil and indestructible qualities of an old mirror left behind… which, naturally, caught Megan’s fancy. Apparently, the demon within the mirror acts like an evil genie, granting its possessor wishes as it influences them.
The supernatural events that follow are haphazardly executed at best. Megan is terrorized by a manifestation of her recently deceased father’s meltingly rotten corpse (among the better scenes of the movie, but I wasn’t exactly impressed). I wasn’t really feeling the tension or horror when a classmate stupidly suffered a bad bloody nose, when another nearly drowned, or when Megan’s teacher (Stephen Tobolowsky; Single White Female) suffered an asthma attack. And when Megan uses the power of the mirror to seduce a rival Mean Girl’s boyfriend and the demon within the mirror kills him, I was right then wishing I was watching almost anything else.
This movie’s idea of a death scene is having cheap FX clawed hands shake someone’s head while spraying fake blood over no latex wounds to be found. All of the death scenes are terrible, but the “least” bad is the blistering shower scene. But the “horror” aspects aren’t all that’s bad here. The writing is painfully dry, the acting is rigid, and even the movie’s greatest efforts to be interesting feel stale. It’s nowhere near “Girlfriend from Hell (1989) bad”, but it’s pretty boring.
I see no reason to recommend this to anyone for any reason—other than punishment. For what it was trying to accomplish, I’d recommend horror fans instead explore Wishmaster (1997) and The Craft (1996), the pair of which encapsulate so much better the concepts misfired in Mirror Mirror.
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The MFF Podcast #179: An Epic Peter Rabbit Discussion
You can download or stream the pod on Spotify, Itunes, Stitcher, Tune In, Podbean, or LISTEN TO THE POD ON SPREAKER
The MFF podcast is back, and this week we’re bringing you a massive episode about the 2018 film Peter Rabbit. This might be the most MFF podcast ever as we talk about talking pigs, rabbits with jackets, and saving an event centered around pottery. We also answer a lot of Peter Rabbit themed questions and put together an animated animals crew that get into some dark shenanigans. If you are a fan of Peter Rabbit and side discussions you will love this episode.
The CGI is legit.
If you are a fan of the podcast make sure to send in some random listener questions so we can do our best to not answer them correctly. We thank you for listening and hope you enjoy the pod!
You can download or stream the pod on Spotify, Itunes, Stitcher, Tune In, Podbean, or LISTEN TO THE POD ON SPREAKER
If you get a chance please make sure to review, rate and share. You are awesome!
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John’s Horror Corner: Overlord (2018), a high production value war movie mixed with a zombie movie.
MY CALL: The trailer didn’t lie—stunning production value on the level of many war film releases and loads of action. Highly entertaining and well made, but also completely unoriginal from any angle you view it. An excellent rental, but I wouldn’t recommend a purchase unless you’re a major zombie fan. MORE MOVIES LIKE Overlord: For more Nazi horror, go for Dead Snow (2009), Dead Snow 2 (2014), Green Room (2015), Yoga Hosers (2016), Manborg (2011), Hellboy (2004), Zombie Lake (1981), Oasis of the Zombies (1982), The Keep (1983), Frankenstein’s Army (2013), Puppet Master III: Toulon’s Revenge (1991), Puppet Master: The Legacy (2003), Puppet Master: Axis of Evil (2010), Puppet Master X: Axis Rising (2012) and Puppet Master: Axis Termination (2017).
This film kicks things off heavy and gritty with the kind of drama and shockingly abrupt action you’d find in Saving Private Ryan (1998) as a squad of American soldiers prepare for an ill-fated air drop. The gunplay and bullet-wound frenzies pepper scenes with blood red flesh wounds. If this film were to remain a war movie and introduce no horror at all, it would be a success on that alone. From the injuries to the concussive explosions, the special effects are excellent and will keep you engaged.
Among the few to survive the treacherous air drop, soldiers Tibbet (John Magaro; The Big Short, The Umbrella Academy), Boyce (Jovan Adepo; The Leftovers, Mother!), Ford (Wyatt Russell; Everybody Wants Some, We Are What We Are) and Chase (Iain De Caestecker; Agents of SHIELD) take shelter with a local French woman only to discover that the nearby German-occupied stronghold is serving as a Nazi experiment station to create unstoppable super soldiers.
The story takes its time revealing itself—not that anything complicated will unfold. We learn more about what’s going on from a cruel Nazi officer (Pilou Asbæk; Game of Thrones, Lucy) and our protagonists discover the Nazi’s latest medical advancements the hard way. In one scene they try to save a fellow soldier’s life with Nazi med-tech and, well… it gets a little weird and a lot awesome.
The latex wound work and monstrous mutation special effects are bone-protruding, skull-splatting and grotesque; a joy for any gorehound. In fact, the overall production value of this entire film is quite stunningly well done—even the acting. The laboratory scenes and set design are wonderfully elaborate, the “alchemical” approach to science is appropriately off-putting yet intricate, and the medical implements are painfully invasive.
This is essentially a more realistic approach to Frankenstein’s Army (2013) with a better budget, far superior acting, and still quite gory… it’s just not (quite) as ridiculous. These animated dead patients are nigh-unstoppable even to the classic notion of the zombie-halting headshot. They are spastic, in perpetual rage, and unnaturally strong. While highly entertaining this film stumbles the path of the super-strong villain literally throwing the good guys across the room (and providing them time and second chances) when he could just as easily kill them on the spot. As much as this annoys me, it was forgivable when considering all else the film offered in terms of explosions, gross gaping flesh wounds, super soldier zombie serum and manic action.
For his first horror film and only second feature film, director Julius Avery fared quite well! I strongly recommend a Netflix or rental viewing of this finely executed war-zombie movie.
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John’s Horror Corner: Cellar Dweller (1988), a surprisingly good B-movie creature feature in the spirit of Tales from the Crypt.
MY CALL: If you randomly pick out this movie, you’re in for better than you expected. Sure, it’s a B-movie. But more of a B+ movie boasting some cool scenes, catchy concepts, neat monster effects and even a dash of guilt-free in-context nudity (if ever there was such a thing). MOVIES LIKE Cellar Dweller: This movie’s somewhat mean yet fun-spiritedness in tone and execution reminds me of Creepshow (1982) and Tales from the Crypt (1989-1996).
From its very outset, this movie is trying really hard and I actually think it deserves some credit for its efforts. Certainly more credit than it’s been given over the decades, at least. After all, this is one of those films whose VHS cover art you might vaguely recognize from your 80s-90s video store era days—but you probably never rented it, right? But no one ever talks about it. Not even when this film opens with Jeffrey Combs (Would You Rather, Lurking Fear) illustrating strikingly detailed comic book panels which magically bring life in his art studio to a werebat/werewolf hulking menace terrorizing a young woman clad in little more than torn rags. Folks, this first scene is bonkers. It is actually really well executed, the monster looked great, and I never thought I’d say this, but the gratuitous nudity felt cheekily not at all out of place or forced since it was, well, exactly what he had illustrated. Finally, some guilt-free boobage!
For an 80s movie I never heard of, the special effects are pretty decent. The monster has articulation of the face and ears, it’s highly detailed (we see a LOT of it) and constantly drooling, and it’s a big full-body suit. You might be reminded of the giant ghoulie in Ghoulies II (1988), only this actually looks better.
Fast forward 30 years to present day and we meet comic book artist Whitney Taylor (Debrah Farentino; Earth 2), a fan of the late artist whose very illustrated creation caused his death decades prior. Whitney joins an artists’ colony and the film swiftly degenerates into the most typical 80s horror tropes—shallow characters, shaky story, critical discoveries made in old dusty basements, a shamefully gratuitous shower scene, and so on.
When Whitney wanders into the deceased artist’s cellar and recreates his monstrous artwork, she resurrects the fantastic demon who kills those she pens.
The gore is effective and quite ambitious for its budget. But this movie’s victory is in the creature costume and latex work. I love seeing its face with its blinking eyes and twitching ears as it eats a victim’s severed foot, tearing the flesh from the bone and the decapitation scene packs a gleeful momentary goriness. Meanwhile, the interplay between the comic strip panels and their murderous realization on-screen was more fun than I’d imagined.
Director John Carl Buechler (Friday the 13th Part VII, Ghoulies Go to College, Troll) and writer Don Mancini (Child’s Play 1-7, Channel Zero) team up to deliver this surprisingly fun yet schlocky B+ movie madness that borrows a bit from Sam Raimi with its shaky rushing-forward camerawork and an evil book called “Curses of the Ancient Dead.” The whole thing feels like a stretched-out episode of Tales from the Crypt, which is also the very twisted spirit in how it ends. This was such a pleasant surprise. Really!
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The MFF Podcast #178: The Frighteners
If you get a chance please make sure to review, rate and share. You are awesome!
The MFF podcast is back, and this week we’re talking about the 1996 cult classic The Frighteners. We love director Peter Jackson’s CGI extravaganza and appreciate how it effortlessly blends ghosts, wallpaper people, heart crunching, paranormal machine guns and the smashing of innocent lawn gnomes. We dig this movie so much we listened to the Blu-ray commentary and scoured all the extras (hours and hours of extras) to make sure this episode is dense with The Frighteners facts and trivia that will blow your mind. If you are a fan of The Frighteners you will love this episode.
If you are a fan of the podcast make sure to send in some random listener questions so we can do our best to not answer them correctly. We thank you for listening and hope you enjoy the pod!
You can download the pod on Itunes, Stitcher, Tune In, Podbean, or Spreaker.
If you get a chance please make sure to review, rate and share. You are awesome!
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John’s Horror Corner: It’s Alive (1974), setting the stage for the “baby horror” subgenre with a sprinkle of Frankenstein-ian allegory.
MY CALL: Overall this has little “horror” to offer in terms of jumps or gasps. However, this film offers the dawn of the “baby horror” subgenre and powerful heartfelt allegory of parenthood and classic Frankenstein (1931) that just might conjure tears. MOVIES LIKE It’s Alive: For more pregnancy/baby horror, try Rosemary’s Baby (1968), The Unborn (1991), The Unborn II (1994), Grace (2009), The Night Feeder (1988), the sequels to It’s Alive (1978, 1987), the remake of It’s Alive (2009), Inside (2016), Inside (2007), Still/Born (2017) and Good Manners (2017; As Boas Maneiras).
Lenore (Sharon Farrell; Arcade, Night of the Comet, The Premonition) and Frank Davis (John P. Ryan; Class of 1999, It Lives Again) are a couple as regular as they come, and they’re expecting their second child today… and he’s a big one. The birth scene itself is rather dramatic, but takes no gory liberties until after-the-fact when we find the entire operating room staff in bloody shambles.
Assigned to the case, Lt. Perkins (James Dixon; It Lives Again, The Stuff, Maniac Cop 1-2) advises Frank return home, leaving Lenore at the hospital to recover. Meanwhile their killer progeny is on the loose, luring prey by baby cries as dead bodies turn up around Los Angeles (with nearly all death occurring off-screen).
Emotionally disassociated from the child, the Frank signs the child’s body away to a Professor (Andrew Duggan; It Lives Again, A Return to Salem’s Lot, Frankenstein Island) for scientific study—if they can capture him, of course. Some interesting allegory links the parents to Dr. Frankenstein, the demonized creator of the confused and essentially newborn monster which killed when threatened to earn the monstrous label that matched its appearance.
Comments on the 2009 remake: The Josef Rusnak (The Thirteenth Floor) remake took some interesting liberties regarding the nature of the monstrous baby—for example, giving it a normal appearance with a transformative property (i.e., a weremonster of sorts). As such, the 2009 parents were able to take their monster-in-disguise home with only the mother the wiser to its true nature until the final act, brought about by a sort of mother-of-a-monster psychosis theme. Because 1974 treated the baby as an outright monster which escaped the operating room, it took a very different “monster on the loose” story trajectory in which everyone knows they’re dealing with a monster from the start. But the common elements are that the parents first considered abortion in one way or another (actually attempting and failing at it in 2009; but only getting a consultation in 1974). Is this then a cautionary tale warning against abortion? Perhaps—and if so, then in the same vein that The Unborn (1991) punished the mother for fertility treatments with a killer infant. But in 1974, the baby is treated as a monster in the form of disownment, never mistaking it as the actual child of the Frank or Lenore (until deep in the plot anyway); whereas in 2009 it is because of the mother’s psychosis that more victims are brought to suffer (including the father).
Larry Cohen’s (It Lives Again, Q, A Return to Salem’s Lot) 1974 classic is rated PG (well before the inception of PG-13), and I think I’m okay with that considering the moderate use of blood (with some well-deserved gory flair in the third act). There are only two on-screen kills (near the end) and, although it may not impress first-time viewers today, I’d say it was pretty good for 1974! The scare tactics are very basic (e.g., the unsubtle shaking bushes indicating a creature within), we see through our killer’s POV (much as in Black Christmas), and the baby itself is a fanged alien-like latex suit (and puppet, and prop) reminiscent of Bad Taste (1987) or Mac and Me (1988). Really, the only thing scary in this film is the premise, and none of the execution packs any impact until the emotional revelations in the finale. As it turns out, I thought the action-rich portion of the film was less interesting than the tight-chested allegory at its conclusion. Although there’s no comparison to the acting or premise, I’m reminded of the end of The Fly (1986).
This was clearly among the progenitors for monstrous “baby horror.” After the first 20-30 minutes—which I found compelling from a more dramatic perspective than horror or dread—the greatest scene this film has to offer is its last. It is here that the unintentional Dr. Frankenstein (Frank Davis) realizes his love for his abandoned unsightly creation, forgiving its sins as it was never welcomed into this world (nor even protected by its creators).
After a good start and a so-so-middle, this film closes strong. Highly recommended to fans of the classics and, have no fear, there are sequels! “Another one’s been born in Seattle.”
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10 Action Movies You Need to See Before You Watch Triple Threat
When Triple Threat is released on March 19th I’m going to be the first person in line (at my house) to buy the digital copy. I’ve been waiting to watch it for a long time, and I’m hoping it lives up to the hype that I’ve built up in my head. Why do I want to watch Triple Threat? It features Scott Adkins (Accident Man), Tony Jaa (The Protector), Michael Jai White (Black Dynamite), Iko Uwais (The Raid), Tiger Chen (Man of Tai Chi), Michael Bisping (xXx: Return of Xander Cage) and JeeJee Yanin (Chocolate) fighting each other!
It’s gonna be life changing.
In honor of Triple Threat, I decided to put together a list of movies you should watch before the March 19th release.
1. Accident Man (2018)
Accident Man is a very fun action-comedy that features legit brawls and Scott Adkins best performance yet. It helps that he adapted the screenplay from a popular comic book and brought in other big names like Ray Stevenson, Michael Jai White, Ray Park and David Paymer to act alongside. Adkins is best known for his amazing fight choreography in independent action movies and you might’ve seen him in supporting roles in larger films like X-Men Origins: Wolverine, Dr. Strange, and American Assassin. It makes me happy that he is fine-tuning his acting skills while perfecting his face kicking craft.
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2. The Raid: Redemption (2014)
The Raid was directed by Gareth Evans and stars martial arts dynamo Iko Uwais. It was made for a dirt cheap $1,000,000 and can best be described as survival horror meets Ong Bak . The cops survive by using the fighting style Pencak Silat which is similar to Muy Thai but nothing like it. The characters use elbows, knees, fists, shins, feet and many weapons to inflict carnage to the bodily organs. People get thrown down stairwells, other get their throats slit and the lucky ones get riddled with bullets. It’s the best action film of the 21st century (I said it), and you kinda need to watch it.
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3. Chocolate (2008)
Chocolate showcases the fighting skills of Jeejee Yanin perfectly, and itf you are into grueling action movies you will really dig this film. The closing action sequence, which is way-awesome-long, reminded me of longer fight scenes in The Matrix: Reloaded or the opener from Jet Li’s Fist of Legend or, to beat a dead horse, a Tony Jaa movie closer. It was inspired, exquisitely done, and had one of the most painful looking sets (for a bad guy) I’ve seen in a while. Lots of nasty looking falls.
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4. Black Dynamite (2009)
Black Dynamite is awesome, and it pains me that more people haven’t watched it. We love every second of Michael Jai White’s movie, and we’re 100% certain you will love the humor, deductive reasoning and kung fu featured in Black Dynamite.
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5. The Night Comes for Us (2018)
The Night Comes for Us is an epic action film. Blood finds its way onto the screen with similar creative inspiration as to how Tony Jaa, Iko Uwais and Scott Adkins bring creative techniques and maneuvers. This isn’t just any violent shoot’em up or stab-and-grab. Chunky gory flesh wounds abound! With all manner of unique stabbings and innovative holes being blown and cut through people, this is every bit as brutal as The Raid: Redemption (2011) and an absolute blast for any gorehound or ultraviolent cinema fan.
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6. Undisputed 2: Last Man Standing (2006)
You need to watch Undisputed 2: Last Man Standing because of the final fight between Michael Jai White and Scott Adkins. It is a brawl for the ages, and features two badasses at the height of their power.
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7. The Protector (2005)
The Protector features one of the greatest one-take action scenes of all time. Tony Jaa and his lethal elbows and knees absolutely destroy countless henchmen during a massive brawl inside a hotel. If you are a fan of beautifully orchestrated violence, you need to watch The Protector.
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8. Ong-Bak: Muay Thai Warrior (2003)
In a world where some of us grow tired of the same old kick flicks Ong-Bak (Read our review! It’s great) is the fleck of gold you pray to find amid weather-worn pebbles and sand in your sifting pan. This is the movie that unleashed Tony Jaa upon the world as a star rather than a stunt man. In clothes Jaa may not look like much. But he fights like a wiry-muscled rabid Outbreak monkey and tumbles like a Soviet gymnast as he displays his utterly savage mastery of elbow blunt force trauma to the head.
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9. The Man of Tai Chi (2013)
Keanu Reeves made this film for his friend Tiger Chen whom he worked with on The Matrix sequels. He studied the Chinese culture and worked meticulously to give his leading man the best choreography possible. Reeves enlisted Yeun Woo-Ping (The Matrix) to choreograph the fights and it shows during the brawls. Tiger fights his way through many styles and each battle has a different personality. I love how Tai Chi has been re-imagined as force of pain and it’s glorious to watch as Tiger uses it against his many foes.
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10. xXx: The Return of Xander Cage (2017)
xXx: Return of Xander Cage is a bonkers action fest that features Vin Diesel, Tony Jaa, Donnie Yen and Michael Bisping beating the crap out of each other. It’s much better than it has any right to be, and if you haven’t watched it I totally recommend you check it out on Amazon Prime.
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John’s Horror Corner: It’s Alive (2009), a gory over-the-top “baby horror” remake.
I saw the unrated version for this review.
MY CALL: Not a good remake, but a great way to giggle your way through some ridiculous, gory death scenes. MOVIES LIKE It’s Alive: For more pregnancy/baby horror, try Rosemary’s Baby (1968), The Unborn (1991), Grace (2009), The Night Feeder (1988), It’s Alive (1974, 1978, 1987), Inside (2016), Inside (2007), Still/Born (2017) and Good Manners (2017; As Boas Maneiras).
Born to perfectly normal and healthy parents, Frank (James Murray) and Lenore’s (Bijou Phillips; Venom, Hostel II, The Wizard of Gore) baby turns out to be a mutant monster in disguise. The gory birth scene is complete with a bloody disfigured fetus and an over-the-top slaughter of the operating room staff. But once the blood-soaked and even dismembered bodies were cleared, Sgt Perkins (Owen Teale; Game of Thrones) only finds a perfectly normal baby and the unconscious mother on the operating table.
Their baby boy is above average in more ways than birth weight. Just days old and the infant scratches his father and draws blood, rolls over on his own, and then apparently starts wandering around and killing small animals around the house! And like we saw in Grace (2009), this kid is no picnic when it comes to bitey breastfeeding. The infant functions as a weremonster, appearing like a normal baby until it becomes aggressive. When the baby attacks, blood jettisons across the room as if someone was attacked by a xenomorph (Aliens).
Lenore takes unconditional love to new heights and becomes somewhat insane as she acts completely normal when she’s not hiding the carcasses of animals (and then people) the baby is caught eating—and thus, hiding the truth of her little monster. I’ve never fathered a man-eating monstrous infant, so I guess who am I to judge, right?
Director Josef Rusnak’s (The Thirteenth Floor) remake/reimagining of Larry Cohen’s 1974 classic checks the standard boxes for horror tropes. There’s a shower scene, nudity, crime scenes splattered with unreasonable amounts of blood, and weak writing guiding us from one entertaining death scene to the next.
REMAKE/REIMAGINING SIDEBAR: For more horror remakes, I favor the following: Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978), An American Werewolf in London (1981), The Thing (1982; yes, this was a remake), The Fly (1986), The Mummy (1999; adventure genre), The Ring (2002), The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003), The Hills Have Eyes (2006), Friday the 13th (2009), Let Me In (2010), Evil Dead (2013), Carrie (2013), The Town That Dreaded Sundown (2014), It (2017) and Suspiria (2018). Those to avoid include The Thing (2011; a prequel/remake), Poltergeist (2015), Cabin Fever (2016), A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010), Night of the Demons (2009), Body Snatchers (1993; the second remake), The Invasion (2007; the third remake), War of the Worlds (2005) and The Mummy (2017; total adventure-style reboot-imagining). I’m on the fence about An American Werewolf in Paris (1997), Halloween (2007), My Bloody Valentine (2009) and Fright Night (2011), which are bad or so-so remakes (in my opinion) but decently entertaining movies.
I must admit, I was caught off guard and definitely giggled (a lot) when the baby snatched the house cat under the bed and later took his first human victim. Each kill escalates the zany power of this baby. It’s forceful manipulation of people being yanked out of sight is almost reminiscent of Jaws (1975) pulling people under the water, and some of the silly yet gory CGI death even reminded me of Piranha 3D (2010). The CGI is not good, but the enjoyable ridiculousness of the gore and the events transpiring carry the scenes to our laughable entertainment.
While I find this film entertaining, the acting is often painfully wooden and with nothing redeeming in the writing. Overall, this isn’t a worthy remake. But it’s a perfectly watchable horror flick.
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The MFF Podcast #177: Valley Girl
You can download or stream the pod on Spotify, Itunes, Stitcher, Tune In, Podbean, or LISTEN TO THE POD ON SPREAKER.
The MFF podcast is back, and this week we’re talking about Martha Coolidge’s 1983 cult classic Valley Girl. This movie is better than it has any right to be and that is because of Coolidge’s confident direction and a cast and crew who worked incredibly hard to make this $300,000 budgeted movie a success. We love Valley Girl because it was supposed to be a stock 1980’s stock sex comedy but was turned into a thoughtful and romantic movie featuring a career making performance from an 18-year old Nicolas Cage. If you are a fan of Valley Girl you will love this pod because we did a ton of research and did our best to honor this charming film.
If you are a fan of the podcast make sure to send in some random listener questions so we can do our best to not answer them correctly. We thank you for listening and hope you enjoy the pod!
You can download or stream the pod on Spotify, Itunes, Stitcher, Tune In, Podbean, or Spreaker
If you get a chance please make sure to review, rate and share. You are awesome!
Movies, Films & Flix 