MY CALL: I never thought I’d appreciate my 5th grade Civil War history lessons. They paid off well in gory fun that was well worth the wait. This should entertain. [C, but a B+ for pure entertainment value]. IF YOU LIKE THIS WATCH: I have no suggestions for you other than the not-so-similar The Brotherhood of the Wolf. If you have any ideas, please post them in a comment below.
Director Timur Bekmambetov is a veteran of exaggerated action and genre-splitting fang flicks, having directed Night Watch (2004), Day Watch (2006) and Wanted (2008). In addition to some of those he has produced The Darkest Hour (2011), Apollo 18 (2011) and the possible Wanted 2 (????). He picks weird projects and visually supplements them in unexpected and often impressive (though also often ridiculous) ways. He’s a creative guy and, in general, I’m pleased with his work—including his latest: Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter.
Young Abe.
Our story begins by weaving motive. Young Abraham witnesses the death of his mother at the hand of a vampire. From that day into adulthood, Abraham (Benjamin Walker in his first major role and looking like a young Liam Neeson) seeks revenge against that vampire, but hates them all.
The more stately, aged, axe-wielding Abe.
Honest Abe is trained by Henry Sturgess (Dominic Cooper; The Devil’s Double, Captain America: The First Avenger), who is as un-Yoda-like as it gets complete with rigid rules, a temper and a penchant for exterminating all vampires. One must wonder why. Of course, there’s a story there, the explanation of which would spoil the movie. He is backed by his best friend Will Johnson (Anthony Mackie; The Adjustment Bureau, Real Steel), a freeborn black man who has some unexplained skill for martial arts (in a time when it was generally unknown to the West) and axe-spinning (even though he lacked Sturgess’ Jedi tutelage).
Abe marries Mary Todd (Scream Queen Mary Elizabeth Winstead; The Thing), with whom he shares a life veiled from the truth behind his night life and political ambitions. In fact, this is where knowing some simple history gets fun. You’ll grin as you see political campaigns and war tactics steered by anti-vampire stratagem.
Our vampiric antagonist is effectively portrayed by professional villain Rufus Sewell (A Knight’s Tale, The Illusionist). As Adam, the 5000-year old maker of all vampires, Sewell is cold and enjoyably hatable. He leads the Confederate vampires of the South in their invasion of the North in the Civil War. His personal cadre enjoys the bedazzling company of Vadoma (played by newcomer/model Erin Wasson, who already looked rather vampy before doing this movie). She plays her simple part well and I hope to see more of her in more challenging roles.
Here, the sultry Erin Wasson is all vamped up for her scene.
And here, the sexy Wasson is all vamped up just because it’s Tuesday in Hollywood. Sexy, yes. But also cold as ice–like into those man-eating eyes.
The movie ends with a brief present day scene which smacks of Interview with a Vampire’s “I’m going to give you the choice that I never had.” An endearing nod, but not without a little eye-rolling to accompany my acknowledgement—not that this was the only time in the movie when that happened.
THE SETS: Now, I only noticed this because I always ask myself “now how do I feel about the cinematography and set design”—but I was largely unimpressed with both (excluding some action sequence work, though). Had I not been looking for it, I might not have noticed most of the time. The scenes were still effective and I don’t think too many people will wish they got more from this department unless, again like me, they specifically look for it.
To be, or not to be, in 3D: I saw this in 3D, and it wasn’t until the second act action scenes that I sensed that this might have been filmed in 3D. There was just something about the first act’s movement, zooming and background that felt a bit untidily modified-from-2D-to-3D. As it turns out, I saw the HBO making of special and noticed the same stale, artificial focus and contrast during zooming in 2D. However, once the second act action begins, you see that the action was clearly made (and well made) for 3D. It’s just that the 3D felt like a natural improvement for some scenes, but actually obscured trademark scenes like the one-swing-tree-splitting when compared to HBO’s (and the TV trailer’s) much crisper 2D presentation. One scene really didn’t fit in 2D or 3D, and that’s the “stampede fight.” When you see this, everything is so obscured by choppy focus and lazy-hazy blurred CGI that you wonder if they ran out of budget and then realized “Hey guys, we still need to do the Stampede Fight.”
My final decision: I’d vote to see this in 3D.
He must’ve been working out with Sosa and McGuire.
THE ACTION: After witnessing his tree-splitting training and some impressive axe-spinning flair I’m reminded of Ray Parks’ work as the headless horseman (Sleepy Hollow) and Darth Maul (The Phantom Menace). The action starts somewhere in the middle; it’s very blood-letty, fast-paced and entertaining, but also filmed very close up such that you see very little. So I was quite entertained while also wishing it was done differently. But during this first act of the movie the events, build-up and consequence were more important than the fights themselves. Whereas in the second act elaborately choreographed and CGI-enhanced scenes spew gore, sever limbs, and add complex acrobatics from a wide angle allowing full realization of intricate marriages between combat choreographers and CGI engineers. The sets were more open, much as were for many of Neo’s fights in the 2nd and 3rd Matrix movies, which allowed more freedom in planning grandiose maneuvers with more combatants. There’s even a healthy dash of post-impact slo-mo (a la 300 or The Immortals) as caped bodies and weapons corkscrew through the air about trailing cascades of black blood. Very well done indeed. The action shifts gears yet again for the third act (with a more aged Lincoln) and include a Western-style train action sequence and Civil War battle scenes. There’s a good deal of unrealistic skill and precision which hemorrhages absurdity this flick, but I found myself not minding a bit despite some playful Oh-come-ons.
In the spirit of The Matrix this flickcomes complete with jumping flip kicks…
Gratuitous jumping, spinning, 720-degree double-axe to the face moves…
And hits so hard that you’ll corkscrew flair through the air for so long that Abe will have time to wind up again and cut off your head.
THE STORY: This movie succeeded where many failed in utilizing a multi-story-style 3-act model. What do I mean? I mean The Brotherhood of the Wolf model. Each act of The Brotherhood of the Wolf felt like a different movie—it began with a period piece mystery, shifted to a large-scale action-driven phase, and then finished as a somewhat supernatural revenge flick, any one of which could have been its own stand-alone film. Movies that try to do too much (like this) often fail. In Abraham Lincoln we have a plotty origin story, followed by a more typical vampire hunter choreography-driven flick, and ended with an aged Abe and a politico-military historical piece where period mattered and fights took place in less martial arts-friendly venues. Again, any one of these parts could have been the vampire-gnawed blood and guts of a whole separate movie. 
While on paper, the concept must sound like it skirts lunacy, this exercise in absurd fantasy-horror-war-history hybridization comes off as a great summer action flick. You’ll be surprised at how seriously you’ll take it—as if hypnotized by some True Blood glamour. So I say see it. Be glamoured and dazzled. Enjoy.
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Jeff, Who Lives at Home
Jeff Who Lives At Home asks a lot of questions. Fate? Free will? Goatee? The film is directed by the Duplass brothers who struck indie gold with Cyrus and The Puffy Chair. Their film deals with arrested development in all its forms. Jeff stays on the shallow end of the subject matter but stays engaging due to its actors and unique direction.
I don’t think it ever wanted to be The Tree of Life. But, it boasts the uneven narrative that the Duplass brothers are fine tuning. I don’t think their style will hit the mainstream because their stories are methodically paced and focus on big aspects of people who live small lives. The Duplass brothers create movies that are intimate to them. I like their style and would trade an uneven narrative for likable characters.
Jeff does an interesting thing. It creates characters that are a mixture of terrible depression and arrested development. They could easily be viewed as unambitious and unlikable. However, with Jeff and Cyrus you appreciate the characters because of the actors performances. If the actors weren’t so warm and likable you’d feel terrible for them.
Jason Segel plays a 30-year-old man best described as an unkept stoner Sasquatch. Jeff lives at home and smokes weed. His widowed mother (Susan Sarandon) is confused and exasperated by her man-child.
He thinks the world is full of signs and coincidences. Thus, he waits in the basement looking for bigger things. He won’t settle because destiny hasn’t pushed him yet. However, after multiple viewings of the film Signs he gets a wrong number from a man looking for Kevin.
This leads him on a day long journey of coincidences and brotherly bonding. His brother is played Ed Helms. His character is a marvel of blue-collar douche and depressed obliviousness. He settled and is in an unhappy marriage and has resorted to acting recklessly to add entertainment in his life. His poor decisions lead him to buying a Porsche. However, his wife has resorted to flirting with adultery to cure her reckless needs.
Their lives seem so unhappy that it takes a lot to believe their ills will be cured in one day. The end of their day features an incredibly unlikely event which is incredibly effective. If you don’t like the characters and the Duplass style you will dislike the heavy melodramatic turn of events. However, the ending worked for me. Why not give these people a happy ending?
Jeff, Who Lives at Home is the work of two men who are finding their footing in the film world. Their style is simple and they make sad characters likable. The worlds are small but to the characters the changes are life changing.
Watch Jeff, Who Lives at Home. Support interesting directors. Watch Signs.
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This Means War (2012) [a second opinon]
MY CALL: Ridiculous, silly, unrealistic, but really just plain fun. [B-] IF YOU LIKE THIS WATCH: The level of silly fun in this flick really smacks of How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days (2003) and Keeping the Faith (2000), but without all the spy hoo-jazz.
A romantic comedy with an action-backdrop. It’s been done before, but in the past and limited by smaller budgets and less easily achievable CGI technology. This little date night charmer comes complete with serviceable (but admittedly, and hopefully intentionally, stupid) action—great, in fact, for a RomCom—and a good buddy dynamic between our two best friend spy-by-trade male leads: The ever-shallow ladies’ man, FDR (Chris Pine; Bottle Shock, Star Trek, Unstoppable), and the more soulful and soul-mate-y, Tuck (Tom Hardy; Inception, Warrior, Dark Knight Rises).
Here our heroes let the villain (a lousy attempt at a mini-side-plot) get away in an overelaborate escape.
Both actors have proven their worth with a recent flurry of genre admixture. Then, of course there’s Lauren (Reese Witherspoon; Water for Elephants, How Do You Know), an overly sharp, generally adorable, successful Consumer Report analyst who can’t seem to find a date even though she has a great attitude and takes care of herself—oh, and she’s as cute as Reese Witherspoon. Don’t find it plausible? Don’t care? The flick simply works in its own silly way and Chelsea Handler is fantastically funny as Witherspoon’s sister.
The flick kicks off when Tuck and Lauren meet via ItsFate.com for their first date. It’s rather abbreviated, but quite sweet. Shortly after, FDR bumps into Lauren, fancies her and has a womanizer meets girl-power innuendo battle which culminates in an invasion of her workplace until she agrees to a date. Tuck and FDR find out the very next day that they like the same girl. Neither is willing to back down so it is suggested they compete to win her affection. And, with two newly adversely-faced best friends vying for the same woman, we found the title of this movie: This Means War!
Tuck and FDR’s friend dynamic is great. It starts with the naïve gentleman’s agreement that if their competition over Laura affects their friendship then they both would stop pursuing her—as if! They get together for Chips marathons and work together and really know little more than the other has to teach. During their bro-romantic feud they both abuse their surveillance and super-spy gadgetry privileges at work. As The Hof pointed out in his BMT featurette, this likely cost a lot of tax-payer dollars.
Their recon leads them to all of her childhood fantasies and…some unreasonable adult fantasies as well. Of course, being overpaid fantasy-movie spies, they make them happen with no problem while competing for her affection. When it comes to using CIA ear-pieces (inciting the Patriot Act, for God’s sake) to have their subordinates aid them, and the sabotage thereof, it got truly wonderful. Seeing FDR try to narrate art history while Tuck listened and chimed in to distract him…simply priceless.
Tranq dart to the neck. Always funny, especially when tranq’ing someone who’s on a date with the girl you like.
Overhearing their own flaws and watching themselves overcompensate on surveillance footage is nothing if not enjoyable. To win her over they adopt milky-eyed, venerable dogs and paintball preteens into post-traumatic-stress-disorder to make up for their perceived flaws. Thank you, Chelsea Handler, for helping to make that happen. Handler brings up sex at the most inappropriate times and I dare not ruin how.
After a few rounds of capture-the-flag with this fanatic, those kids will go back to playing Dungeons and Dragons in mom’s basement.
No matter what the conflict, these brothers in arms returned to each other as besties. The happy endings number more than one and will leave you feeling all warm and fuzzy in the standardly lame ways. FYI, the ending is glorious!
SIDEBAR: So Chris Pine is taller than Tom Hardy and, when they’re in suits, he even looks bigger and refers to Hardy as his “small friend” jestingly in the movie’s opening scene. But we all know that if they throw down Hardy is going to ruin Pine and then grind him up into a protein shake, right?
Ah, Chelsea Handler. Still trying to drown your feelings in cabernet I see. Well, at least this makes for seriously dirty-funny sex jokes.
Favorite Quotes, all from Chelsea Handler except one, FYI (see Bridesmaids favorite quotes as well—good stuff):
“Stop referring to Boggle like it’s a man. You sound like a woman who has nine cats and knits her ass off.”
“You know when you know you’re going to have dirty sex and it’s gonna’ stink? Not like sex. I mean like man stink, the good stuff.”
“Do you think Gloria Steinham got arrested and sat in a jail cell so you could act like a little bitch? I don’t think so!”
“You’re not going to Hell. And if you go there, I’ll be there to pick you up.”
“Agent Foster entered the premises. Then, he—uh…entered the premises.”
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Bad Movie Tuesday: Dark Shadows
Dark Shadows is the end of an era. An era filled with strange characters, memorable visuals and the beautiful macabre. Tim Burton and Johnny Depp have teamed up for some wonderful films (Edward Scissorhands, Sleepy Hollow, Ed Wood) The recent collaborations have been box office hits (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Alice in Wonderland) that sacrificed the weirder aspects of the early works for commercial success.
What once was unpredictable, dark and imaginative is now predictable. It used to be that Depp was in a Tim Burton film. Now, the audience talks about Johnny Depp’s over the top characters that inhabit Tim Burton’s movies. Gone is the dark atmosphere and rich characters. What we are stuck with is Burton letting Depp be Depp. Letting Depp be Depp is not an entirely bad thing. He did put his spin on Captain Jack Sparrow and the series has made billions. Nowadays, instead of letting the humor and appeal come from the characters Dark Shadows puts Depp in zany situations and expects laughs.
Depp is not the fresh-faced 27-year-old who appeared in Edward Scissorhands. That role gave him a weird/dangerous factor that summed up his career. The film also knew how to incorporate humor with the dangerous. Remember the scene where Depp and Winona Ryder first meet? She walks into her room and startles Edward who then pokes holes in a water mattress. The scene makes you laugh and realize how inadvertently dangerous and ill-suited Edward was to everyday life. It was humor from the moment. In Dark Shadows it is Depp doing things.
Dark Shadows focuses on Johnny Depp’s character named Barnabas Collins. Barnabas was the heir to a huge fishing company. However, he angered a witch who killed his parents, girlfriend, turned him into a vampire. Then, he was imprisoned in a coffin for two hundred years. He is accidentally let loose in 1972 and has to deal with disco, cars and hippies. He tries to restore his families luster while Eva Green’s angry witch foils his every step.
What is lacking in this movie is danger, surprise and originality. Burton’s films are normally populated with zany goth characters wonderful misfits. This film lacks the third dimension. Depp is confused, Pfeiffer is a survivor, Moretz is a brat, Miller is a turd and Green is angry.
Dark Shadows has the look, characters and style of a Depp/Burton collaboration. However, it seemed so content to nail the look and make Depp weird that it forgot to add substance.
I’m hoping the next Burton/Depp collaboration will combine the box office success with the coherent weirdness of their earlier works.
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Moonrise Kingdom
Moonrise Kingdom is another Wes Anderson masterpiece. The film boasts a self-assured Anderson doing what he does best. Wes Anderson makes wonderful Wes Anderson films. What do Anderson movies include? beautiful set design, quirky characters, obscure music, and a plethora of dolly shots.
His movies are quotable, memorable and require multiple viewings. They also feature the three Ds (death, divorce, depression). The visuals and jokes come so fast you barely have time to appreciate everything you are seeing. Whether it is a motorcycle in a tree or Bill Murray throwing a shoe at Ed Norton there is always a funny/surprising moment. One thing I love about Wes Anderson films is that a throw away joke can become your favorite moment after further inspection.
Wes has added another element to his arsenal. Moonrise Kingdom has a genuine warmth to go along with the quirks. The two key players responsible for the depth are Edward Norton and Bruce Willis. The two have actors are notorious for being difficult (Hulk, Cop Out, The Score). However, they seem to have bought into the Anderson mind-set and bring another dimension that was only glimpsed on the surface of prior Wes films. Their scenes with young Sam are true works of odd art.
The movie centers around two precocious yet slightly deranged 12 year olds who run away together on a sleepy island inhabited by Wes Anderson characters. Looking for them are Bruce Willis, Edward Norton, Bill Murray, Frances McDormand and Tilda Swinton. They also come across Jason Schwartzman and Harvey Keitel.
Bruce Willis adds a surprising amount of warmth and sadness to his police officer. Edward Norton is a perfect mixture of aloof and capable as the Khaki Scout Master. Bill Murray is a depressed man who gets drunk and chops down trees. McDormand is his wife and a successful lawyer who is stymied by her occasionally enraged daughter.
The movie works on every level. I laughed all the way through. After this film and The Royal Tenenbaums it is clear that Anderson knows how to make stab wounds funny. Also, the set design reminded me a lot of Life Aquatic. The practical sets and unique construction allow for long dolly moves that feature beautifully framed shots. Also, I loved the two young actors who hit every note correctly. Their roles required them to be confident, capable and wise yet still behave like kids.
Moonrise Kingdom is the product of a man who knows what he likes. All of his films may share the same visual flair and eccentric characters. However, he is constantly evolving in ways that add more depth to the familiar. With each film his characters become more human without sacrificing the odd qualities that make them such beloved characters.
Watch Moonrise Kingdom. Dig the depth. Appreciate the warmth. Don’t get stabbed by scissors.
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American: The Bill Hicks Story
American: The Bill Hicks Story is a marvel of archival footage and interesting narrative. The film chronicles the life and death of Comedian Bill Hicks and his years in the American comedy scene.
Hicks career was full of alcohol, drugs. anger, laughs, music and psychedelic mushrooms. His career took off in an age before YouTube, CDs and Internet message boards. His anti-war and angry stage presence made him a savior amongst comedians and critics but he never caught on with the American populace. His style of comedy was never popular but it was groundbreaking. He allowed fellow comedians to follow in his trail blazing failures.
The documentary does an interesting thing with the narrative and visuals. Instead of various talking heads it employs pictures of Hicks to be used in interesting ways. What follows is an innovative way to tell a story. If you are a fan of stand up comedy you should know about Bill Hicks. His presence and material are apparent in Bill Maher, Lewis Black and multitudes of other comedians.
Watch this documentary if you are a fan of visually interesting film making. The story of Bill Hicks is an innovative doc that tells a wonderful story of a man who was appreciated too late.
Watch the wonderful Senna as well. They are both solid docs on Netflix.
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Melancholia
Two hours of beautiful depression. A collection of moving art featuring depressed rich white people. Directed by one of the most polarizing directors today. A director who requires his own poster and promo photos when he makes a movie.
If you are a fan of film then you should be familiar with Lars Von Trier. He is a mad genius who polarizes the movie going populace. His movies look great but they are rarely positive and often controversial. His movies range from experimental (Dogville) to insane (Antichrist).
Regardless, he still manages to make beautiful looking films that focus on depression, depravity and more depression. This is the first time that one of his films have pushed into the mainstream. This still isn’t his Drive but he is closer to the outskirts of the mainstream. If he learns to curb his insanity and depression he could make a brilliant looking film that might make some money.
The depression in this movie is understandable. The movie focuses on a planet named Melancholia that is two weeks away from hitting the earth. The movie starts at a wedding and ends on a golf course. In this time marriages end, suicide happens and the world is destroyed.
All of this depression looks beautiful. Von Trier creates a visually rich stark world. The shot selection is picturesque and the acting wonderful. Also, Von Trier uses the Phantom camera in creative and practical ways. The super slow motion shots are works of art.
Kirsten Dunst is also really good at playing a character that is more of an emotion than an actual person. The actors in this film play off the various stages of grief that occur when a huge planet is about to obliterate the planet.
This movie is like hiking to the top of a mountain. The journey is a monster but the view is great. You won’t enjoy many moments of the trip but the hike makes you stronger and you can tell pretentious stories while at parties.
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Prometheus
Prometheus looks for answers and succeeds in sparking conversations. love it or hate it you will want to talk about it. It is a philosophical science fiction film that shares the same DNA as The Grey. They are both films that question life, death and survival. However, they were marketed as slam-bang wolf punching terror. They were never meant to be huge. They were personal films made by two capable directors.
Prometheus is about two scientists searching for the engineers who created life. One uses faith the other science. The problem is that you don’t always want to find the answers because the answers will kill you and provide the DNA for the Alien series.
The reason this film will not go down is a classic is simple. The top six thriller films according to AFI are Psycho, Jaws, Exorcist, North by Northwest, The Silence of the Lambs and Alien. These films feature people who are doing their job or are in over their heads. Their motives are not filled by greed, power or selfishness. They are dealing with the situations they’ve been handed. Thus, you support the characters because they are doing what they have to do. Prometheus focuses on the gains of several people and you dont have the connection with the characters like you do in Jaws or Alien.
Michael Fassbender steals the show as the android David 8. He is the wild card in a ship full of personalities. Is he like Ash from Alien or Bishop from Aliens? Regardless of his motives he is the catalyst for all the chaos.
Noomi Rapace holds up in the physical scenes. Logan Marshall-Green is appropriately confident. The supporting characters are good but inconsequential. The most engaging character moments happen between Idris Elba’s smooth captain and Charlize Theron’s icy supervisor.
Another reason why Prometheus will never be a classic is because of the occasional head scratching choices the crew makes. Why take off your helmet while in an alien built catacomb? Also, there are a couple of moments I want to mention but for spoiler sake I will not. These choices do not matter in the long run (they would die anyway) but they do take you out of the story.
What Prometheus excels at is creating a beautiful look and eerie mood. The practical sets blend perfectly with the CGI and there is always a sense of dread. The look and practical sets achieve a look rarely achieved on-screen. The movie lived up to the visual hype that has been building in my mind.
Prometheus swings for the fences and almost gets there. However, that “almost” is enough. I’d rather watch a film with hiccups that attempts to build a world. Many movies simply try to manage expectations and keep a ship afloat. Prometheus asks big questions, provides memorable visuals and has given the populace an adult science fiction film to discuss.
If you go and watch Prometheus on IMAX 3D make sure your IMAX glasses are clean. They recycle the glasses and they have smudges. I was plagued by the smudges while watching John Carter. I made sure the glasses were cleaned this time. The lady at the ticket drop was cool and cleaned them again. Thus, the viewing was smudge free. Don’t be afraid to ask for them to be cleaned.
Enjoy Prometheus. Watch it and comment.
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MY CALL: So bad. At times funny, but ultimately not worth the guilt of choosing to watch something so inane. I never want to see or hear about this movie again. [D] WHAT TO WATCH INSTEAD: Want to see someone with cool powers fighting a cool devil? Watch Constantine (2005).
They waste no time lacing this movie with implausibility. Even after we accept the existence of the supernatural Ghost Rider as a given, the super high-tech monks in minute-two had me Oh God-ing from the very start. I’ve seen these monks before, too, so this ridiculous concept isn’t even original. The Van Damme-Dennis Rodman buddy action flick Double Team (1997) had them, too.
Spirit of Vengeance follows the new wave franchise trend of going international with the storyline. Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker saw Rush Hour traffic in China and France. The Karate Kid series kicked young adult butt in Japan and China. The Fast and the Furious stamped their passports in Japan, Brazil, and the UK in the upcoming Fast 6 with Haywire’s Gina Carano and returning Dwayne Johnson. And the Indiana Jones and Mission Impossible series always takes place in other countries.
We receive a nice little Cage-narrated background of why and how Johnny Blaze became “the rider.” Later, we also learn just what the Spirit of Vengeance actually is. We meet some techno-monks and learn that some child’s fate will determine the fate of the world. And then there’s the incentive. Some “ancient church” will remove Blaze’s curse if he saves this boy from the devil.
Let’s add some cynical irony, shall we? In Stigmata and Dogma our theological keystone characters were atheists and one of them worked at an abortion clinic. In this, the boy and his mother are drifters who hustle their way from one meal to the next. Then there’s our cell-phone toting, business class devil (Ciarán Hinds; The Woman in Black). I prefer my devils more like the Bedazzled Elizabeth Hurley, Angel Heart’s Louis Cypher or Constantine’s Lucifer. Our devil just isn’t sleek, off-putting, or handsome; just a lame, old school CEO-type. His powers are limited on Earth, in human form, and he relies on deals to find emissaries to carry out desired tasks.
For Ghost Rider the action is good, what little there is, and the effects are A-one. They also had a little fun with the concept that whatever Ghost Rider rides becomes sort of a Hellfire version of itself.
But the cons outstandingly outweigh the pros. The story is lame, the primary antagonist is a regular human schmuck (Carrigan) and he is later transformed into a somehow even less interesting and dumb looking supernatural semi-undead villain, Cage has some really weak father-figure moments with the boy, and the boring devil’s role is minimal. Also Carrigan’s post-transformation make-up is awful and his action scenes are poorly imagined. Carrigan’s face off with Ghost Rider is a complete disappoint.
So this is the best they could come up with? Son of Hobo with a Shotgun, here? He looks like he should have a cardboard sign at an interstate exit ramp.
Christopher Lambert (Beowulf, Highlander) plays the ancient church’s monk leader with mad face tats. They are pressure point senseis, expert winemakers with a 2000-year old wine cellar, and gunsmiths of advanced artillery—making them the second least plausible monastery ever in this movie (second only to the techno-monks).
Nic, that’s exactly how we all feel after watching your movie. Now how many Aspirin do I have to chase with vodka to forget that this movie ever happened?
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Bad Movie Tuesday: The Devil Inside
A 7% rating on Rotten Tomatoes and an “F” cinemascore guaranteed that I would watch this movie. It deserved all the internet vitriol, audience boos and twitter hate. However, it did make $20 million in its opening weekend and only cost $1 million.
This movie would make an interesting case study in marketing success. If you promote anything at the right time you will have yourself a hit film. However, so many internet savvy people watched it the opening weekend it cost the film dearly. Because, afterwards the internet exploded with Devil Inside dislike. It was an interesting phenomena. The marketers fooled the audience and it cost the long-term success of the genre. Take for instance, the better reviewed Chernobyl Diaries did poorly at the box office due to fatigue.
I cheated a bit while watching this movie. I fast forwarded through all of the exorcism moments because they were unnecessary and exploitive. I could care less about a bunch of actors wrestling with an old woman with a deep voice.
The reason I watched this movie was to understand the badness. I figured it out in the first thirty seconds. The movie is supposed to resemble a found footage film but the acting is bad. It feels like people are acting and not being natural. A found footage movie hinges on the acting. Paranormal Activity worked because the two leads were natural. The Last Exorcism somewhat worked because of the strength of Cotton Marcus. Troll Hunter worked like gangbusters with its creativity and solid acting.
The Devil Inside is incredibly bad. The acting hurts, the plot wonky and the source material vague. When I say bad acting I mean that the actors cannot play natural. You can tell they are trying…They watched other films and copied them. Thus, it feels forced and not believable.
The movie is humorously promoted as “inspired by an actual story.” So, If I’m inspired by a football game and I write a dinosaur movie I can say it was inspired by an actual story. Also, they asked the Catholic Church for help. The church said no. So, now they promote how the Church wouldn’t help them.
This film made money however it hurt the genre. This is a great thing. It will force the creators to come up with creative endeavors that don’t exploit the movie going audience to make a few dollars.
The Devil Inside is a bad film that will do good things for the found footage genre. It will force creators to re-evaluate the audience and create interesting things that people will want to see.
Movies, Films & Flix 