MY CALL: The After Dark Horrorfest breathes cinematic life into a 30 year old Clive Barker story in this difficult-to-watch film about obsession, fear and psychological torture. MORE MOVIES LIKE Dread: Hmmmm…tough to say. I’d lean toward Deadgirl (2008) and I Spit on Your Grave (1978, 2010)–which both deal in rape and revenge whereas Dread does not touch the rape issue. Much more intense and fear/torture-based is Martyrs (2008).
Written and directed by (at the time) fledgling director Anthony DiBlasi (The Profane Exhibit segment “Mother May I”, Cassadaga) and from the story originally penned by Clive Barker (Hellraiser, Nightbreed, Lord of Illusions), Dread was the bell of the ball for 2010’s After Dark Horrorfest 4.
Stephen (Jackson Rathbone) and Cheryl (Hanne Steen) conducting an interview.
The story focuses on three troubled souls: Stephen (Jackson Rathbone; Twilight, S. Darko) lost his older brother to a car accident, Quaid (Shaun Evans) witnessed the brutal murder of his parents, and Cheryl (Hanne Steen) was abused by her father. These three film students with three haunted pasts come together to pursue an academic film study of fear for a class project designed to interview subjects and plumb their way to the root of how their fears affect them.
At some point this “study” becomes unsatisfying for one of the filmmakers, who finds the need to push the project beyond any reasonable (or sane) level. Past fear subjects are revisited and forced to relive and/or confront their debilitating fear.
Quaid (Shaun Evans) getting a little crazy.
Stephen (Jackson Rathbone) getting a little crazy.
Vivid camerawork accompanied by visceral, creatively approahced gore serve us well, adding much needed dimension to the oft-stale genre. A broad range of effective lighting techniques, color correction and innovative gore effects sporadically litter this film with pleasant surprises. Pleasant in hindsight, that is, since these scenes are often shocking when first encountered. Almost reminiscent of Flatliners (1990), some psychological-hallucinogenic self-torment complements harmful situations imposed by more tangible antagonists.
Stephen’s friend Abby.
The scenes that best illustrate such carefully shot images are what I’ll call “the stripper scene” and “the steak.” They utilize effects (including solid sound-editing/mixing) and create tones that are not necessarily ground-breaking in uniqueness, but they’re done so well overall that these scenes really stuck with me.
Cheryl getting a little crazy.
The writing is nothing special, but the actors are all quite convincing. I only wish that more time was dedicated to developing the plot from “conducting a film study” to “becoming obsessed with human dread” before the story flew off the hinges in the third act. I enjoyed the ending. I just would have enjoyed a more gradual descent into madness on the parts of both the film students and their subjects.
Abby getting a little crazy.
Overall I was quite impressed and would recommend this to fans of the “difficult to watch” flavors of horror. Anyone in need of more convincing should search for “Dread” on r/Horror (Reddit). There have been many discussions about this film–just be wary of the spoiler-rich waters in Reddit’s tides.
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John’s Horror Corner: Just Before Dawn (1981), killing hillbillies one fatal mouth-fisting at a time
MY CALL: Paced too slow and more dumb than disturbing, yet this attempt at an inbred slasher Deliverance managed to impress me with one redeeming death scene in the finale that I’ll never forget. MOVIES LIKE Just Before Dawn: The Burning (1981), The Hills Have Eyes franchise (1977, 1984, 2006, 2007).
Crammed into an RV and heading to some recently inherited land out in the wilderness, the feisty redhead Megan (Jamie Rose; Chopper Chicks in Zombie Town), the worrisome and reserved Constance (Deborah Benson; Ghost Fever), Daniel (Ralph Seymour; Ghoulies), our adventurous tough guy Warren (Gregg Henry; Raising Cain, Slither) and Jonathan (Chris Lemmon; Wishmaster) have set out on a camping outing.
As they make their way in, one of them notes “I wonder why there are so many twins out here.” I wonder why so many of them look homeless, feral, inbred, hungry and dangerous! Keeping in pace with horror canon, they naturally pay no mind to the dangerous, unwelcoming-looking local mountain folk and continue on their journey. Forest Ranger Roy (George Kennedy; Brain Dead, Creepshow 2, Death Ship, The Terror Within) serves as the harbinger, ominously warning the five youngsters away from the mountain suggesting grave consequences but no details. As if they hadn’t enough red flags waving in their face, they encounter a scared drunkard (Mike Kellin; Sleepaway Camp) whose hunting buddy was killed by an over-sized, wheezy-laughing homicidal man-child. He warns them not to go on with an intoxicated rant–while, of course, not mentioning the murderous hillbilly or his dead friend. Again, as if they have no idea they were cast in a slasher/horror movie, they press on and heed not his warnings, passing them off as alcohol-induced lunacy.
I really feel the need to pause here and point out that most backwoods slasher movies begin with one warning sign–for example, dirty inbred mountain people OR a forest ranger’s warning OR a drunk’s warning that gets ignored. In this case we have all three! So, that said, I feel that these twentysomethings deserve whatever bloody end they meet. I’ll also point out that these tenderfoots clearly never camped before, because they try to drive a loaded RV up a root-knobbed mountain trail. It comes as no surprise when these idiots’ vehicle gets stuck and they must continue on foot. Sure. Because who’s worried about the local mountain people? They won’t do anything to the abandoned vehicle! Later, these fools choose to cross a dubious looking rope bridge–no boards, just rope! It’s just one bad decision after another.
No one saw that coming!
They encounter a young woman in the woods who flees upon their approach. This, AGAIN, is not a good sign. It’s weird! It would make ME nervous. Later we meet her mountain folk parents who shoot–yes, SHOOT, like with a shotgun–their stereo. Yet more reasons to not be on this mountain where, by the way, nobody else wants you to be! Despite all these worrisome warning signs that still go completely ignored, Constance slowly switched gears from being a nervous prude to loosening up a bit. She dresses more scantily and gets more playful.
The pacing of this film is devastatingly slow. Hardly anything happens in the first hour and what little that does happen is presented with zero suspense, fright, gore or intensity (except for in the first five minutes when a man is stabbed “through” the pelvis–that was cool). At about the hour mark the movie shifts gears and our wheezy man-child of a killer becomes more proactive in his twentysomething-killing endeavors.
The killer is obese, ugly and childishly simple (clearly mentally retarded from inbreeding) and toys with his victims. This is meant to be disturbing, I found it weak in execution and really just dumb. The gore is rare and, typical of the era, the kills are reduced to seeing the victim “after” they’ve been stabbed. But what makes this entire movie worth it is when, while her boyfriend watches and whimpers, Constance goes toe-to-toe with our killer and literally fists him to death! This was one of the most memorable slasher movie kills EVER!
Open wide!
This is definitely a contender for the “most bonkers kill of the 80s.”
I’d say horror collectors should go for it and watch this. If you own fewer than a few hundred horror movies, you probably won’t have the patience for this yet.
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Philomena
Philomena is a fine film that walks a tightrope of drama, faith and fact. Based on the 2009 nonficiton book “The Lost Child of Philomena Lee” written by Martin Sixsmith the film juggles issues of faith and belief that would feel false if not true. Stephen Holden of NYT summed up the film correctly when he wrote:
In less confident hands, the film could have been a mawkish, rambling tear-jerker.
If this film weren’t based on a true story it would have been a bombardment of shameless tearjerker plot fodder. However, since it is grounded in realism you appreciate the tactfulness of the proceedings. There is a lot going on under the surface and that is deftly handled by Coogan and Dench.
Philomena centers around a young Irish girl who becomes pregnant out of wedlock and is dropped off at a convent in 1952 Ireland. She is forced to endure four years of hard labor while cleaning clothes seven days a week. She sees her son for one hour a day and he is eventually adopted by a rich American family for 1,000 pounds. The convent keeps the money and she continues to clean without ever knowing what happened to her son.
She holds onto the secret for 50 years and finally tells her daughter about it. The daughter randomly meets Steve Coogan’s character and the human interest story begins. The poster and marketing make you believe it will be a charming journey of two polar opposites. However, their mission is bleak and the themes heavier than your standard road trip film.
Judi Dench makes Philomena open minded and independent yet still nails her small town upbringing. She is a devoted Catholic and often tells people they are “one in a millon.” She is no bumpkin but also tells a Mexican chef that “Mexico sounds great. Except for all the kidnappings.” The performance is a lot harder than it looks and if you watch this and Skyfall back to back you will be amazed at Dench’s acting range. She has to be independent but still from a small town. Staunch in some areas and open to other ideas. Here is a woman who was dealt a bad hand and decided to become a nurse. She helped others when injustice had been done to her. Then, she has to worry about the portion sizes in America.
Steve Coogan’s Blacksmith is self diagnosed as “mildly depressed” and floundering after he was fired from his job. He is considering writing a book about Russian history, can be deeply cynical and has little patience for religion. He takes the Philomena job out of necessity and slowly warms to the little lady he journeys with. The two eventually bond but he still has to endure stories of her books and desire to watch Big Momma’s House.
There are dramatic moments when the music swells and the tears flow. However, my favorite moments were in the minutia. It is interesting to watch as Coogan’s character is full of vitriol while the woman who lived through the ordeal is forgiving. The end of the film features Dench at her best as she confronts the wrongdoers. The moment is really surprising and Philomena shows an understanding beneath her love of hokey books.
Philomena walks a very fine line and it does so well. The themes of forgiveness, reconciliation and closure are juggled well and the film never feels black and white. I applaud the acting, writing and directing because in the wrong hands it could have become an excessive mess that cheapened the sad yet inspiring journey that Philomena Lee experienced.
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John’s Old School Horror Corner: Up from the Depths (1979)
MY CALL: A not so classic, Roger Corman sea monster installment that is NOT worth anyone’s time. MOVIES LIKE Up from the Depths: Demon of Paradise (1987), Humanoids from the Deep (1980), Piranha (1978) and Piranha II: The Spawning (1982).
Roger Corman sure does like to ruin a fine day at the beach doesn’t he? Demon of Paradise (1987), Humanoids from the Deep (1980), Piranha (1978) and Piranha II: The Spawning (1982) all ruin family vacations by the sea. Also, for whatever reason, the vacationers never seem to leave after the first few bodies start piling up, do they?
Meet Rachel. She’s never prepared when people take photos of her.
Here’s her face when she found out how this movie did at the box office.
In this Shakespearian plot, an underwater earthquake releases a man-eating sea monster to terrorize the Hawaiian archipelago. After a tourist in Hawaii emerges from the water covered in guts and shark heads wash up on the beach, the resort manager assumes his competition is dumping chum in the water to make him look bad in this hokey Jaws rip-off.
Judging by the attitude and the movement of her right arm, I’m guessing she was trying to flash a gang symbol of something.
The resort manager gets Rachel, a resort employee, to investigate the matter. She turns to Greg for help. Greg works on a small charter fishing boat. When they fail to solve the problem, Greg’s fishing boat captain and the resort manager decide to put a bounty on the monster, encouraging even resort guests to band together to kill it with spears and spear guns. Not sure why, but no one thought about nets and literally fishing for it with high-test line and over-sized hooks off of charter boats. Seems like a good idea to me.
This face is tough. I’m guessing she’s thinking something to the tune of “Did I just fart?”
This movie proceeds at a devastatingly slow pace, even more so than normal for this kind of low budget monster movie. The kills seem few, brief and unexciting, and we almost never see the monster for more than a couple seconds at a time. When something actually does happen, we never really see anything happen. Typically all you see is a POV shot of whatever the shark monster is about to bite, then a cloud of blood in the water, followed by a splash where the victim has just disappeared.
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Bad Movie Tuesday: Chernobyl Diaries
Hello all. Mark here.
O’lasavath has been contributing to the blog for a long time. Whether he is delivering pithy comments for movie trailers or putting together a football team of nothing but characters from romantic comedies he has been around a while. However, this is his first review. He got tasked with watching Chernobyl Diaries. Co-writer John already reviewed the film but I have a strange fascination with Diaries. I find it intriguing that a movie about radioactive mutants rarely shows the radioactive mutants. So, I wanted O’lasavath’s opinion of the film.
Here it is! Thanks O’lasavath!
Chernobyl Diaries tricked me. I went into the movie expecting to absolutely loathe it. I prepared a slew of vicious put-downs and jokes in anticipation for how bad this movie was going to be. I felt like an archer at the Macy’s Day Parade: expecting a never-ending line of easy targets to take down. None of that happened, however, as the unthinkable happened. I didn’t hate the movie. I went from wanting to hate the movie to pulling for it to succeed.
Chernobyl Diaries comes from producer Oren Peli of Paranormal Activity (read all about the series here, here and here) fame. Diaries is not a “found footage” horror film like the rest of Peli’s back catalog, although you would not be blamed for thinking it was. The plot of Chernobyl Diaries is pretty threadbare, but that’s standard for horror movies. It involves four American tourists on holiday in the Ukraine. The infamous Chernobyl nuclear power plant coincidentally also happens to be in Ukraine. You can already guess that someone decides it would be a great idea to sneak into Chernobyl.
The predictable plot isn’t Diaries biggest problem. Horror movies don’t need intricate plots to be effective. A great setting and immersive atmosphere are wonderful tools to help convey a sense of dread and terror. This is the movie’s biggest misfire: it absolutely squanders a terrific setting.
The Chernobyl disaster provides plenty of horror movie potential in a post nuclear fallout atmosphere. Visions of mutant animals and cannibals immediately pop to mind when discussing such a scenario. Whether due to budget restraints or poor judgment, the film absolutely underdelivers in that regard. The majority of the threats to the characters come in the form of wild animals or radiation poisoning. There are mutants, but their appearance is too little and too late. It’s not a good sign when you’re watching a film and imagining various ways in which this movie could be better. Chernobyl Diaries had great potential, but ultimately it falls far short of what it should’ve been.
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Drinking Buddies
Drinking Buddies tells the tale of friendship, beer and lack of ambition. It is a well thought out and executed slice of life that has a lot going on under the surface. I’d compare it to the wonderful beer Innis & Gunn because it is unique, layered and thoroughly enjoyable
It is hard to characterize Drinking Buddies and I like that. It isn’t a romantic comedy or a stereotypical mumblecore film. It is an evolution of both and will certainly not sit well with people looking looking for Friends With Benefits 2. The word “mumblecore” has been thrown around a lot in the reviews for Drinking Buddies. Mumblecore is characterized by low budgets, naturalistic improvisational performances and novice actors. The films are usually shot on digital and the sets are scarce. Drinking Buddies may have the low-budget and naturalistic vibe but it would be a shame to simply categorize it as mumblecore. It is well thought out and that is evident in the way scenes play out.
The film may have an improvisational feel but director Joe Swanberg had 45 pages outlined and had a clear idea of the things that make his characters tick. He describes his directing choices in an interview with Sag Harbor Express:
Silence is big for me. The most directing I do on set is reminding actors that they don’t have to talk all the time. When a camera and lights are pointed at them, I think that there’s a natural instinct for actors to be on, and fill that space. But in regular conversation, there’s quite a bit of listening that happens, and there’s quite a bit of thinking that happens in between something being said to you and your response to it–at least in my conversations.
The movie focuses on Olivia Wilde and Jake Johnson who work at a Chicago brewery. They are close friends who seem like kindred spirits. They eat lunch together at work, go on double dates, drink lots of beer and both are incredibly selfish. They have a naturalism together that is evident in the quiet moments where they probably get a little too close to each other.
Jake Johnson’s character prefers drinking beer to talking about marrying his girlfriend. Olivia Wilde is a whirlwind who does her own thing to her own detriment. Jake lives with his girlfriend (Anna Kendrick) who keeps a nice apartment and respects his love of beer. Wilde’s apartment looks like a trash bomb went off and she spends the majority of her nights at her boyfriends tidy apartment. Both of them will figure things out but they’ll need catalysts to grow up.
There are several moments that show Drinking Buddies is more than an indie experiment of improvisation. For instance, Ron Livingston gives Olivia Wilde a copy of John Updike’s Rabbit, Run. The central character of the book flees when things get too serious. Also, the way Wilde reacts to compliments of her brewery party differ as she talks to friends, acquaintances and her boyfriend. The characters are all self aware but too wrapped up in their own lives to focus on what matters. They live a life where they don’t have to grow up and it shows.
Drinking Buddies is a unique take on male/female friendship that captures the late twenties/early thirties mind set that adults have today. Swanberg’s drinking gamble paid off as Tarantino placed it on his top ten (so far) of the year and the Rotten Tomatoes score is at 82%.
Watch Drinking Buddies. Enjoy Drinking Buddies. Do not try to drink as much as they do.
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Europa Report: A Unique Entry to the Science Fiction Canon
Europa Report is an engrossing science fiction film that focuses on sacrifice for the sake of knowledge. It doesn’t rely on jump scares, evil moon rocks or green men because the tension comes from the unknown. It is about six people making their way to Jupiter’s Europa moon in hopes of finding something beneath the ice.
It is refreshingly earnest in its effort to tell a quality science fiction tale. It adroitly blends fact with fiction and builds towards a memorable finale that is earned and not forced. Europa Report joins Troll Hunter, Chronicle, Paranormal Activity and Blair Witch as quality films that used found footage to their advantage. It also goes out of its way to show how the footage was recovered which is something Apollo 18 failed spectacularly at.
Shot in 19 days in a ridiculously detailed sound stage the creators worked hard for authenticity. Production designer Eugenio Caballero consulted with NASA Jet Propulsion Laboratory and SpaceX to build the most realistic spaceship possible. Europa didn’t have the budget of Gravity but still managed to look believable in a CGI heavy environment.
My favorite aspect is that the script wasn’t lost in the science and detail. Without the script and likable characters the ending would have been wasted and the beautiful sets wouldn’t be fully appreciated. For instance, the instant classic Moon looks fantastic AND is buoyed by a fantastic Sam Rockwell performance. The Science fiction and human element combine to bring the viewer in. Europa succeeds because of its script and performances.
I couldn’t quite single out what made me appreciate this film so much. The world wasn’t ending, a rich old man didn’t want immortality and there were zero hell portals in sight. The director Sebastian Cordero summed it up for me when he talked about his involvement:
One of the reasons I was involved in this film was that this is not a film about a threat. We’re not talking about something coming to get us. … It’s much more about the thrill of discovery — and the natural instinct for human beings to explore.
The crew of the Europa realize the expectations of the 3.6 billion dollar venture. They are adventurers who knowingly risk it all for knowledge. It is moving to see the practical yet insane choices they make in the face of discovery. I should have predicted the writing on the wall when the ship’s pilot Rosa said this:
Compared to the breadth of knowledge yet to be known, what does your life really matter?
It is interesting to watch people make rational decisions that are not about themselves. Sure, in the end their legacy will be secured but it means they are dead. As they land on Europa about 100 meters away from the original target zone they are committed to completing the mission. Yes, bad things will happen but they occur unselfishly and with curious bravado.
Europa Report does something very important. It adds a unique film to the science fiction cannon. If you haven’t watched Moon, Sunshine or Europa Report yet I recommend you check them out now. Turn off the lights. Turn off your phones. Enjoy science fiction done right.
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MY CALL: Overall a fun watch for fans of the franchise, but it’s lost a good bit of the joie de vive that fueled part 2 and made part 1 a breakthrough DTV film. MOVIES LIKE Subspecies III: Hopefully you saw Subspecies (1991) and Subspecies II (1993), and perhaps Subspecies IV (1998). For more pseudoromantic monster movies try Dark Angel: The Ascent (1994) and Bleeders (1997). SIDEBAR: This was filmed back to back with Subspecies II, which follows in the spirit of the franchise by picking up exactly where this movie ends.
Michelle’s sister Becky (Melanie Shatner; The Alien Within, Subspecies III, Star Trek V) narrates as this sequel picks up immediately where Subspecies II left off: After defeating Radu (Anders Hove; Subspecies I-IV, Critters 4), Becky must wait until dark to escape with her vampire sister Michelle (Denice Duff; Subspecies II–IV, Night of the Living Dead 3D: Re-Animation), who is abducted in the final moments by Radu’s “Mummy” (Pamela Gordon; Weird Science, Poltergeist II, Subspecies II, Alien Nation), a crone-like ghoul akin to an unwrapped mummy.
While not holding a candle to the AMAZING opening scene of Subspecies II, Bloodlust opens with a brief, concerted effort at delivering some gore, wincing wrist slicing and face stabs to get us excited in this sequel’s opening. During this scene, Mummy resurrects Radu and the two of them steal Michelle away because, evidently, Michelle and Radu are to be bound together forever. That’s Radu’s idea anyway.
It’s a little early in your relationship to be giving her family heirlooms. Especially when the former owner, your Mummy, is still alive and doesn’t want to give it up! I don’t care if she is 1000 years old.
Yup. Radu, you need to slow your roll. It’s clear you’re way more into this relationship than she is.
Bro, watching her sleep like that…not helping.
“Why won’t you love me?”
With little contribution from Lt. Marin (Ion Haiduc; Subspecies II-IV, Dark Angel: The Ascent, Mimic: Sentinel), Becky and embassy representative Mel (Kevin Spirtas; Friday the 13th Part VII, The Hills Have Eyes Part II, Subspecies II) continue to try to save Michelle for the entire second act of the movie. This portion of the story is slow, unexciting, and hardly informative–it just drags. Meanwhile Mummy whispers poison in Radu’s ear in hopes that he’ll destroy Michelle instead of weaning her away from her ties to mortality. Ignoring the classic adage that “evil witch vampire Mummy knows best,” Radu teaches Michelle to focus her heightened senses, move through the shadows and hunt human prey.
The best part of this movie was when we were finally rid of this worthless character (Marin).
Normally these vampire tutoring/self-realization scenes are great (e.g., Interview with a Vampire, We Are the Night ). But they are just okay and mostly serve to convey Michelle’s eventual disgust for this kind of life.
Mummy gets a of screen time and action in this movie–plus a lot of bickering with her son Radu. Not that I’m not entertained by this, but it made the movie feel less serious and more bonkers, much as the undead Toulon did for Puppet Master II (1991). To that end, the finale didn’t really offer much in the way of action except for Radu’s final moments (which was a cool, but brief death). I find this to be a shame since Subspecies and the first 10 minutes of Subspecies II (in combination) make for a damn fine piece of work making a B+ movie from a B-budget.
Speaking of bonkers: here Mummy has killed a CIA agent (who dresses like a special ops soldier) armed with a machine gun using her knife. She brought a knife to a gunfight and won!
As for the story… This entire film was about Radu’s imaginary romance with Michelle, which was never reciprocated, and Michelle’s acclimation to vampirism. While I understood what the writer/director (Ted Nicolaou) was trying to do, it wasn’t done very effectively. Moreover the subspecies demons, for which this franchise was named, do not even appear until the final few minutes of this film and the bloodstone, for which part 2 was named, played no bigger role in part 2 than in parts 1 or 3.
Part 3 is still overall a fun watch, but it’s lost a good bit of the joie de vive that fueled part 2 and made part 1 a breakthrough DTV film. I’m sorry to say that director Ted Nicolaou (Subspecies I-II, Terror Vision, Puppet Master vs Demonic Toys) lost the inertia that started this franchise so powerfully.
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Grabbers is fun, charming and rewatchable. It is a little Irish film that focuses on villagers who have to stay drunk to stay alive. The best thing about Grabbers is that it is immensely likable and doesn’t become a one-note shlock fest. It follows in the foot steps of Gremlins, Attack the Block and Tremors with its infusion of horror, comedy and oddness. You will cheer for the eventual drunk heroes as they battle ill-tempered aliens.
The story centers around an alien species (locals call them grabbers) running wild in a small Irish town. People are grabbed, laughs are had and the local police find out that alcohol is a reliable deterrent. The story has familiar elements such as the redeemed hero, cute love interest and cheeky town residents. However, these familiar elements are handled well and Richard Coyle, Ruth Bradley and Russel Tovey all add charm to their characters.
Much Like James Wan (Insidious, Conjuring) the director Jon Wright plays with horror conventions and realizes he isn’t reinventing the wheel. He uses familiar tropes with aplomb and this creates a joyously good time involving one-liners, thrills and a guy getting flicked by an alien. Grabbers was created to entertain and it does not disappoint. It is a drunken roller coaster with beautiful Irish scenery.
What I appreciate most is that the film doesn’t simply settle upon it’s interesting/cheeky plot. Writer Kevin Lehane did a fantastic job of building upon the funny idea. There are layers to the characters and there are enough surprises and jokes to keep it chugging along. It is absolutely absurd but it is told with confidence. It you look back at Tremors and Gremlins you will notice outrageous moments are embraced. Characters use poles to leap from rock to rock and furry Gremlins enjoy a night out watching Snow White. There is zero self consciousness to the films and that is why they work.
Check out Grabbers on Netflix. It is an incredibly fun film that wants to entertain. Comment and let me know what you think!
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John’s Horror Corner: Hideous! (1997), it’s not your typical mutant monster fetus movie
MY CALL: Deliberately stupid movie about slimy little monster fetuses and the greedy wealthy eccentrics that collect them. MOVIES LIKE Hideous!: Other fun little ensemble monster movies include Puppet Master (1989), Ghoulies (1985) and Seed People (1992).
Directed/produced by Charles Band (Puppet Master, Dark Angel: The Ascent, Ghoulies, Netherworld) and written by Benjamin Carr (Thirteen Ghosts, Retro Puppet Master, Curse of the Puppet Master), our story begins at a sewage plant where we learn of the occasionally discovered deformed fetuses that represent the theme of this campy little jaunt.
Run by Belinda and her assistant Elvina, International Medical Specimens Inc. specializes in selling these abominations. Dr. Lorca (Demonic Toys: Personal Demons, Cemetery High) and his oft-nearly naked assistant Sheila (Jacqueline Lovell; The Killer Eye, Femalien, Head of the Family) feel betrayed knowing that she is instead brining coveted specimens to Lorca’s competition Napoleon Lazar (Mel Johnson Jr.; Total Recall). Lorca’s darkly colored wardrobe, his sex toy of an assistant and his over-the-top villainous demeanor all intentionally paint him in melodrama that is only matched by his ridiculous lines.
When we meet Napoleon, Belinda showcases her recent acquisition along with a sales pitch demanding a preposterous sum. Enamored with the “specimen” Napoleon bites. But in no time Lorca seizes the specimen by force. So what is this coveted thing? Just another mutant fetus for Lorca to add to his disturbing collection. This fetus somehow survives formaldehyde-preservation and imbues the other three preserved medical oddities in Lorca’s collection with life-and they escape.
They look a little like Sonic, Kuato and Swamp Thing.
Seeking to reclaim his property, Napoleon brings Belinda, Elvina and a hired detective to Lorca’s castle. Once Napoleon (and Lorca) discover that the oddities are no longer in their jars accusations run wild and Sheila triggers an alarm, sealing the castle and trapping everyone inside until they have found Lorca’s specimens. Little do they know that the hideous fetuses are alive and well.
So they (ABOVE) are trapped with them (BELOW).
ABOVE: He looks like Kuato’s cousin from Total Recall!
BELOW: More like an undead PopTart.
These little latex monsters are a lot like Ghoulies. They make similar sounds, they’re somehow always slimy and they each have their own distinct look–one of them looks like an undead Pokémon Sonic the Hedgehog. When all of our greedy human characters first meet these monsters they literally bargain with them (they can’t speak, but understand English just fine and can even write–of course). Lorca and Napoleon vie for their trust, promising them a nice home and a fine life. But things naturally go bad and it ends up being humans versus mutants.
Lunacy abounds in this film. An example of some of the finely written scenes include a topless Sheila in a gorilla mask mugging Napoleon in the middle of Winter. In fact, Sheila is always either topless or wearing an open leather vest with no bra and leather spanks–very classy, always slinking around like the house mother of a vampire brothel. There’s a scene in which one of the monsters gets a little fresh with Elvina while she’s sleeping–also quite tasteful. Oh, and there’s a sword duel between Lorca and Napoleon complete with a random rhyming cheers from Sheila.
Yup. That’s Sheila for you. Actually actress Jacqueline Lovell has done a lot of softcore adult films. So this is actually more than she’s used to in the wardrobe department.
Hungry, little guy?
Nothing about this movie is taken seriously. It is not only overly hammed up, but there are some deliberately stupid/funny lines, making this nonsense far from critically acclaimed but rather entertaining. Just keep your expectations low and it should be fine to kill a Sunday afternoon.
Movies, Films & Flix 