John’s Horror Corner: Ginger Snaps 2: Unleashed (2004)
http://laraandthereelboy.wordpress.com/2011/11/21/cult-classics-ginger-snaps-discussion-part-2-of-3/
MY CALL: A worthy sequel for Ginger Snaps fans. Not nearly as good, but certainly not bad. IF YOU LIKE THIS WATCH: Ginger Snaps (2000). MORE WEREOLF MOVIES: Much Ginger Snaps is a metaphor for puberty, An American Werewolf in Paris (1997) serves as a coming of manhood from college man-childhood. But it’s more of a positive journey. If you’re in the market for another great werewolf movie that has a sense of humor, then see An American Werewolf in London (1981)–hands down the best werewolf movie ever made! Second best might be The Howling (1981), which takes itself quite seriously. Another fun one is Cursed (2005), which is loaded with clichés and honors many past horror flicks. If you want another utterly ridiculous werewolf movie, then move on to Howling II: Your Sister is a Werewolf (1985) and Howling 3: The Marsupials (1987). But skip Howling IV: The Original Nightmare (1988), Howling V: The Rebirth (1989), Howling VI: The Freaks (1991) and The Howling: Reborn (2011).
Remember in Ginger Snaps when Brigitte cuts her hand to “share” Ginger’s fate?
Since the death of her sister Ginger (Katharine Isabelle; Freddy vs Jason, Ginger Snaps, 30 Days of Night: Dark Days), Brigitte (Emily Perkins; Ginger Snaps) has been suppressing her lycanthropy with wolf’s bane injections like a drug addict while resisting Ginger’s taunts haunting her psyche. However, she’s developing a resistance to her herbal remedy and she’s dosing increasingly more often. Then, at about the most inconvenient time, Brigitte is placed in a mental hospital suspected of drug addiction by the tracks on her arm.
http://laraandthereelboy.wordpress.com/2011/11/21/cult-classics-ginger-snaps-discussion-part-2-of-3/
http://laraandthereelboy.wordpress.com/2011/11/21/cult-classics-ginger-snaps-discussion-part-2-of-3/
http://paranoiastrikesdeep.blogspot.com/2011/10/ginger-snaps-twice.html
During group therapy we find some humor as we hear Brigitte’s melodramatic self-prognosis and meet her new catty roommates. But we’ll find far less humor overall in this sequel than the original. Overhearing some hospital staff discussing Brigitte’s strange addiction to wolf’s bane, a young girl nicknamed Ghost with a werewolf comic book and a while imagination begins to suspect Brigitte’s secret.
http://laraandthereelboy.wordpress.com/2011/11/21/cult-classics-ginger-snaps-discussion-part-2-of-3/
Without her wolf’s bane, Brigitte begins to heal more rapidly and slowly transform. But more of a problem than keeping up with her wolf’s bane dosage is another, fully transformed werewolf seeking out Brigitte. Supporting Brigitte through all of this–werewolves and wolf’s bane and mental hospital escapes–Ghost becomes much like a little sister.
http://laraandthereelboy.wordpress.com/2011/11/21/cult-classics-ginger-snaps-discussion-part-2-of-3/
This is a reasonable sequel that continues Brigitte’s story with a very different angle from part one–and none of the puberty/womanhood metaphor. It’s not nearly as good as the original, but it’s a worthy, entertaining sequel. The effects haven’t really graduated from the low budget of part one, maybe even a step back, but the gore is still effective.
http://paranoiastrikesdeep.blogspot.com/2011/10/ginger-snaps-twice.html
http://laraandthereelboy.wordpress.com/2011/11/21/cult-classics-ginger-snaps-discussion-part-2-of-3/
The werewolf looks more different than “better” compared to part one. However, Brigitte’s transformation is far less interesting and punctuated than Ginger’s was. At one point Brigitte looks more like a D-movie ghoul or zombie than someone on her way to wolfdom. That make up was done poorly and represents the most major fault of the movie. There is also no actual transformation scene–which, itself, is another fault of the movie. But it does play well with the ending.
http://paranoiastrikesdeep.blogspot.com/2011/10/ginger-snaps-twice.html
Perhaps the most interesting part of the movie was Ghost’s character development. She has her own dark secret and it becomes rather important in the third act and ending of the story.
If you enjoyed Ginger Snaps then I’d say watch this. It’s not nearly as good but it’s certainly not at all bad.
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MFF News: The Fast 6 & 7 Edition
Hello all. Mark here.
I love the Fast series. It started as a Point Break rip off and became a billion dollar fun factory. Intellectuals, gear heads and most everybody in the world appreciates the genius/ bonkers lengths the series goes to please the fans. For instance, bringing back Han, saying “bruh” a lot and magically killing zero innocent bystanders. It is a balls out insane fest full of huge crashes, long falls and scantily clad women dancing by cars. Fast and the Furious six looks to be taking it up to another level and it looks amazing.
Fast Six explodes onto screens on Memorial day and I cannot wait for many things to crash, Vin Diesel to warble and this scene.
Fast 6 is certain to make a billion dollars so it is no surprise that Fast Seven is moving full steam ahead into production. Vin Diesel announced the theatrical date would be July 11, 2014 and James Wan (insidious, Saw, Conjuring) would be directing . This is exciting news because I love Wan’s films and if it Aint It Cool’s spoiler report about the bad guy is correct Seven will be a wonderful way to finish the most surprisingly lucrative series ever.
Are you excited for the Fast conclusion or is it coming too quickly? Also, I dig these posters but they seem to involve way too much thinking.
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MY CALL: Not good, completely underwhelming, no sense to be made. All the cowbell in the world couldn’t make this better! WHAT TO WATCH INSTEAD: The Farmhouse (2008), House Hunting (2013).
Jack (Reynaldo Rosales; The 4400, Smallville) and Stephanie (Heidi Dippold; Mexican Werewolf in Texas) get lost in Alabama. Their car breaks down in the woods and they wander into a bed and breakfast and meet Randy and Leslie, another couple who also broke down on the same road. Oddly, the dining room is set for four as if they were expected.
This bed and breakfast is run by a VERY strange woman and her VERY off-putting adult sons. VERY clearly, something is not right about these people.
The couples find they are trapped in the house by The Tin Man (Michael Madsen; Species, Piranhaconda), a local deputy and madman. The Tin Man drops a can in the house which contains the “rules of the house,” which demand that there must be one dead body by dawn. The caretaker and her son seem to know about this psychopath, and appear quite crazy themselves.
After an altercation, we learn that the woman may be some sort of demon that bleeds black ectoplasm, that she and her sons are apparently deep into some black magic, and that the house has supernatural properties that taunt each of our four protagonists with the sins and guilt of their past.
As we see how the house manipulates each of them, I find only melodrama, pandemonium and disappointment. Instead of tactfully approaching one person’s past at a time, we simultaneously begin seeing everyone’s past haunt them at once. It feels like a melee of disconnected, unexplained pasts bombarding you one after another like horror-writers’ Turrets syndrome. Many of these scenes come in the form of flashbacks and, not taking place in the house, only reduce their effectiveness.
The Tin Man seems to know these people’s sins and guilt as if he’s some other-worldly dark force. He’s not an effective antagonist and, frankly, the nature of this story does not require an anthropomorphized figure to represent forcing people to face the demons of their past. Overall, the whole premise and the events therein feel completely unrooted and the only good thing about this movie seems to be the lighting.
As the movie wears on, instead of tying things together and making sense of the story and the characters’ pasts, we just get more random things happening and more new elements from their past and weird ways to present them; in short, more weird evil supernatural devices just “happen” as if they fell in the story’s lap by accident. The writer just continues to add supernatural components, but never links them or explains them.
It’s as if this was written as the movie was being created…with the producers and director screaming at the writer “MORE SCARY THINGS!!!” much like a drunk Christopher Walken raving “I gotta’ have more cowbell!!!”
Oh, right, then there’s this weird ghost girl who turns out to be good. She tries to help the couples and acts as an opponent of The Tin Man, challenging his “rules.” Any sense there? No. Just more cowbell. And not the good kind. Oh, and guess what: SPOILER ALERT! The ending sucked, too.
Don’t watch this. There’s not enough cowbell on Earth to save it.
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Bad Movie Tuesday: GI Joe 2: Retaliation
GI Joe 2 is a step back from the absolutely bombastic original which featured Paris being destroyed by green goo, underground labyrinth headquarters and a massive underwater submarine battle. I had ZERO problems with the original and was actually hoping the sequel would approve upon the missteps and make for a HUGE slightly less dumb installment. The early previews were promising and the use of a thumping “Seven Nation Army” remix proved to be exhilarating. However, the movie was postponed 13 months to undergo tinkering (3D conversion, more Tatum) and the final product is about as thrilling as a blindfolded jog through the park.
Sidenote: It took me three installments to watch the original Joe and thus was never able to be fully immersed in the dumbness. This probably helped by keeping the insanity to three 35 minutes segments.
GI Joe 2 is arguably dumber. It feels like a chopped up piece of filmmaking that lacks grand ambition. The plot revolves around world destruction but it feels like a saunter through various locations. The disappointing nature of the film is a true bummer because we here at MFF we expecting grand dumbness and fun loud noises. I wrote about the film more than a year ago (read here) and John reviewed the movie thoroughly here. Also, the MFF crew had the movie figured out before it was released.
GI Joe 2 is bad because you wish it was good. You want things to blow up and then have other things blow up. You want The Rock to punch many people in the face while Snake Eyes engages in mountain sword fights with dangerous ninjas. All of this happens but there is zero story behind it. People pop up in random locations for no reason and when the action erupts you can’t help but think about better films like Fast Five, The Rundown or Battleship. These three movies knew what they were and had competent directors guiding the action. Imagine the film that Peter Berg would have directed with this poster below (he has brass knuckles on his gun). Berg worked with The Rock before (Rundown) and it was a blast of fun action
The best part of this film is Walton Goggins (Justified). He plays a warden that is holding Storm Shadow, Cobra Commander and Destro in his prison. The prison is attacked by a very angry Ray Stevenson and Walton puts up one heck of a fight. His scenes are so random and unexpected that they make you perk up a bit and appreciate the unknown happening in front of you. He is a little fella who is doing the best he can to not die, be annoying and deliver minor aches and pains to the evil bad guys. He shocks Storm Shadow with a defibrillator paddle, blows up a fuel tank and survives several gun shots. The dude is not a quitter and his actions make for the best moments of GI Joe 2. I’d love to see a film where he and Storm Shadow team up in an episode of Justified and battle Raylan Givens. It would never happen but it would be pretty great. Also, if you haven’t watched Byung-hun Lee in the bonkers film I Saw the Devil watch it now.
GI Joe 2 revolves around three Joes trying to fight the evil Cobra nation. The Rock, Adrianne Palicki and DJ Catone glower and flex their way through various action scenes and eventually save the world. Joining them are Snake Eyes, Jinx and Bruce Willis as Bruce Willis. The dialogue feels forced and it is a shame to see so many good actors wasted. I am a huge Friday Night Lights fan and was stoked to see Palicki in a bug budget tentpole but she is restricted to wearing workout clothes, sleeveless fatigues and slinky red dresses. She is a great actress yet the director had no idea what to do with her. She fills the void left by Sienna Miller’s leather clad Baroness
GI Joe 2 is not better than the first film. The Rise of Cobra had an epic scale that felt like a sugar rush to the head (super suits, lasers, destruction of France). This film drags on a bit and can’t match the promise of the first trailer. I feel like there is a lot on the cutting room floor that didn’t make it into the final cut. There is proof of this during the credits where they show minutes of unused footage that looks pretty cool. I’m hoping there is an uber cut out there that answers some questions and allows for more face punching. G.I. Joe is not a bad film. However, it should have been much more. Hopefully, the inevitable sequel puts it all together.
Don’t go to this Joe. Watch Fast Five, The Rundown or Battleship instead.
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John’s Horror Corner: House Hunting (2013)
MY CALL: All sorts of weird surround this pleasantly surprising hidden gem of a surreal cabin movie. IF YOU LIKE THIS WATCH: The Cabin in the Woods (2012), The Farmhouse (2008).
Charlie (Marc Singer; The Beastmaster, Beastmaster 2), Don (Art LaFleur; The Rig, Hostage) and their families (wives and two teenagers) both happen to be house hunting when their paths cross as they come upon a lonely house in the woods. Both men find the lonely house in the pristine land appealing, but the mood immediately changes when they stumble across a strange, battered, terrified young lady (Rebekah Kennedy; Season of the Witch, Creature) with her tongue cut out running in the woods from something. In an attempt to drive her to a hospital they find that the road continues to somehow return them to the house. Again and again they drive away from the house only to be returned by some supernatural force.
Forced to stay in the house overnight, their sanity is tested and they begin to lose patience with one another. There is no electricity, it’s cold, and they find seven cans of “stew” in a cupboard–and there’s seven of them. Weird yet? It gets weirder. They see a strange man walking his dog who somehow disappears in front of them before they could ask him about the house and the next morning the cupboard has been somehow restocked with seven cans of stew. Don’s son Jason insists that the strange tongueless girl knows what’s going on or, worse, that she is behind it somehow.
Days go by, stew is restocked, and attempts to leave on foot continue to return them to the house. Another oddity is Jason, who taunts and comes on to Charlie’s daughter and is clearly attracted to her stepmother as well. Yet more weird, they start seeing other people that simply “aren’t there.” This begins to steer character psychology and interactions.
As they do what they can to keep their limited sanity, passing time in the house, they learn that some of them are connected to the previous owners. But as the days wear on, the number of stew cans restocked in the cupboard drops to six and things continue to get weirder.
This film never seems to go anywhere, yet it has no problem maintaining my interest. This is one of those weird movies that keeps you guessing while giving you nothing. There’s not a lot of blood, but there’s a lot to keep our attention.
Give this film a shot. I was pleasantly surprised by this little gem.
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John’s Old School Horror Corner: The Burning (1981)
MY CALL: This was a great, campy, classic slasher movie which served as a teen, sex-driven comedy when blood wasn’t being spilled. I highly recommend it. IF YOU LIKE THIS WATCH: If you like laughs with your horror then watch The Cabin in the Woods (2012), Final Destination 5 (2011), Tucker and Dale vs Evil (2010), Drag Me to Hell (2009), and of course Evil Dead 2 (1987) and The Evil Dead (1981).
An 80s slasher-horror that takes place at a summer camp. Yeah, I think I’ve seen it before–Sleepaway Camp (1983, and three sequels), Friday the 13th (1980, plus nine sequels, a Freddy crossover and a remake). But don’t skip this with that notion in mind.
In many of these movies the killer is “made” by the mistreatment of campers; Angela was teased before killing the campers and staff at Sleepaway Camp, Jason Voorhees drowned while over-sexed lifeguards were smoking pot and making out at Crystal Lake. Our killer is made when a prank goes terribly wrong. Some teens thought it would be funny to scare the camp caretaker by placing a burning skull next to his bed for him to wake up to. When he awakens, shocked, he knocks over the skull which catches his bed (and him) on fire and he’s horribly burned–hence the title.
This is our killer, Cropsy. Don’t cry for him. His “before” picture was nothing special either.
After five years of treatment and skin grafts he is released from the hospital. This is a rather elaborate treatment considering that when we see his face in the end, it looks like someone just dumped water on him and left him for dead with a face looking like a melted candle. The first thing he does is kill just about the ugliest hooker in New York. This could probably be considered a public service.
Meanwhile, back at camp, we meet some horny teenagers including a young, scene-stealing Jason Alexander. These campers were in no way connected to the misdeeds of our killer’s mutilation, but that doesn’t stop him from killing a bunch of them simply because their counselor was one of the prankster’s who wronged him. This counselor seems like a great guy now, though. That is, until, he demonizes him in a true campfire tale of his mutilation.
To answer your question: “no.” Jason Alexander wasn’t even thin as a teenager.
It takes about an hour for the horror to start. Until then it feels like an entertaining, raunchy teen camp R-comedy movie. But when it does start it’s fun. I mean, the guy is slaughtering teenagers with hedge sheers–I have no clue where he got them. So be ready for some slashing, throat-stabbing and finger-clipping goodness. The corpse and prosthetics effects were done well for the time.
And now for a gore montage…
We get all of the typical campiness in this camp-horror classic. Consistent with the time, we get bouncy bra-less breasts, extremely short shorts, sex scenes, skinny-dipping and shower scenes–there’s a lot of nudity. The teen campers talk about sex (constantly) and smoke cigarettes in between lines of raunchy dialogue. When they’re not smoking in between talking about climbing on top of each other naked, they’re climbing on top of each other naked.
To this end, I would warn folks away from watching this with preteen fledgling horror fans who can handle most R-rated horror. The sexuality is inescapable and there are many scenes in which the guys get way to pushy with unwilling girls. No rape or anything, but it’d be enough to make you uncomfortable around younger viewers. That, and again, a LOT of nudity.
It looks like that shirt was painted on. She actually looks less naked in the shower than she does in that shirt.
This was a great, campy, classic slasher movie which served as a teen, sex-driven comedy when blood wasn’t being spilled. I highly recommend it.
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John’s Horror Corner: Puppet Master 5 (1994)
http://horrorelhorror.blogspot.com/2012/02/puppet-master-5-puppet-master-5-final.html
MY CALL: Part 5 marks the most noticeable drop in quality of any other franchise installments and is the first of the series that I might suggest you skip. It’s just more of part 4 with almost none of the fun. IF YOU LIKE THIS WATCH: Puppet Master (1989), Puppet Master II (1991; the most slapstick crazy of the first three), Puppet Master III (1991) and Puppet Master 4 (1993). Also try Ghoulies (1985) and Ghoulies II (1988). SEQUEL SIDEBAR: Puppet Master III (1991; set in 1941 and having the highest production value of the first three franchise installments) is actually a prequel to Puppet Master (1989), which occurs decades later in present day and is seamlessly followed story-wise by Puppet Master II (1991; which was the least serious, most zany installment). Puppet Master 4 (1993) returns us to present day after Puppet Master II. Part 5 picks up right where part 4 ended.
In Puppet Master 4, B-horror sequel director Jeff Burr (Pumpkinhead II: Blood Wings, Leatherface: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre III, Stepfather 2) introduced us to a silly new villain and an even sillier premise: some netherworld demon lord named Sutec was sending gremlins after the now-turned-good puppets and anyone who knew their secret of eternal life. The movie ended with a blatant revelation to the audience that a sequel was planned before this movie even hit the shelves. So, with part 5, the story continues.
http://horrorelhorror.blogspot.com/2012/02/puppet-master-5-puppet-master-5-final.html
Dumb scene.
Robot and artificial intelligence engineer Rick (Gordon Currie; Friday the 13th Part VIII, The Terror Within II, Puppet Master 4), now wrongly charged with the murders of his friends and co-workers, reviews the events of Puppet Master 4 wherein he learned about Andre Toulon (Guy Rolfe; Puppet Master III, Puppet Master 4 and Retro Puppet Master, Dolls, The Bride), reanimation, the demon lord Sutec and the puppets.
http://horrorelhorror.blogspot.com/2012/02/puppet-master-5-puppet-master-5-final.html
Dumb demon lord.
As Rick makes bail and rejoins his girlfriend Susie (Chandra West; White Noise, Puppet Master 4), Sutec is reanimating his apparently dead demon “son” in a ritual that intermittently eats up the first 30 minutes of the movie, metaphysicist and psychic-channeler Lauren (Teresa Hill; Puppet Master 4) is in critical condition in the hospital and sending telepathic instant messages to Rick’s computer, and the guy who bailed Rick out of jail leads a team of goons to find the puppets so that they can profit from them. It all moves along pretty slow (unlike all of the other Puppet Master installments).
http://horrorelhorror.blogspot.com/2012/02/puppet-master-5-puppet-master-5-final.html
Dumb demon lord’s son.
The goons looking for the puppets provide the kill fodder in this movie. They encounter puppets who pick them off and hit them in the nuts with meat tenderizers, and find nether-gremlin demons which suck their souls in the name of Sutec. We also see Sutec’s “child,” which is really just another gremlin but with a necklace and the added ability to teleport (I suppose) through solid objects. This little fiend seems hardly more menacing than the gremlins from Puppet Master 4.
The puppets featured in this movie include Pinhead, Tuneler and Jester (all five movie veterans), Six-Shooter (from parts 1 and 4), Torch (from part 3, but strangely not part 4) and Decaptiron (from part 4), who gets a brand new head attachment and continues to deliver Toulon’s awkward messages from beyond the grave–I think. However, I’m confused as to whether Toulon is a spirit, or still reanimated from part 2, or what. We saw him skulking around the hotel in part 4, but also sending his spiritual messages through Decapitron. Hmmm?
http://horrorelhorror.blogspot.com/2012/02/puppet-master-5-puppet-master-5-final.html
Torch returns!
http://horrorelhorror.blogspot.com/2012/02/puppet-master-5-puppet-master-5-final.html
Jester and Pinhead
http://horrorelhorror.blogspot.com/2012/02/puppet-master-5-puppet-master-5-final.html
Jester, Blade and Torch
http://horrorelhorror.blogspot.com/2012/02/puppet-master-5-puppet-master-5-final.html
Toulon…or Decapitron…both? Eh, screw it!
The final showdown between the puppets and the sorcery-wielding son of Sutec is nothing special. Although, Six-Shooter gets some great stop-motion gun slinging action. They aimed for a climax, but any cartoon episode pitting Mum-Ra against the Thundercats would prove much more exciting. The closing scene is similarly cheesy and lame.
Eh, you could skip it. I love a lot of lame horror and I barely got through this. However, I did it without the entertainment support of friends and beer.
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John’s Old School Horror Corner: The Possessed (1975)
MY CALL: This film is purely ludicrous and should only interest horror fans because of its obscurity. IF YOU LIKE THIS WATCH: If you like random and obscure horror movies then I’d suggest The Nesting (1981), The Outing (1987), Deadly Blessing (1981) and The Sentinel (1977). ALTERNATE TITLE: Demon Witch Child.
http://killer–kittens.blogspot.com/2008/07/demon-witch-child-specializing-in.html
A bald gypsy woman is arrested for kidnapping a child and, for reasons beyond my comprehension, she jumps out the window to her death. Evidently to avenge her mother, the gypsy’s witch daughter curses the daughter of the police commissioner. She gives the girl a figurine and a necklace which seem to allow the ghost of the dead gypsy to enter her body.
http://killer–kittens.blogspot.com/2008/07/demon-witch-child-specializing-in.html
There’s a dumb levitation scene which seems to serve no purpose other than to confirm to the audience that, yes, she is indeed possessed. The possessed little girl acts out the maligned misdeeds of the gypsy by sacrificing an infant, speaking obscenities, unconvincingly twisting her torso 360 degrees, loving Lucifer, engaging in a lot of telekinetic nonsense around the house, strangling people, a random castration, mimicking people’s voices, baby snatching, holding evil gypsy witch meetings.
It’s all rather melodramatic and boring. Very boring. The story doesn’t seem to have any aim as we watch the possessed girl carry out one sin after another. In the end a priest burns a crucifix on her forehead and she falls impaled on a big cross. Nobody wins, especially not the viewers.
http://killer–kittens.blogspot.com/2008/07/demon-witch-child-specializing-in.html
http://killer–kittens.blogspot.com/2008/07/demon-witch-child-specializing-in.html
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Welcome to the Punch
Welcome to the Punch is a stylish cops and robbers film that looks great and allows Mark Strong (Tinker Tailor, The Guard, Kick-Ass, Zero Dark Thirty, Sunshine) to add another badass character to his resume. Director Eran Creevy wanted to make a British film that had the feel of American crime classics like Heat or Goodfellas. In Welcome to the Punch Creevy has made London a character in the film but fails to make anybody else very interesting. There is a lot of bluster and angry looks amongst the blue hue, cool gunfights and stylish shots.
Creevy made a name for himself with the 2008 micro-budget film Shifty. He showed some promise and got himself on Ridley Scott’s radar. Now he has a plethora of character actors shooting their way through London. James McAvoy, Mark Strong, Peter Mullan, David Morrissey, Andrea Rishborough and Jason Flemyng all have suitable swagger to fit in the high stakes world of robbery, death and looking cool.
The film opens with a robbery followed by a car chase followed by James McAvoy getting shot in the knee by Mark Strong. Some time later Mark Strong’s son falls into some danger and everyone converges to a violent climax. Of course, there is a police conspiracy and the bad guy turns out to be not that bad.
Welcome to the Punch wanted to have a unique look and make London sexy. The film succeeded but it doesn’t make too much else interesting. It is empty calories full of archetypes and not full blown characters. For instance, I wanted to know more about McAvoy’s and Riseborough’s relationship. They have a brief moment of strong chemistry and then it is over. I don’t need anything spelled out for me but a bit of back story helps me identify with the characters.
Welcome to the Punch looks great and shows promise for Eran Creevy. However, for his third film I hope he manages to focus more on the characters that inhabit his beautiful looking worlds.
Watch Welcome to the Punch. Appreciate the Strong. Enjoy the blue hue.
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MY CALL: Avoid this at all costs! “F” IF YOU LIKE THIS WATCH: Other utterly awful dream-driven movies include Nightwish (1990) and Dreamaniac (1986).
Within the first few minutes I knew I was in for something awful. The gore is laughable, but I think the effects people knew it and had a little fun with it. The director also knew how bad this was. He must have when he called for nudity before the 10 minute mark, right?
Alex has been having stupid nightmares about dismemberment, flaying, disembowelment, being burned alive and monster claws. When he starts to catch fire and levitate during his dreams, his friends become a bit concerned.
Brothers Richard and Alex, their girlfriends (including Hope Marie Carlton; Ghoulies 3: Ghoulies Go to College), their roommates and a psychic professor venture to Alcatraz to stop the evil spirit that has been reaching out to Alex. I hardly get why, though. In the movie, they reveal that the spirit can’t cross the water from Alcatraz island. So why would you bring Alex to the evil? Stupid movie, stupid plot–that’s the most logical answer I can imagine.
While in Alcatraz the ghost of a female heavy metal band lead singer who died during a tour of Alcatraz tries to help by offering Alex advice. This is just weird and full of stupid dialogue. The other weird thing that happens is that Richard is possessed and turns into a demon cannibal rapist, which is stupid, tasteless, and yet another lame excuse to add more gratuitous nudity. In order to combat evil-rapist Richard, the metal singer ghost chick helps Alex to leave his body (via Astral Projection or something) by doing some retarded dance number.
So this dance will help some wimp fight his evil-possessed bro.
Cannibal Richard picks off his friends one by one as they try to escape from Alcatraz. There is only one interesting moment to boast in the entire movie. That’d be when possessed Richard punches right through a guy’s head. We see everything, it made me smile, but sadly after that we returned to the crappy norm of this flick.
Clearly ripping off An American Werewolf in London, every killed victim walks Alcatraz as a ghoulish restless spirit heckling Alex to put an end to evil Richard’s mayhem. Along with that, other ill-attempts of humor are made, but they all far short of a grin.
Playboy Playmate Hope Marie Carlton as a restless spirit
The “music” sucks in this abysmally budgeted 80s horror. The editing is destitute, too–almost distractingly bad. Wooden acting, a terrible story, a stupid evil spirit monster…there wasn’t anything about this movie that didn’t suck. Even the gratuitous nudity sucked.
Movies, Films & Flix 
