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The MFF podcast is back, and this week Chris Kelly (of the Classic American Movies podcast) joined us to discuss the cult classic film Liquid Sky. Released in 1982, and directed by Slava Tsukerman, this funky science fiction film tells the story of a model named Margaret (Anne Carlisle) dealing with aliens, terrible people, and drugs. In this episode, we discuss massive shrimp dinners, fun dancing, and cheeky dialogue. Also, make sure to listen to the interview Chris had with writer/star Anne Carlisle, it’s a lot of fun.
If you are a fan of the podcast make sure to send in some random listener questions so we can do our best to not answer them correctly. We thank you for listening, and hope you enjoy the episode!
You can download the pod on Apple Podcasts, Tune In, Podbean,or Spreaker.
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MFF Special: Analyzing Adam Sandler’s Films to Create a Perfectly Terrible Sandler Film
Quick note: I recently put this up on Reddit and it got a huge response so I decided to share it here too.
Last year, Adam Sandler was a guest on Howard Stern’s show to discuss his starring role in the excellent Uncut Gems. During the interview, Sandler made a joke about what would happen if he didn’t win the Best Actor Academy Award. He told Howard:
“If I don’t get it, I’m going to f–king come back and do one again that is so bad on purpose just to make you all pay. That’s how I get them.”
In a bad news, bad news situation, Sandler wasn’t nominated, and he’s promised to make a terrible film (I’ll still watch it a few times regardless). In an effort to assist the Sandman with his terrible film, I dug through all of his films and analyzed their posters to come up with the objectively worst Sandler picture that could be made. Here it is:
- Jacked Up
- Directed by Dennis Dugan
- Written By – Tim Herlihy
- PG-13
- Running Time: 135 minutes
- Released on Netflix
- Predicted Tomatometer score – 6%
- Predicted IMDb score – 3.75
Adam Sandler plays a personal trainer/shoe salesman named Jack Goodheart who is married to Janet Goodheart (Also, Sandler, using a very off-putting voice). They travel to an exclusive resort in Costa Rica to attend his 30th high school anniversary during the fourth of July weekend. During the event, Rob Schneider (playing a terrorist) and his team of henchmen, hijack the event and take everyone hostage, including State Senator Chuck Finley (Terry Crews) and presidential candidate Casey Fitzpatrick (Maya Rudolph). During the melee, Jack and Janet escape, and the two use their past military experience and buff physiques to save the day. This PG-13 action-comedy is entitled “Jacked Up” and ends with a jet ski chase at the hotel’s lazy river pool that circles the hotel. The film is directed by Dennis Dugan, and co-stars Kevin James, Chris Rock, David Spade, Salma Hayek, Terry Crews, Steve Buscemi, Taylor Lautner, Luke Wilson, Peter Dinklage, Maya Rudolph, and Al Pacino.
This is how I came up with the storyline. I pulled together his best and worst films to find patterns that appear. Here are Sandler’s lowest rated films on Rotten Tomatoes and IMDb. I drew a lot of inspiration from them. Also, I tried to make this as objective as possible.
- The Ridiculous 6 (0% TM) – Action Comedy – Action hero
- Jack and Jill (3% – 3.3 IMDb) – Two Sandler’s – Jet Ski scene – Married – Holiday
- Grown Ups 2 (7%) – Reunited with old friends – Married
- Bulletproof (8%) – Action comedy
- The Cobbler (9%) – Shoe repairman
- The Do-Over (10%) – Action Comedy – Reunited with old friend – Married
- Grown Ups (10%) – Reunited with old friends – Holiday – Married
- Adam Sandler’s Eight Crazy Nights (12%)– Takes place during a holiday
- Blended (14%) – He’s a dad who travels to Africa
- Going Overboard (1.8 IMDb) – Lots of terrible boat action
- The Week Of (5.1 IMDb) families get together for a wedding
- Sandy Wexler (5.1 IMDb) – Sandler pulls a unique voice (which isn’t statistically a good thing
Here’s all I research I compiled to create Jacked Up
- A trademark of Sandler’s latest movies is that he likes to travel to beautiful locations to film (which is brilliant, and why not?). The Do-Over, Just Go With It, Blended, Grown Ups 1 & 2 and Murder Mystery are examples of his penchant for travel. The problem is, the films have a lower Tomatometer average (21.2%) than the films where he didn’t travel to nice locations (37.4%). This is why he travels in Jacked Up.
- Sandler has several directors that he enjoys working with. Those Directors are Steven Brill, Dennis Dugan and Frank Coraci. Steven Brill (20%) has a lower Tomatometer average than Dennis Dugan (24%) and Frank Coraci (30%). However, Dugan is responsible for Jack & Jill, so I’m giving him the director’s chair. He did direct Happy Gilmore, so this could backfire on me. Frank Coraci directed The Ridiculous 6, but, I love the baseball scene and he also directed The Waterboy and The Wedding Singer.
- Aside from You Don’t Mess With the Zohan (which is brilliant, and has a fun jet ski action scene), His action comedies are lackluster. Bulletproof (8%) and The Do-Over (9%) didn’t win him many points. That’s why Jacked Up features an action-centered plot.
- His films featuring him as a married man have a 29% Tomatometer average. Movies featuring him as a single man have a 38% Average. Thus, the marriage to himself (think Jack & Jill) is included. It’s a double whammy
- I picked Tim Herlihy to write because he wrote The Ridiculous Six, Grown Ups 2 and Pixels (8% average). I do love his Happy Gilmore, Billy Madison, The Wedding Singer and The Waterboy scripts though
- His PG-13 (29%) rated films have a lower Tomatometer average than his R (51%) and PG-rated (45%) films. For Netflix, M rating = R and TV-14 = PG-13
- I included a pool because in Airheads he is a pool cleaner who thinks about swimming pools. Also, Grown Ups, The Do-Over, Jack and Jill feature swimming pools. They have low scores.
- Movies that feature Sandler doing a voice have a lower Tomatometer score (24.8%) than his regular voiced roles (36%).
- None of his Fresh films feature a jet ski – 50 first Dates (45%), Jack & Jill (3%) and You Don’t Mess with the Zohan (37%) are all Rotten
- In The Ridiculous Six, Grown Ups, The Do-Over, and Bulletproof he plays a totally capable man who isn’t an underdog like he is in Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore. So, he can’t be a doofus during the action scenes.
- Randomly enough, Rob Schneider shouldn’t adopt some kind of stereotyped character because his makeup-less roles have a lower Tomatometer average (27.6%) than his stereotyped roles (32%).
- His lowest rated movies on IMDb are Going Overboard (1.5), Jack & Jill (3.3), The Ridiculous 6 (4.8), Sandy Wexler (5.1) and The Week Of (5.1) – These movies feature water exploits, gun fights, weird voices, two Sandlers, and large gatherings. These things are all in Jacked Up.
- *Bulletproof (*$25 million), Little Nicky ($39 million) and Blended ($46 million) are a few of his lowest grossing comedies. In these films, he uses a wild voice, goes on vacations and engages in action shenanigans. I left out movies like Spanglish and Reign Over Me because they aren’t traditional Sandler comedies. Also, Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore weren’t huge earners. However, they established him as a force of nature.
- His first or last name couldn’t begin with an “R” – Howard Ratner (Uncut Gems), Henry Roth (50 First Dates), Robbie Hart (The Wedding Singer).
WHAT DOES THE POSTER NEED TO LOOK LIKE?
- He cannot be centered on the poster. His best films Punch Drunk Love, Happy Gilmore, Funny People and Uncut Gems feature him centered on the poster. The Wedding Singer, Reign Over Me and The Meyerowitz Stories don’t have him centered. However, the movie posters that have centered have a 48% Tomatometer Average. The Posters that have him on the left have a 30% Tomatometer average. I’m going with that.
He is rarely centered in his worst movies.
- There needs to be multiple people on the poster. When Sandler is alone on a poster, his movies have a 42% Tomatometer average. The movie posters with 4+ people have a 20% Tomatometer average. More is good.
- In this poster he needs to be holding something random. In The Cobbler poster he is holding a coffee cup (this is important) and the movie has an 8% Tomatometer score. In The Wedding Singer (microphone) and Happy Gilmore (golf club) and The Waterboy (bucket, helmet) he is holding items related to his character. He needs to be holding something weird (like a can of sponsored coca-cola). Also, the posters that feature him holding an item (31%) have a lower Tomatometer score than the posters featuring him not holding anything (42%).
- It’s best if his entire body is on the poster. The movie posters featuring a full-bodied Adam Sandler have a lower Tomatometer average (31%) than his partial body posters (43%).
- Ideally, the title would be in the center, because Jack & Jill and The Ridiculous Six have somewhat centered titles.
Poster
- Title centered
- Sandler(s) on left side – Full body
- At least six other characters on the poster
- He needs to be holding something that has nothing to do with his charcter
There you have it! I can’t wait to watch Jacked Up.
Click on the MFF data tab to see more of my dumb data!
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The Jim Jarmusch directed The Dead Don’t Die is an underappreciated zombie comedy that features coffee zombies, a samurai sword yielding Tilda Swinton, and copious mentions of Night of the Living Dead. The film was met with mixed reactions when it was released in 2019, so, we wanted to record this episode to promote its excellence and hopefully get more eyes on it. This small scale zombie film focuses on the “chaotic” events that unfold in a small town named Centerville (it’s in the center of a map we see later) that is overrun by zombies who crave material goods and flesh. In this episode we discuss dust zombies, tiny cars, and Adam Driver saying “ghouls.” Enjoy!
If you are a fan of the podcast make sure to send in some random listener questions so we can do our best to not answer them correctly. We thank you for listening, and hope you enjoy the episode!
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MY CALL: If you’re looking for a lot of dumb cheesy fun with gore and evil flying go-for-the-throat fish violence, then you have found your Eden. And if that was somehow not specific enough for you to know if you want to see this movie, then it’s probably not for you. MORE MOVIES LIKE Piranha II: The Spawning: Piranha 3D (2010) or Piranha 3DD (2012) continue to amplify the campy, raunchy, extra cheesy and chunky gory spirit of this sequel.
NATURAL HORROR SIDEBAR: Looking for more natural horror? Check out Night of the Lepus (1972), Frogs (1972), Bug (1975), Jaws (1975), Food of the Gods (1976), Grizzly (1976), Squirm (1976), Empire of the Ants (1977), Day of the Animals (1977), Orca (1977), Piranha (1978), Alligator (1980), Of Unknown Origin (1983), Cujo (1983), Razorback (1984), Monkey Shines (1988), Slugs (1988), Food of the Gods II (1989), Shakma (1990), Arachnophobia (1990), Ticks (1993), Mosquito (1994), The Ghost in the Darkness (1996), Anaconda (1997), Lake Placid (1999), Rogue (2007), Pig Hunt (2008), Chaw (2009), The Grey (2011), The Bay (2012), The Shallows (2016), 47 Meters Down (2017), Boar (2017) and Crawl (2019).
In terms of overall production value, this is a big step up from Piranha (1978). The opening scenes depict a pair of scuba divers investigating sunken ship wreckage and engaging in an underwater sex scene before discovering saltwater piranhas! The shots of the attacking piranhas show much more of the creatures than part 1, and much more of the results of their swarming flesh-gauging attacks.
Our first glimpse of a flesh-stripped corpse looks great, but it’s even better (although super cheesy) when a flying fish piranha emerges from the corpse’s gaping guts to kill yet its next victim.
Working for a beachside Caribbean island resort, Anne (Tricia O’Neil) is the scuba tour instructor for the tourists. When a mangled body is found in the water with no good explanation of the cause of death, she teams up with a biochemist (pretending to be a tourist) to investigate what’s going on. But it turns out this biochemist is linked to the experiments of the first movie! Adding more conflict, Anne’s ex-husband is the police chief (Lance Henriksen; Pumpkinhead, Harbinger Down, Aliens, AVP, The Pit and the Pendulum) and he suspects she is somehow involved in the killings.
The frequency of flying piranha attacks increases yet somehow there is never any evidence of their existence as bizarrely mutilated bodies stack up. Meanwhile, these fish seriously look evil. Like, I think they inspired the Gates to Hell spectral fish in Freddy’s Dead (1991).
As mentioned before, director James Cameron (The Terminator, The Abyss, Aliens, True Lies) brought this sequel a serious bump in production value… but also a major increase in shredded gory cheese. The gory grand finale comes as the island resort vacationers approach the beach after midnight for the grunion run. But now genetically crossed with flying fish, the piranhas aerially assault the resort patrons. And these flying piranhas (like attack dogs) always seem to go for the throat for the most gruesome bloody death possible!
If you’re looking for a lot of dumb cheesy fun with gore and evil flying go-for-the-throat fish violence, then you have found your Eden.
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Listen to the MFF Final Fights podcast on Spreaker, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, Podbean or Google Podcasts (or wherever you listen to podcasts)!
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The final fight between Jack Traven (Keanu Reeves) and Howard Payne (Dennis Hopper) in Speed takes place atop a speeding train and ends with a gnarly decapitation due to a very sturdy light. Not many people remember this fight, because when thinking about Speed, the majority of the attention is focused on the beautiful bus stunts and chemistry between Reeves and Sandra Bullock. This underappreciated brawl features decapitations, excessive screaming and a one-liner that requires too much thinking (I love it though). In this episode, we discuss sturdy lights, excessive action and the speed of Dennis Hopper. Enjoy!
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The Movies, Films and Flix Podcast #280: Ford v Ferrari, Wrench Fights, and Racing Movies
You can download the pod on Apple Podcasts, Tune In, Podbean, or Spreaker (or wherever you listen to podcasts…..we’re almost everywhere).
If you get a chance please make sure to review, rate and share. You are awesome!
If you are a fan of the podcast make sure to send in some random listener questions so we can do our best to not answer them correctly. We thank you for listening, and hope you enjoy the episode!
The MFF podcast is back, and this week we’re talking a movie that is perfect in every way. Ford v Ferrari is a beautiful film that focuses on the rivalry between Ford and Ferrari that took place in the 1960s. Directed by James Mangold (Logan, 3:10 to Yuma) and starring Matt Damon (who is so good people don’t know how good he is) and Christian Bale (same) , this Oscar nominated movie made $225 million worldwide, and has a 92% Tomatometer score and an 8.1 IMDb score (and I think it’s still underrated). In this episode, we discuss racing movies (listen to our Rush, Days of Thunder and Driven episodes), throwing wrenches, and the sliminess of Josh Lucas. Enjoy!
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John’s Horror Corner: Killer Tongue (1996; aka La Lengua Asesina), a wacky horror comedy ripping off Species (1995).
MY CALL: A super low budget Species (1995) rip that throws in a lot zany but maybe not enough effects, gore and death. MORE MOVIES LIKE Killer Tongue: Looking for more horror scenes with clever tongue assaults? Then you want Ghoulies (1985), A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984), Freddy’s Revenge (1985) and part 3: Dream Warriors (1987), Tremors (1990), Species (1995) and The Hazing (2004).
After committing a heist, Candy (Melinda Clarke; Spawn, Return of the Living Dead 3) hides out in a nunnery with her four poodles while her boyfriend (Jason Durr) serves his time for the crime. Awaiting his release, Candy is exposed to a meteorite fragment which transforms her into an alien hybrid with a monstrous tongue and her poodles become (and I really don’t see how or why) human drag queens who serve her.
Candy now has not only a dangerous chameleon-like tongue, but her naked body is black (like someone painted her skin black or a latex body suit) along with some other odd changes. And most unusually, the tongue seems to have an alien mind of its own, and it is predatory and hungry.
A year after the release of Species (1995), it’s easy to see what influenced the first kill—and perhaps Candy’s entire transformation. She plunges her prehensile tongue down someone’s throat and it bursts out the other side. Whereas her poodles-turned-human seem more inspired by Earth Girls Are Easy (1988) crossed with RuPaul’s Drag Show (2009-2020/current).
The zaniness of this movie graduates as Candy tries to “kill” her tongue, and her tongue attacks her back! The tongue also does some sexually interesting things in some hokey scenes, and has some goofy conversations with its unwilling host.
The lunacy continues as we meet a mute nun who gets a sexy meteorite makeover. This now-ex-nun steals Candy’s boyfriend and helps him thwart the prison warden (Robert Englund; A Nightmare on Elm Street, Galaxy of Terror, Hatchet II, The Phantom of the Opera) and his lackie (Doug Bradley; Hellraiser I-VIII, Wrong Turn 5, Nightbreed, Pumpkinhead III), who have been tracking him since his escape.
I was expecting something suuuuper raunchy like BioSlime (2010). But this is more akin to the outward horror comedy stylings of Blood Diner (1987) or Bloodsucking Pharaohs from Pittsburgh (1991), but lacking the matching levels of gore. There’s a lot of mild fun to be had here. But I’d complain that there wasn’t enough killer tongue in this killer tongue movie. I mean, there was a lot of the tongue, but it didn’t do enough direct killing. Perhaps writer and director Alberto Sciamma (Black Plague) just needed more of a budget to make that happen. Dare I say it, but had they one less horror icon in a minor role, they may have afforded such messier, gorier and more numerous death scenes.
This is moderately entertaining. It’s a fun B-movie effort and lots of really dumb comedy, as well as perhaps just enough gore and special effects to make it passable. Sure, there’s some tongue strangulation and decapitation. But this packed less gore than I’d expect from something like this. Then again, we have some exploding bodies and a gunshot-exploded head and all sorts of other shenanigans. Maybe this had all it really needed to be entertaining enough. I guess I just wanted more different methods of tongue-driven death.
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MY CALL: Exactly what an 80s sequel to a 70s classic should be: much more gory and zany. Good gore, not scary at all but very fun horror, and with cool visuals of giant rats. Why… what were you expecting? MORE MOVIES LIKE Food of the Gods II: Looking for more natural horror? Food of the Gods (1976), of course! But also check out Night of the Lepus (1972), Frogs (1972), Bug (1975), Jaws (1975), Grizzly (1976), Squirm (1976), Empire of the Ants (1977), Day of the Animals (1977), Orca (1977), Piranha (1978), Alligator (1980), Of Unknown Origin (1983), Cujo (1983), Razorback (1984), Monkey Shines (1988), Slugs (1988), Shakma (1990), Arachnophobia (1990), Ticks (1993), Mosquito (1994), The Ghost in the Darkness (1996), Anaconda (1997), Lake Placid (1999), Rogue (2007), Pig Hunt (2008), Chaw (2009), The Grey (2011), The Bay (2012), The Shallows (2016), 47 Meters Down (2017), Boar (2017) and Crawl (2019).
A scientist with an adorable pet white rat, Neil (Paul Coufos; Chopping Mall) specializes in experimental growth hormones. When a child receives an experimental treatment and becomes a highly aggressive giant kid, Neil is summoned for help.
Whereas part 1 (1976) honed its more thoughtfully-delivered allegory on our mistreatment of the planet, this sequel has a lot to say about the mistreatment of animals at testing facilities but gets lost in its own message as the “messengers” are inadmirably behaving more carelessly themselves than those they accuse. In this case, it’s the criminal behavior of the animal rights activists that create the problem when they vandalize the laboratory and release the growth hormone-exposed rats. Because what could go wrong, right?
The gore is solid and the giant rat attacks have improved their bite a bit since part 1. When we see the first victim’s half-eaten face, you know you’re in for something good. These rats are biting off faces and ripping off arms, leaving numerous chunky fleshy corpses in their wake. This movie offers way more gore shots than its predecessor, including a melty gooey pulsating “super cancer” death (a lot like Stripe’s death in Gremlins).
There are some quirky characters, too. We enjoy a Dirty Harry-wannabe rat exterminator and a college dean who follows the playbook of the worst mayor in movie history. The dean wants to keep everything quiet because of the upcoming grand opening of the pool—which, of course, reminds us of Jaws (1975) and Piranha (1978). But why is it that the police are literally taking orders from the dean!?!?!
The pool massacre is the grand finale. We see giant swimming rats, severed limbs sinking in the deep end, and all manner of panic. There’s also a particularly deep-cut scene involving the white rat and Neil’s girlfriend Alex (Lisa Schrage; Prom Night II).
Pretty fun movie and a solid example of fun, gory 80s horror. I think I like it a bit more than part 1, but both are good in their own ways; one the more classic and delivering a stronger message, the other the more gory-campy and sort of carrying a good message.
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The Movies, Films and Flix Podcast #279: Galaxy Quest, Pig Lizards and Never Surrendering
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Never give up, never surrender! Galaxy Quest is an underappreciated science fiction film that plays like an episode of Star Trek met Three Amigos!, and spawned a totally unique experience. Directed by Dean Parisot, and starring Tim Allen, Sigourney Weaver, Alan Rickman, Sam Rockwell and a plethora of excellent actors, Galaxy Quest has aged beautifully and it was a blast discussing it. In this episode, we discuss pig lizards, rock monsters and the fun documentary Never Surrender: A Galaxy Quest Documentary.
If you are a fan of the podcast make sure to send in some random listener questions so we can do our best to not answer them correctly. We thank you for listening, and hope you enjoy the episode!
You can download the pod on Apple Podcasts, Tune In, Podbean,or Spreaker.
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John’s Horror Corner: Food of the Gods (1976), the classic, allegory-rich natural horror about man-eating giant rats.
MY CALL: An allegory and action-rich H. G. Wells adaptation done right. This movie marks a positive turn for natural and giant animal horror. MORE MOVIES LIKE Food of the Gods: Looking for more natural horror? Well, there’s Food of the Gods II (1989). But also check out Night of the Lepus (1972), Frogs (1972), Bug (1975), Jaws (1975), Grizzly (1976), Squirm (1976), Empire of the Ants (1977), Day of the Animals (1977), Orca (1977), Piranha (1978), Alligator (1980), Of Unknown Origin (1983), Cujo (1983), Razorback (1984), Monkey Shines (1988), Slugs (1988), Shakma (1990), Arachnophobia (1990), Ticks (1993), Mosquito (1994), The Ghost in the Darkness (1996), Anaconda (1997), Lake Placid (1999), Rogue (2007), Pig Hunt (2008), Chaw (2009), The Grey (2011), The Bay (2012), The Shallows (2016), 47 Meters Down (2017), Boar (2017) and Crawl (2019).
From its opening narration, this film’s allegory is abundantly clear—the day will come when nature will find revenge against man for all the pollution he has inflicted upon the Earth. Seeking a quiet retreat to the wilderness, Morgan (Marjoe Gortner; Starcrash, Mausoleum) ventures to a remote Canadian island to discover such natural revenge firsthand.
We are introduced to giant animals almost immediately when Morgan’s friend is attacked by a giant tarantula hawk (or spider-wasp) which gives him some intensely fatal anaphylactic shock. The flying wasps are easily the worst visual effect of the movie—hazy rotoscoped wasp silhouettes awkwardly pivoting in the air—but I got a nice chuckle out of it. Not seeing the cause of the injuries, Morgan approaches a cabin for help only to be ambushed by a 7’ tall chicken!
After the comical event, a local (Ida Lupino; The Devil’s Rain) explains to Morgan that Mr. Skinner (John McLiam) is behind a special nutrient that creates these giant animals, and that it’s all deliberate in an effort to “solve world hunger” with giant livestock. I guess no one realized that creating giant animals would actually require giant amounts of food… since whatever molecular matter that forms giant animals doesn’t form via magic!
From here we get more high-quality (for the 70s) rubber monster shenanigans. A woman is “attacked” by flesh-eating giant caterpillars. Really, she just sees them on her bloody arm and shakes around a bit. It’s hokey and I certainly giggled at the effort. But when it comes to the rats the effects vary wildly.
Approaching shots depict actual mice in natural settings perhaps climbing on a model car or split-screened beside actors to make it seem giant. But the attack shots will show giant rat heads biting at screaming, blood-covered actors as they tear them apart. I may not have been impressed but… it’s fun to watch. If only this was made ten years later the gore would’ve been off the charts. Here, it’s rather tame.
The attacks are pretty bloody but boast little latex wound work. But watching those big hokey rat heads attacking the actors from off-screen (where you don’t see their bodies) is entertaining enough. Oddly, amid all the action, there is an actual on-screen birth scene.
Based on the H. G. Wells story, director and writer (of this adaptation) Bert I. Gordon (Empire of the Ants, Necromancy) did alright! The pacing is quick enough, there are a lot of action scenes, and the concept is cool. Those giant rat attack scenes were surprisingly satisfying. Even today I find this movie pretty entertaining. So if you enjoy the classics, I’d recommend this.
Movies, Films & Flix 