Skip to content
Advertisements

Analyzing the Foot Chase and Sheet Washing in The Texas Chainsaw Massacre Remake

June 6, 2017

I fell asleep while watching The Texas Chainsaw Massacre in 2003. It is a stock remake that looks glossy, plays ugly and I haven’t really given it a second thought. The movie may be forgettable but there is a moment that has stuck with me for years. Watch the clip below and pay attention to what happens during the 1:16 – 1:37 range.

 

 

Here is the breakdown of the 20 second foot chase.

1:16 – 1:30 – Leatherface chases Andy through a never-ending maze of bed sheets.

1:31 – Leatherface veers off and makes a uber sprint

1:37 – Andy has no leg

1:38 – I’m wondering how that would’ve happened.

For years I’ve wondered how a lumbering killer managed to run ahead of a sprinting kid named Andy in the span of seconds. Lately, I’ve become emboldened with my dumb horror statistics and I decided to finally figure out Leatherface’s mad sprint. Here is what happens (according to some math and guesswork). Let’s assume Andy covered 194 feet in 20 seconds according to the standard time/distance of a 9-minute mile.

9-minute mile = 586 feet per minute.

586 / 60 = 9.7 feet per second

194 feet covered in 20 seconds.

He was slowed down a bit by the sheets but there were moments of outright sprinting which lead me to the 9-minute mile approximation. During the first 12 seconds Leatherface is about 10 feet behind him. However, in a five second span the bulky murderer exploded around Andy and managed to chop off his leg. I don’t think Leatherface is a supernatural fellow so I went ahead and did the math to see how he could possibly get around Andy.

Before I get to the numbers I want to discuss the insane amount of sheets hanging up on the property. This involves some guesswork but there are about 20 rows of sheets hanging up outside. It looks like there are three sheets on each row which means the deadly family somehow washed and hung up 60 sheets in a logical and practical manner. Why are they using so many sheets? Here are some questions.

1. The average washer fits several sheets. Did Leatherface do 20 loads?

2. Hand washing each sheet individually would take at least 20 minutes. Did they take 18 hours to hand wash?

3. Why are the dry sheets still out?

4. Do they leave the sheets out to snag people in?

.

Back to the chase! After watching the video way too many times it looks like Andy is running in a pretty straight line. There isn’t much zigzagging or tripping which allows Leatherface to catch up. So, how in the heck did Leatherface manage to get in front of Andy in five seconds?

The art ain’t good but the measurements are close.

In the span of Andy running 48.5 feet (1:31 – 1:36) Leatherface ran around Andy, managed to plant his feet and swing a chainsaw. This means he had to cover at least 72 feet in five seconds to get around the guy to chop off his leg. Thus, Leatherface sprinted to a speed of a 6.1 minute mile during his five second burst. I find it really impressive that a man who is 6’5 and weighs 265 (actual height/weight of actor) can run that fast around sheets while holding a chainsaw.

There you have it! The mystery is somewhat solved. Now I need to figure out those sheets.

If you liked this post make sure to check out my series featuring random data and useless numbers. Start with my groundbreaking posts about Deep Blue Sea and Stellan Skarsgard and Halloween H20 then work your way down the list!

  1. Jet Ski Action Scenes Are the Worst
  2. Analyzing the Unsuccessful Trap in Predators
  3. How Far Did the Shark Travel in Jaws: The Revenge?
  4. How Many Calories Did Shaggy and Scooby Ingest When They Are The Cotton Candy Glob?
  5. The Dolph Lundgren Front Kick Spectacular
  6. How Far Did the Creature From It Follows Travel?
  7. How Many Bullets Missed John Matrix in Commando?
  8. How Long Did it Take Batman to Setup the Bat Fire on the Bridge in The Dark Knight Rises?
  9. Kevin Bacon’s College Degrees
  10. How Fast Does the Great White Swim in Shark Night?
  11. Zara the Assistant and Jurassic World Had a Bad Day
  12. A Look at Elektra’s sandbag trainer in Daredevil
  13. How Far Did Nic Cage Run While Dressed as a Bear In The Wicker Man Remake?
  14. Breaking Down The Mariner vs. Sea Beast Battle in Waterworld
  15. How Long Did it Take The Joker to Setup the Weapon Circle in Suicide Squad?
  16. Michael Myers Hates Blinkers
  17. How Much Blood Dropped During the Blood Rave in Blade?
  18. Jason Voorhees Can’t Teleport?
  19. Michael Myers Loves Laundry
  20. How Far Did the Merman Travel in The Cabin in the Woods?
  21. How Far Did Matthew McConaughey Jump in Reign of Fire?
  22. How Fast can Leatherface Run?
  23. Deep Blue Sea and Stellan Skarsgard
  24. How Far Did Michael Myers Drive in Halloween H20: 20 Years Later
  25. How Did the Geologist Get Lost in Prometheus?
  26. People Love a Bearded Kurt Russell
  27. A Closer Look at Movies That Feature the Words Great, Good, Best, Perfect and Fantastic
  28. An In-Depth Look At Movies That Feature Pencils Used as Weapons
  29. Cinematic Foghat Data
  30. Explosions and Movie Posters
  31. The Fast & Furious & Corona
  32. Nicolas Sparks Movie Posters Are Weird
  33. How Do You Make the Perfect Kevin Smith Movie?
  34. Predicting the RT score of Baywatch
  35. The Cinematic Dumb Data Podcast
  36. What is the best horror movie franchise?
  37. How Fast Can the Fisherman Clean a Trunk in I Know What You Did Last Summer?
  38. It’s Expensive to Feature Characters Being Eaten Alive and Surviving Without a Scratch
  39. How Long Does it Take Your Favorite Horror Movie Characters to Travel From NYC to San Francisco?
  40. What was the Guy’s Blood Pressure in Dawn of the Dead?
  41. Why Were There So Many Lemons in National Treasure?
  42. How Far Does The Rock Jump in the Skyscraper Poster?

 

 

Advertisements
40 Comments leave one →
  1. June 6, 2017 4:02 pm

    Oh man, I love it! This is some sharp, witty stuff here. “Sheet City…” still laughing.

    • June 6, 2017 4:07 pm

      Thanks! The world needed to know.

    • John Leavengood permalink
      June 6, 2017 8:17 pm

      I love that the “end zone” area is label “FREEDOM.” LMAO

  2. John Leavengood permalink
    June 6, 2017 8:35 pm

    Perhaps the sheets were for a little Bed ‘n Breakfast run by the twisted Sawyer family. Although, I doubt they’d ever be so full as to use “all” the sheets, nor would they have so many sheets unless they were running the Bates Motel, and with all the killing they’d likely never get the blood stains outta those sheets. So then they’d just need new sheets every time. Dang! What WERE they doing cleaning all those sheets at once???? This is as daunting as a Sphinx’s Riddle!

Trackbacks

  1. You Have The Right To Remain…Unimpressed: The Maniac Cop Series | Blogferatu
  2. Analyzing the Trunk Cleaning in I Know What You Did Last Summer | Movies, Films & Flix
  3. MFF Special: Movies That Feature Characters Being Swallowed Whole Are Really Expensive to Make | Movies, Films & Flix
  4. MFF Special: Tracking the Merman’s Murderous Journey in Cabin in the Woods | Movies, Films & Flix
  5. MFF Special: Analyzing the Critical/Audience Scores of Kurt Russell’s Movies | Movies, Films & Flix
  6. MFF Special: Figuring Out How the Geologist Got Lost in Prometheus | Movies, Films & Flix
  7. MFF Special: Analyzing Matthew McConaughey’s Record Breaking Jump in Reign of Fire | Movies, Films & Flix
  8. MFF Special: Does the Number of Splits in a JCVD Film Impact the Critical and Audience Scores? | Movies, Films & Flix
  9. MFF Special: Which Horror Villain Could Make it From NYC to San Francisco the Quickest? | Movies, Films & Flix
  10. The MFF Random Data Collection: A Grouping of Cinematic Data That Gives You Answers to Questions You Didn’t Have | Movies, Films & Flix
  11. MFF Special: Does Jason Voorhees Teleport in Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan | Movies, Films & Flix
  12. MFF Special: Tracking Michael Myers Movements in Halloween | Movies, Films & Flix
  13. MFF Special: Blood Pressure + Zombies = A Dawn of the Dead Mystery | Movies, Films & Flix
  14. MFF Special: The Joker Needed 65 Minutes to Setup the Weapon Circle in Suicide Squad | Movies, Films & Flix
  15. MFF Special: National Treasure: The Mystery of the Lemons | Movies, Films & Flix
  16. MFF Off-Season Statistics: Adam Sandler and Release Dates | Movies, Films & Flix
  17. MFF Special: Breaking Down the Mariner vs. Sea Beast Moment in Waterworld | Movies, Films & Flix
  18. MFF Special: Analyzing the Odds Behind Zara the Assistants Demise in Jurassic World | Movies, Films & Flix
  19. MFF Special: Analyzing Dwayne Johnson’s Record-Breaking Skyscraper Poster Jump | Movies, Films & Flix
  20. MFF Special: How Far Does the Creature From It Follows Travel? | Movies, Films & Flix
  21. MFF Special: Analyzing the Similarities Between Ernest Goes to Jail and Paddington 2 | Movies, Films & Flix
  22. MFF Special: How Much Ground Did Nic Cage Cover While Dressed as a Bear in The Wicker Man Remake? | Movies, Films & Flix
  23. MFF Special: Analyzing the Unsuccessful and Unnecessarily Large Trap in ‘Predators’ | Movies, Films & Flix
  24. MFF Special: Analyzing Elektra’s Sandbag Training Scene in ‘Daredevil’ | Movies, Films & Flix
  25. MFF Special: Tracking the Supernatural Sharks Journey in ‘Jaws: The Revenge’ | Movies, Films & Flix
  26. MFF Sea Beast Week: The Great White Shark in ‘Shark Night 3D’ is Crazy Fast | Movies, Films & Flix
  27. MFF Special: How Many Times Will Jason Statham Kick the Megalodon in The Meg? | Movies, Films & Flix
  28. MFF Special: How Many Bullets Missed John Matrix During the Climatic Battle in ‘Commando’ | Movies, Films & Flix
  29. MFF Special: Michael Myers Shouldn’t Do Laundry | Movies, Films & Flix
  30. MFF Special: The Dolph Lundgren Front Kick Special | Movies, Films & Flix
  31. MFF Special: The Collegiate Degrees of Kevin Bacon’s Cinematic Characters | Movies, Films & Flix
  32. MFF Special: Analyzing the Data on Movies Featuring Snowmobile Action Scenes | Movies, Films & Flix
  33. MFF Data: Analyzing the Bat Symbol on the Bridge in The Dark Knight Rises | Movies, Films & Flix
  34. MFF Dumb Data: Brad Pitt’s Movies Score Higher, Make More Money, the More He Eats | Movies, Films & Flix
  35. The Tomatometer Says Stick to Vampire Thrillers and Avoid 1980s Slashers – Good news every day

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: