John’s Horror Corner: Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning (1985), more boobs, body count and masked killer shenanigans advance the Tommy Jarvis story arc.
MY CALL: Perhaps my second favorite in the series (so far), just behind Friday the 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter. Less hokey than its predecessor, but way more raunchy. So far, I’d rank the films, best to worst, as 4-5-2-1-3. MORE MOVIES LIKE Friday the 13th Part V: Obviously, Friday the 13th (1980) and Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981) for sure. Sadly, I’d only suggest part III (1982) for the sake of story continuity (it didn’t impress me at all, but many seem to favor it), but part IV (1984) was quite redeeming. For more classic ‘early modern’ slashers one should venture A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984), Sleepaway Camp (1983), The Burning (1981) and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974).
Part 4 SIDEBAR: Yup, Jason keeps getting “almost, sort of, nearly killed” and then keeps coming back like Wolverine. Part IV ends after 12-year old Tommy (Corey Feldman; Friday the 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter, The Lost Boys, Gremlins, Bordello of Blood) impersonates “teen Jason” and kills him. But the credits freeze on a curious glimmer in his eye. We close with Jason’s skull impaled in the worst injury our killer has sustained in the franchise. If you weren’t yet convinced he was dead, you ought to be now! As for the timeline, part 1 took place in “present day” (1980), part 2 was 5 years later (so 1985), part III continued “the next day” (also 1985), and part IV took place in 1985 immediately after the events of part III starting with Jason in the hospital morgue (a la Halloween II). Bucking the trend, part V jumps forward 5-6 years…
After the traumatic events leading to young Tommy killing Jason, he’s needed more than the occasional therapy session. Now a teenager (17 or 18), after spending years in mental health facilities, Tommy (John Shepherd; Bless the Child) finds himself at something of a halfway house “camp” to help him transition to re-enter society. About as soon as Tommy arrives, another troubled resident chops up one of his peers (over a candy bar) and subsequently people start getting killed by a hockey-masked killer. Only one problem: Jason Voorhees was allegedly cremated! So, who’s hacking everyone up?
Some members of the cast you may recognize include Anthony Barrile (Girlfriend from Hell), Todd Bryant (Night of the Creeps, The Puppet Masters), Dominick Brascia (Evil Laugh, Once Bitten), Bob DeSimone (Savage Streets), Juliette Cummins (Psycho III, Deadly Dreams, Slumber Party Massacre II), Richard Lineback (The Ring), Miguel A. Núñez Jr. (The Return of the Living Dead, Leprechaun 4: In Space), and Marco St. John (Shadow People, Cat People).
Campy SIDEBAR: I felt that part III was incredibly hokey. This sequel remains highly campy, but never really hokey. How’s that? Well, there’s also a LOT more profanity and we basically see the breasts of the entire female cast. For real, there may be more nudity and a broader variety of boobs in this movie than all its predecessors combined (even considering part IV). Back in my Piranha 3DD (2012) review, I dreamed up the movie metric called breast time. “If there was a movie Freakonomics calculation called breast time it would be measured in breast seconds—i.e., the total number of breasts in a movie times the number of seconds that each breast is bare.” Let’s just say Jason saw a lot of boobage in this sequel. It reminded me of other such classy cinema as The Haunting of Morella (1990). Director Danny Steinmann (Savage Streets, The Unseen) never directed another film after this (part V). Not sure exactly why, but I suspect he had trouble recruiting actresses once they understood he wouldn’t let them keep their clothes on. Our final girl, naturally, is the only one who kept her top on. But, just to keep things classy, she duels her murderous opposition wearing a soaking wet white blouse and no bra.
The effects were decent. Some of the death scenes were uninspired filler (e.g., a few off-screen kills and slit throats), but overall the kills were pretty enjoyable. Although weak as a death scene, I liked the “flare death”, and the outhouse death scene was a giggling favorite. Most of the kills were conducted by axe or machete, but we find some garden sheers and head constricting antics peppered in for flavor.
Our killer remains much like Michael Myers in menace, especially in the sense that—for the first time in this franchise—our killer never actually runs. And while he can clearly be hurt (being human still, at this point in the franchise), he doesn’t seem to “fear” his victims when they’re armed—but he doesn’t ignore the threat either. Whereas the first two films punished the would-be staff of Camp Crystal Lake, parts III-V punished seemingly random lakeside vacationers who just happen to be in Jason’s cursed habitat. We also continue to find rehashes of some tactics that worked well in previous franchise films. For example, the old “grab from the back and stab through” (e.g., how his mother killed Kevin Bacon in part 1) and crashing through a splintered door.
BIGGER, BADDER SEQUELS: Jason just kept getting bigger, didn’t he? At least, until now. Ted White (6’4”; Friday the 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter, The Hidden, Demonoid: Messenger of Death) followed Richard Brooker (6’3”; Friday the 13th Part III, Deathstalker), Warrington Gillette (6’1”; Friday the 13th Part 2), and even “the boy in the lake” (Ari Lehman, 5’11”; The Barn, Friday the 13th). No complaints about it—just an observation. But now in part V, our killer (Tom Morga; Halloween 4: The Curse f Michael Myers, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2) is only 6’2”.
This sequel is the first to really generate a story arc around a focal character. We have followed Tommy Jarvis from his childhood trauma into his late troubled teen years and, if we’re being honest, it’s nice to actually know a character for a change. I’m not complaining about movies that populate the cast with nothing more than backstoryless slasher fodder sequel after sequel (e.g., the Wrong Turn sequels). But with such an iconic franchise (entirely theatrical releases, by the way), this provides more synthesis (as with all the character overlap in NOES movies).
Part IV was easily my favorite sequel, but part V is right behind it as my second favorite (so far) in terms of fun factor and rewatchability. We may not have that stage-setting nostalgia of parts 1-2, but these franchise installments are simply more exciting.
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MFF Special: Blood Pressure + Zombies = A Dawn of the Dead Mystery
Dawn of the Dead is one of the greatest horror films ever made. George Romero’s zombie masterpiece was brutal, brilliant and timely. The film centers around four people securing themselves in a mall to protect themselves from zombie hordes. Once they secure the facility they find themselves in a cozy cove of consumerism and start going about their lives in relative peace. However, Their tranquility is interrupted when a bunch of bikers infiltrate the mall and run amok.
There is a moment that has always stuck with me. During the motorcycle carnage, a guy cheekily attempts to get his blood pressure tested and before we could see the results he is brutally murdered via dismemberment. The following post attempts to figure out what the guy’s blood pressure would’ve been had the test been allowed to be completed.
Warning: I am not a medical professional. This post is purely speculative. I have done a lot of research but we’ll never know what this dude’s blood pressure would be. I just thought it would be funny.
Let’s assume the guy (let’s name him Charles “Chuck” Finley) started off with a totally normal blood pressure of 120 systolic/80 diastolic. Life was good for Chuck and he enjoyed a healthy lifestyle, relatively low stress and a rent-controlled apartment with a nice view. However, once the zombie outbreak happened his life became a chaotic mess that left him permanently stressed and dehydrated. Eventually, he found himself joining a ravaging band of motorcyclists (the initiation was a beast) who thrive on death, chaos and terrible zombie battling tactics. Their scavaging lifestyle meant that water/sleep was scarce and canned goods/alcohol were plenty. Due to the constant threat of potentially becoming zombie food, the guy lived in a stressed-out state that left him irritable and paranoid.
During the mall attack, he found himself exerting a lot of energy and he makes a drunken(?) choice to test his blood pressure on a machine. However, due to the fact that he was in the middle of the melee, he gets straight up destroyed by hungry zombies.
Bad things are about to happen.
Here are some important variables.
- Lack of sleep
- Dehydration
- Alcohol consumption
- Sodium-heavy diet
- Physical exertion
- Stress
- Fear
With all of that in mind, I’m guessing that his blood pressure would be around 202/128.
The 202 systolic pressure is easy because Chuck is in the throngs of chaos and between the exercise, stress and physical exertion it’s easy to assume that 200 would be crossed. According to multiple sources, it’s possible for the range to be anywhere from 180 to 220.
128 diastolic is a little trickier because it doesn’t normally rise too much during exercise (sans heavy weight lifting). I’m thinking that the physical exertion (carrying around a mannequin = decent shoulder work out), fear, stress, sodium-heavy food and lack of sleep caused his blood vessels to constrict and heart rate to elevate. Thus, when the action started the pressure had to be greater to push through the artery walls. The short bursts of sprinting, carrying of the mannequin and fear elevated Chuck’s diastolic to easily 128 during the melee.
There you have it! This totally speculative guess puts an age-old question to rest and hopefully brings you peace. If you liked this post make sure to check out my other random data pieces!
- Jet Ski Action Scenes Are the Worst
- Michael Myers Hates Blinkers
- Jason Voorhees Can’t Teleport?
- How Far Did the Merman Travel in The Cabin in the Woods?
- How Far Did Matthew McConaughey Jump in Reign of Fire?
- How Fast can Leatherface Run?
- Deep Blue Sea and Stellan Skarsgard
- How Far Did Michael Myers Drive in Halloween H20: 20 Years Later
- How Did the Geologist Get Lost in Prometheus?
- People Love a Bearded Kurt Russell
- A Closer Look at Movies That Feature the Words Great, Good, Best, Perfect and Fantastic
- An In-Depth Look At Movies That Feature Pencils Used as Weapons
- Cinematic Foghat Data
- Explosions and Movie Posters
- The Fast & Furious & Corona
- Nicolas Sparks Movie Posters Are Weird
- Predicting the RT score of Baywatch
- The Cinematic Dumb Data Podcast
- What is the best horror movie franchise?
- How Fast Can the Fisherman Clean a Trunk in I Know What You Did Last Summer?
- It’s Expensive to Feature Characters Being Eaten Alive and Surviving Without a Scratch
- How Long Does it Take Your Favorite Horror Movie Characters to Travel From NYC to San Francisco?
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MFF Special: Tracking Michael Myers Movements in Halloween
Back in May, I broke down the data on Michael Myer’s Illinois to California road trip in Halloween H20: 20 Years Later. The trip had always fascinated me and I wanted to know how many times he had to refuel and use his turn signal. The idea of an evil murderer using his blinkers made me laugh and it lead to surmising that he used his blinker 57 times due to the route on Google maps. However, after rewatching the original Halloween (1978) I came across a startling discovery. The dude never uses his turn signal (cue semi-dramatic music) and puts in a lot of work to scare Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis).
I know this is a stupid thing to harp on but if you’ve read my posts you know that I love tracking the deadly journeys that horror film characters embark on. I enjoy filling in the blanks and figuring out the intricacies of trips and giving the world something stupid to talk about. I had never considered covering Halloween (1978) before because director John Carpenter and writer/producer Debra Hill admitted that they were “kids” while working on the shoot and many of their one-off decisions (killing promiscuous people) have been given way too much thought. There is something pure about Halloween and that pureness was simply to scare audiences, keep them uneasy and have Michael Myers pop up everywhere at any moment.
For instance, take a look at the ground he covers while hunting poor Annie.
Myers knew the outside of that house very well.
What I love most about Halloween is how in Carpenter’s quest to make the audience “uneasy” he had Michael appear pretty much everywhere which meant he did a lot of walking, running, and hiding behind shrubs. The following post breaks down the various sightings and tracks his movements in three heading scratching scenes. This post is totally unnecessary but hopefully, it gives you a clearer idea into the movements of a famous fictional killer.
Before I get to the three scenes here is a very loose breakdown of Michael Myers movements throughout the film.
- Steals a car
- Kills a guy and steals his clothes
- Arrives in Haddonfield
- Finds childhood home
- Pulls a large gravestone out of the ground
- Robs a hardware store
- Eats a dog?
- Spooks Laurie at school
- Harasses a kid
- Follows Laurie home
- Drives around for like two hours
- Hunts between the two houses and kills another dog….
- Cuts two holes in a sheet and kills a lady.
- Dies?
I want this deleted scene. I need to see the eyeholes be cut.
Here are the three instances where he appears to Laurie then has to make a quick getaway.
1. Moment: Laurie sees Michael staring at her.
How long do you think he was standing there?
Where: Laurie is in a classroom. Michael is standing across the street on the driver’s side of his vehicle.
When: 15:40 – 16:15
How much time did he need to get away? 15 seconds.
How did he do it? I tested this out in my driveway and there is no way he could’ve simply walked around the car and drove away. Michael literally had to run around the car, open the door, start the car and drive away. It is unclear whether the car was on or not. This doesn’t affect the fact that an evil shape had to run around the car to drive away.
Random Thoughts: There are a lot of variables to this scene. The only thing that never changes is that Michael had to run around the car. How did Michael find her? What happens if Laurie looks back to the street faster? How did he time it so perfectly? We do know that she actually saw Michael and it wasn’t a vision (confirmed on 35th anniversary Blu-ray commentary by Carpenter). In those 15 seconds, he had to do more than saunter which I think is pretty awesome.
2. Moment: Laurie sees Michael standing next to some hedges.
.
Where: She is walking home from school. Michael is chilling.
When: 23:41
How much time did he need to get away?: 26 seconds
How did he get away?: He walked around the back of the house and stopped when he got to the clothesline behind Laurie’s house. It’s doable.
Random Thoughts: This moment takes place after Michael slams on the station wagon brakes when Annie yells “Speed kills!” at him. So, he parked the station wagon on the street, ran 200 feet to some hedges (counted their steps) and waited till they came up the sidewalk. I love that Michael must’ve been peering through a crack in the hedges until it was safe to step out. Having Michael play peekaboo with Laurie adds another dimension to the character. He starts to come across as a cheeky/evil fellow who enjoys messing with babysitters.
3. Moment: Laurie sees Michael hanging around some clotheslines.
Where: Laurie is at her house. Michael is hanging out by a clothesline.
.
When: 26:36
How much time did he need to get away: Zero seconds because Laurie is looking at him the entire time.
How did he get away: I’m assuming he waited for a perfect wind to push the sheets up so he could walk into a wooded area.
Random Thoughts: This is the toughest appearance to break down because it happens so quick. I am assuming it happened (per Carpenter) so I’m taking the escape at face value. Logic suggests that Michael sidestepped into the surrounding foliage. However, I’d like to think that he did a quick somersault and propelled himself into the wooded area. That would be awesome!
There you have it! Michael Myers covered a lot of ground and potentially did a somersault to escape Laurie’s view. Hopefully, this post fills in some blanks and lets you know that Michael put in a lot of work during his Halloween hunting!
- Jet Ski Action Scenes Are the Worst
- Jason Voorhees Can’t Teleport?
- How Far Did the Merman Travel in The Cabin in the Woods?
- How Far Did Matthew McConaughey Jump in Reign of Fire?
- How Fast can Leatherface Run?
- Deep Blue Sea and Stellan Skarsgard
- How Far Did Michael Myers Drive in Halloween H20: 20 Years Later
- How Did the Geologist Get Lost in Prometheus?
- People Love a Bearded Kurt Russell
- A Closer Look at Movies That Feature the Words Great, Good, Best, Perfect and Fantastic
- An In-Depth Look At Movies That Feature Pencils Used as Weapons
- Cinematic Foghat Data
- Explosions and Movie Posters
- The Fast & Furious & Corona
- Nicolas Sparks Movie Posters Are Weird
- Predicting the RT score of Baywatch
- The Cinematic Dumb Data Podcast
- What is the best horror movie franchise?
- How Fast Can the Fisherman Clean a Trunk in I Know What You Did Last Summer?
- It’s Expensive to Feature Characters Being Eaten Alive and Surviving Without a Scratch
- How Long Does it Take Your Favorite Horror Movie Characters to Travel From NYC to San Francisco?
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The 2017 MFF Halloween Horror Viewing Guide
The world is inundated with lists telling you which horror films to watch on Halloween. I’m sure they all have their merits but they aren’t looking out for everybody. I wanted to bring you a wide variety of films in order to give you options because not everybody watches the same kind of movies so options are always nice.
I came up with 16 categories and in those categories, I’ve given you the main option and a backup in case you don’t like the first recommendation. Hopefully, you can find something you will enjoy. An added bonus is that all of these films are streaming on either Netflix, Amazon Prime, Hulu, HBO GO or Shudder.
- If you are in the mood for…..
1. Fast Zombies on a Fast Train
Train to Busan (Netflix) – Train to Busan is a fantastic horror film that involves fast zombies, lots of blood and people trying to run up escalators that are going down (it’s terrifying). It helped 2016 become the highest rated year for horror (according to RT) and you will love the new spin on zombies.
- If you aren’t interested. Night of the Living Dead (Amazone Prime, Shudder) – George Romero is the best.
2. Quite Possibly the Most Stressful Experience Ever
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (Amazon Prime) – This film is an absolute classic that is primal, horrifying and beautifully made. If you are looking to be stressed out you need to watch this classic.
- If you aren’t interested: Rosemary’s Baby (Amazon Prime) – The two films are incredibly different but they do a great job of building suspense and ending on some truly memorable shots.
3. Genetically Modified Sharks Running Amok
Deep Blue Sea (Netflix) – Deep Blue Sea is the Citizen Kane of genetically modified shark movies. If you’ve been following me for a while you know that I love writing about it and figuring out the logistics to all the deaths.
- If you aren’t interested: Grabbers (Hulu – Shudder) – Drunk Irish Villagers battle aliens. Grabbers is really ridiculously fun.
4. A Whole Lot of Cannibalism
Raw (Netflix) – Raw is a fantastic little thing that features lots of blood, dark humor and tension. You kinda need to watch it.
- If you aren’t interested: The Silence of the Lambs (Hulu) – These two films feel right together.
5. A killer who doesn’t have a lame backstory
Hush (Netflix) – Hush is a fantastic horror film that does a lot with little and Netflix should be stoked they are streaming it exclusively. I love the film because it plays very practically and features a nameless villain that doesn’t need a backstory or motives. Hush is smart, exciting, and wonderfully simple.
- If you aren’t interested: It Follows (Netflix) – What I love about It Follows is how it is loaded with mystery, patience, and dread. It never stops and it keeps you in a constant state of alert because you don’t know where the following creature will pop up next. That is perfect for Halloween horror!
6. A Vampire mockumentary that is big on blood and humor.
What We Do in the Shadows (Amazon Prime) – “We are werewolves, not swearwolves.” You need to watch this film about cheeky vampires who deal with all sorts of cheeky problems.
- If you aren’t interested: Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon (Shudder)is a cheeky/violent mockumentary that focuses on a budding serial killer who lives in the same world as Freddy, Jason and leatherface.
7. John Goodman being Awesome
10 Cloverfield Lane (Amazon Prime) – 10 Cloverfield Lane is a terrifying chamber thriller that features career-best performances from Mary Elizabeth Winstead and John Goodman. It manages to do a lot with little and proves horror films don’t need masked killers or insane violence to be tense. I really hope that John Goodman is nominated for an Academy Award because he is perfect in the movie.
- If you aren’t interested: Honeymoon (Netflix) – The two films are different but I love how Honeymoon establishes dread and features bad things happening to likable people.
8. The Worst Band Gig Ever
Green Room (Amazon Prime) – Green Room proves that director Jeremy Saulnier (Blue Ruin) is an amazing director. I was on the edge of my seat the entire time and I love how Saulnier makes violence look so ugly and realistic. Nothing is glorified and you will find yourself incredibly nervous for the trapped punk band. Also, Patrick Stewart is awesome as the Neo-Nazi leader because he looks like your nice uncle but he would kill you without a thought. Please watch Green Room.
- If you aren’t interested: Interior (Amazon Prime) – This $15,o00 dollar micro-budgeted horror film is a blast. Director Zach Beckler has made a tiny little thing that hits above its weight. Let the film build and embrace the jump scares.
9. A Patient Horror Film That Builds to Something Awesome
The Blackcoat’s Daughter (Amazon Prime) – The Blackcoat’s Daughter is a slow-burning horror film that builds to something pretty great. I feel like the entire film is based upon one line and as the film progresses it all begins to make sense. It is very simple and effective in its violence, plotting and shock value. In the end, I was pleasantly surprised at the mayhem that had just unfolded in front of me. First-time director/writer Oz Perkins should be applauded for creating a lot with little.
- If you aren’t interested: The Devil’s Candy (Netflix) – The Devil’s Candy is a mean little thing that features a great performance from Ethan Embry.
10. A Lady Having a Very Bad Day
Gerald’s Game (Netflix) – Director Mike Flannagan (Hush, Oculus) was finally allowed to make his dream project and he did not disappoint. This is a rare Stephen King adaptation that compliments the source material and Carla Gugino crushes it. I love this film.
- If you aren’t interested: Tusk (Amazon Prime) – Tusk is weird, however, that is why I kinda love it. Kevin Smith really tried to make a solid horror film and he succeeded.
11. A Single Location Horror Film
Pontypool (Netflix, Shudder) – I still can’t believe how much I loved this movie. It features four people, lots of talking and very effective creeps. It is inventive and fun.
- If you aren’t interested: [Rec] (Shudder) – [Rec] is insane and also features creative almost single location zombie antics.
12. A Western Horror Film
Bone Tomahawk (Amazon Prime) – Bone Tomahawk is a beautifully written horror western that plays with multiple genres while creating memorable characters. It takes its time getting to the violence and I applaud that decision. I understand why it has stayed on the fringes of the mainstream because it can’t be categorized and features lots of patience and extreme body mutilation.
- If you aren’t interested: Carnage Park (Netflix) – Mickey Keating always brings the goods and this thriller is bonkers. I am a big fan of actor Pat Healy (Cheap Thrills, Starry Eyes, Small Crimes) and it is cool seeing him go so unhinged.
13. A Cheeky Modern Vampire Film
Fright Night (Shudder) – Fright Night jumpstarted the modern vampire craze and features some truly inspired acting and special effects.
- If you aren’t interested: Let the Right One In (Shudder – Hulu) – Let the Right One In is the rare horror film that transcends the genre because every element of it is great. It is beloved by critics and horror hounds because it tells a heartbreaking story while featuring lots and lots of blood. You won’t find a better vampire movie out there because there aren’t any.
14. A Dinner Party Gone Awry
The Invitation (Netflix) – The Invitation tells the story of a dinner party gone awry. It is patient, chilling and features the best horror ending of 2016. Director Karyn Kusama does a great job building to an unforgettable climax that will make your head explode (not really). You need to watch The Invitation because it is unexpected, tense, chilling, and features some great beards.
- If you aren’t interested: The Loved Ones (Hulu) – The Loved Ones is awesome and it kinda features a dinner party gone awry. It gets very bloody
15. Adam Scott Bonding With the Anti-Christ
Little Evil (Netflix) – Little Evil is an endearing little thing that plays fast and loose with The Omen references. Director Eli Craig (Tucker & Dale vs. Evil) is a horror comedy maestro who is somehow able to find heart amongst brutal death.
- If you aren’t interested: Tucker & Dale vs. Evil (Shudder, Netflix) – T&D is horror comedy at its best and I love how it successfully subverts the genre while bringing the gore.
16. A Descent into Korean Madness
The Wailing (Netflix) – The Wailing is insane. It is a totally engrossing experience that puts you through the wringer and leaves you feeling tired and kinda gross.
- If you aren’t interested: A Tale of Two Sisters (Shudder) – Embrace the Korean weirdness. You will love it.
Let me know if I missed anything!
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The MFF Podcast #106: Michael Myers, The Merman and Dumb Data
You can download the pod on Itunes or LISTEN TO THE POD ON BLOG TALK RADIO.
If you get a chance please make sure to review, rate and share. You are awesome!
The MFF podcast is back and we are talking about the dumb data that we produce on the site. Whether it be Matthew McConaughey jumping around in Reign of Fire or Leatherface spriting around like a maniac we find the answers to their ancient mysteries. We were recently featured in Wired so we wanted to let you know how we were able to figure out the answers to questions that nobody was asking. You will love it!
As always we answer random listener questions and ponder the dimensions of the Sleepy Hollow town (it gets weird). If you are a fan of the podcast make sure to send in some random listener questions so we can do our best to not answer them correctly. We thank you for listening and hope you enjoy the pod!
You can download the pod on Itunes or LISTEN TO THE POD ON BLOG TALK RADIO.
If you get a chance please make sure to review, rate and share. You are awesome!
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John’s Horror Corner: Friday the 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter (1984), the best in the franchise so far, and introducing zombie Jason.
MY CALL: Perhaps the most exciting of the series so far. This sequel may lack story-based substance, but it makes up for it with…everything else. MORE MOVIES LIKE Friday the 13th Part IV: Obviously, Friday the 13th (1980) and Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981) for sure. Sadly, I’d only suggest part III (1982) for the sake of story continuity (it didn’t impress me at all, but many seem to favor it). For more classic ‘early modern’ slashers one should venture A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984), Sleepaway Camp (1983), The Burning (1981) and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974).
Part 3 SIDEBAR: Part III ended as Chrissy (Dana Kimmell; Friday the 13th Part III, Sweet Sixteen) dreamed of being assaulted by an undead Mrs. Voorhees and awakened to her rescue by the police, leaving behind Jason’s dead body with an axe embedded in his head. As for the timeline, with part 1 occurring in “present day” (1980), part 2 occurring 5 years later (1985), and part III starting the next day (also 1985); this sequel also takes place in 1985 immediately after the events of part III.
Director Joseph Zito (The Prowler) opens with a convenient recap doubling as a supercut of most of the interesting death scenes from parts 2-3. We then watch as Jason’s dead body (as it lay dead in part III’s close) is transported to the local morgue. And you know what that means, right? Yup. We finally have “maybe sort of undead” Jason. As he cuts into his body count with some hapless hospital staff, we see his hands now (and for the first time) looking monstrous.
But he’s not “totally undead.” He still fears injury, runs after victims and can get knocked out by a rambunctious final girl. So, he’s really just yet closer to early Michael Myers in menace, and still short of Freddy Krueger in cursedness. And like both of these other boogeymen, Jason’s purpose seems ever more obscured as the sequels deepen. The first two films punished the would-be staff of Camp Crystal Lake, part III punished some random lakeside vacationers, and part IV targets yet more people who just happen to be in Jason’s cursed habitat.
BIGGER, BADDER SEQUELS: Jason just keeps getting bigger, doesn’t he? Ted White (6’4”; The Hidden, Demonoid: Messenger of Death) follows Richard Brooker (6’3”; Friday the 13th Part III, Deathstalker), Warrington Gillette (6’1”; Friday the 13th Part 2), and even “the boy in the lake” (Ari Lehman, 5’11”; The Barn, Friday the 13th). No complaints about it—just an observation. Oh, and he’s even uglier!
Although not as “cheaply” campy as part III, this sequel has its troped-up moments. Crispin Glover (American Gods, Willard) offers one of the zaniest horror dance performances (up there with Freddy’s Revenge and The Cabin in the Woods), and women continue to skinny dip alone in lakes in the middle of the night (as in part 2) for no good reason at all except, perhaps, to provide the largest boob count of the franchise so far. Meanwhile, Jason is up to his typical homicidal tendencies of amphibious ambushes (although not as dramatic as in parts 1-3), breaking windows, sticking people to walls with sharp objects (a la Michael Myers), and even his front-grab and stab from the rear technique (e.g., how his mother killed Kevin Bacon in part 1).
On that note, the death scenes are decent and well-paced. Calling back part III’s speargun, a dude gets shot in the groin. The death scene itself is just marginally okay, but the scene revels in the silliness of the notion and that will elicit satisfied grins. But, honestly, the best kill was the very last one! But the kills weren’t the only improvement. We finally have some good characters, particularly the positively adorkable Tommy (Corey Feldman; The Lost Boys, Gremlins, Bordello of Blood).
Offering the most nostalgia, part 1 provided us with a cursed lake followed by the legend of Jason himself (part 2). Then part III increased the campyometer (in the form of crudeness and nudity) as Jason got his hockey mask. Now this sequel (part IV) made him “more” unstoppable, a mainstay that would last almost a dozen subsequent movies, and offered up perhaps the most “exciting” franchise installment so far. I’d readily call this one (maybe) the most fun of the first four movies.
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John’s Horror Corner: Cool (2017), Independent Short Film Review.
MY CALL: A clever techno-horror/thriller that doubles as an engaging “choose your own adventure” film. How’s that for something different? I recommend watching (and manipulating the film) with a friend. MORE MOVIES LIKE Cool: For more indie techno-horror try Other Halves (2016), Unfriended (2016), White Noise (2005), Strangeland (1998), Pulse (2001, 2006), Stay Alive (2006) and One Missed Call (2003, 2008).
MORE Indie Reviews: Here at MFF we occasionally do horror short film and pre-release indie film reviews on request. Among recent solicited promotions are Order of the Ram (2013; film), Love in the Time of Monsters (2014; feature length), Interior (2014; feature length), Smothered (2014; feature length), In the Dark (2015; feature length), Brother (2016; film), Other Halves (2016; feature length), Scythe (2016; film). The Belko Experiment (2016; feature film, mainstream theatrical release), The Barn (2016; feature length), Shallow Waters (2017; short), Burn (2017; short), Tethered (2017; short), We Love Selfies (2017; short),.
Disclaimer: This review was solicited by the filmmakers and/or producers who provided privileged access to the film. However, my opinion remains unbiased as I was neither hired nor paid to produce this critical review, nor do I have an investment stake in the film.
Shot from a single angle for its entire running time, Cool is a short thriller about a smart technology system that appears to sabotage a young couple’s comfort beyond their preferred ambient temperature. The owners of a new thermostat install and interact with the HAL-meets-Mother-like device, Cool. We watch from Cool’s immobile perspective as user-error results in more than just some heated emotions. Or was it all user error…?
Writer and director Alex J. Mann (3 Seconds, Me2) has brought us something quite different. When you watch the film, you’ll notice that Cool presents command options (e.g., warm it up vs cool it down) at the bottom of the screen. These command options appear to be a part of the film itself since characters will eventually say “Cool, make it cool” and Cool reacts accordingly After a series of such command choices, the film—like any other film—comes to an end. But watch the film again, and this time use your cursor to choose the command yourself resulting in a different scene as the outcome!
Yeah, we all know which I chose? Spy on Kira. LOL
That’s right! Despite having default choices to avoid poor film pacing, Cool is a “choose your own adventure” film. So, in essence, this film actually holds a few different versions of the story. I played with it a bit and came up with three completely different endings (ranging from utter tragedy, to light twist) and some slight variations with the same ending (altering or adding scenes). It’s kind of fun—especially when you watch it with a friend, trying to come up with different story trajectories. As we watch, I find myself loving the camera dynamic, wherein the camera acts as a character and the human characters feel like they’re interacting with us viewers. So when Cool’s owners react to the device, it feels like they’re confiding in, angry at, or insecure about…us!
This spunky techno-horror short is good on its own (i.e., using the default choices and never using your own mouse). But it’s also a bit more, inherently making it more rewatchable and fun than most other short films. I mean, I just watched this about seven times—in a row. When was the last time you watched a film from start to finish multiple times in a row, and in one sitting? And no, YouTube videos of kittens, sloth babies and skate boarders landing on their balls don’t count. As film fans and critics, we often challenge filmmakers to make something different; something we haven’t seen before. Well, this isn’t exactly what I had in mind. But I’m pleased nonetheless.
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Shriekfest Orlando 2017: Film Festival Review
I had the recent pleasure of attending Orlando’s first ShriekFest, a smaller one-day event satelliting the flagship Los Angeles film festival (October 5-8, 2017) on its 17th year. Thirty-five short films were featured. Being a huge enthusiast of horror anthologies and Neill Blomkamp’s latest short film releases (Zygote, Firebase, Rakka) via Oats Studios, I delighted in the variety of styles and flavors that befell the screen.
Any of these films would have fit comfortably in a horror or sci-fi anthology movie and, actually, maybe some of them actually will. Films like Agatha and Tethered appealed to dark cautionary fairy tale fans—as you might find in a more mature realization of Creepshow (1982). Some even had a more random ABCs of Death (2013) vibe to them. For example, Daemonrunner and Classified offered a ghostbusting sci-fi videogame draw; Miscast, Play Day and Good Morning seemed more concerned with having fun than creating a serious narrative (not that there’s anything wrong with that); and Savor was a silly (though very well executed) 15-second scene.
Foxwood, Santapocalypse, Jack, Burn, Humbug and Megrim were more cheeky—befitting such funny anthology films as A Christmas Horror Story (2015), Trick ‘r Treat (2007) or Holidays (2016), which offered a lot of dark humor. Honestly, I feel like these filmmakers should be using festivals to get together and form their own anthology films. Withheld, Ghosted, Red Handed and Psycho Therapy would all fit well together into a sexually themed horror anthology. The Witching Hour, Jack, Foxwood, Humbug, Miscast and Santapocalypse could go towards forming a sequel anthology to Holidays (2016).
A few of these shorts deserve further exploration, even if only adding 5-10 minutes. I’m not at all saying this is indicative of a flaw in the short films—quite the opposite. I’m compelled by them! I wanted to know more about the monstrous girl chained in the bedroom (Agatha), and a more clarified irony of our gruesomely jack-o-lanterned victim (Jack). Whereas Remnants, Echoes of the Past and The Armoire felt like tasters for potential feature length films.
Of course, as with an anthology movie, I didn’t expect to enjoy all of the films. Some weren’t stellar, others (softer and/or dramatic science fiction) just weren’t what I wanted to see in a festival with “shriek” in the name. For example, Still Here was a soulful and gorgeously shot “last man on earth” premise, but just didn’t ‘fit’ the venue or event ‘mood’ for me. Call it personal preference, but I’d rather see the films grouped into program blocks following closer to their theme/style.
My personal favorites were Burn (boasting equal parts candid sincerity and cruelty, with amazing characters), Tethered (gorgeously shot and harrowing), Blood Sisters (wonderfully executed circumstantial horror comedy), Megrim (light-hearted humor about a haphazard torturer who we likened to a kinder, gentler Human Centipede doctor), Agatha (great creepy draw, even if familiar), Six 2nds to Die (a gory, light-hearted comedy which amusingly felt like it would have made a great “Commercial” to advertise Shriekfest), Cherry Pepper (the Napoleon Dynamite of black comedy horror), and Nightlight (a brief yet sympathetic short about the monster under your bed).
Excerpt from my full Burn review about a particular character/actor: “Kindly playing a father whom his son will never know, Max Cavenham brings a candid compassion to the screen. His performance, complemented by solid editing work, breathes humanity into this role—and a challenge it certainly is to truly relate to short film characters in such short time… If there is a take home message here, the thing I’ll remember most about this film, it actually won’t be the sort of double-twist zinger (which I quite enjoyed). Nope. For me it will be [the] endearing father, nervously and meticulously preparing videos for his unborn son with such tender care. In those show-stealing moments Max Cavenham was brilliant! So much more than just “great scenes (that happen to be) in a horror movie,” the heart of those opening scenes transcends the genre and would shine in any film of any genre. Imagine that, real filmmakers making horror.”
Before their festival circuit release, I had the pleasure of reviewing Burn and Tethered. In fact, it was one of the Tethered filmmakers that invited me to Shriekfest. That in mind, I’d invite any independent filmmakers to send us their work.
Excerpt from my full Tethered review: “At but a brief 12 minutes, I was captivated in minute one… Consistently thoughtful, well-practiced and technically sound shots leave us at the mercy of the film’s atmosphere. The camera lingers on a boy’s weathered face… we are taken aback by the circumstances of his existence as his mother’s harrowing voice plays on a cassette-tape recording narrating the “rules” by which the abandoned blind boy lives, tethered to a weary wooden shelter surrounded by bells and animal traps… The acting and camerawork were exemplary; the editing…perfect, abrupt, uneasing. The film opened powerful intrigue overlaying melancholy, with the rigid remoteness and fable-like rules beckoning memories of the finer qualities of The Village (2004), the tip-toeing isolation in The Witch (2016) or the opening shots in The Hallow (2015). The finer moments of the sound editing/mixing (e.g., the rabbit scene) really dropped me deep down the abyssal mystique of this dark woodland fantasy that all viewers, by now, fear will be a cautionary tale of dire consequence… 0:44-0:58 (i.e., “the 1st rule”) were 14 of the best seconds of editing I’ve seen this year. It reminded me of the pub/pint pouring excellence (the brief, quick-cut montage) of Shaun of the Dead, only harrowing! A man appreciative of nuance, director Daniel Robinette breeds mood and mystery into this fantastic film—especially in those first two minutes. He’s generated all I need to support whatever he next pursues. Solomon’s desperation is as tattered as his clothing, and his soul-broken longing noted each time he pushes “rewind” on his mother’s departing message.”
Having never been to a film festival before, this was a real treat for me. Passersby on the streets of Sanford wandered over from the Saturday farmer’s market to buy a 2-hour block ticket (about 9 short films), only to stay and buy another block once it ended. I brought a horror fan friend of mine who had also never been to such an event and, despite its smaller scale, she loved it as much as I did. So I certainly hope that Shriekfest Orlando finds its 2nd Annual date in October of 2018.
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John’s Horror Corner: Happy Death Day (2017), Groundhog Day (1993) meets Scream (1996) in this surprisingly entertaining college slasher.
MY CALL: The Groundhog Day (1993) callbacks are frequent, satisfying and most importantly self-aware in this delightful stalker movie. It was fun, jumpy, tense, engaging and…did I mention FUN? Go see this. MORE MOVIES LIKE Happy Death Day: I can’t believe I’m going to say this to you, horror fans. But, for real, go see Groundhog Day (1993)—it’s like Stephen King wrote a comedy. I’d strongly recommend Scream (1996) if you haven’t seen it—great metamovie. Also Hush (2016), simply as another clever slasher/stalker film.
I have to admit, I didn’t necessarily expect this to be more than an entertaining (if good) little horror flick with a feisty gimmick playfully riffing on a favorite ‘90s comedy: Groundhog Day (1993). But little did I know, this film was directed by one of the writers of Paranormal Activity 2-3 (2010-2011; also 4 and Marked Ones, but I was less a fan of them) and the outstanding teen thriller Disturbia (2007). Director Christopher Landon (Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse) has the gifts of sophomoric humor, mature slow-building tension, and well-invested characters that earn audience sympathy. All three find themselves well-married in this actually quite delightful horror movie!
The plot is simple (especially if you’ve seen Groundhog Day): a college student relives the day of her murder over and over again in a cycle presumably only broken by preventing her own death. That hapless victim is Tree (Jessica Rothe; The Tribe, Parallels), and her day repeatedly starts with awakening in a strange dorm room with a major hangover and no recollection of the night before.
The Groundhog Day callbacks are frequent, clearly deliberate (as indicated in the last few minutes of the film), and I delight in them! Those familiar with the 1993 comedy will envision Bill Murray throwing his bedside radio, killing himself, eating with reckless abandon, predicting random events, being mean, being nice, being hypercognitive…I smiled a lot watching this. Tree’s relationships with those she encounters on her time-looped birthday radically shift from normal, to confused, to paranoid, to slapstick, to constructive.
The writing was solid, the camerawork was good, the pacing was great, I liked the story…I have (honestly) no complaints. I also thought the cast all did great! Some notables from the cast include Israel Broussard, Ruby Modine and Rachel Matthews. Oh, and Jessica Rothe knocked it outta’ the park! The repetition of the day’s events give us ample opportunity to flesh out characters presented to us in the context of a First Act—which was really cool.
For the squeamish, this film will be fine. There’s a bit of blood and no real gore. Rather than relying on shock-cinema gore stylings, this film rides the wave of dreading Tree’s next encounter with her killer…and it all works well! She never encounters the killer the same way twice (which actually makes sense in the end) and we are often edgy about just whom the killer actually is. There’s also quite of bit of Scream -esque (1996) humor stitched between the suspense.
We even find a lot of non-comedic humor in the irony and awkwardness of reliving the same events again and again. It’s all rather charming and, much to my surprise, manages to proceed uninhibited by the killer’s odd baby-faced mask.
I’m gonna’ say it. This movie was delightful. It was a lot of fun, had a fair balance of jumps and legit tension, the story was engaging and the delivery was self-aware. Highly recommended, probably highly rewatchable as well, and I intend to buy it. Enjoy!
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Personal Shopper: A Ghost Story Done Right
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Personal Shopper is a neat little thriller that plays like a ghost story inside an arthouse film surrounded by mystery. I appreciated how director Olivier Assayas imbues the film with a relaxed tone that builds suspense while taking its time. Much like recent “horror” films like Spring, The Witch, It Comes at Night, The Invitation and The Gift it plays with mystery/horror tropes and combines them with sensitive themes of loss. Personal Shopper will alienate many but I loved its tone and patience.
Personal Shopper focuses on a personal shopper named Maureen (Kristen Stewart) who spends her days buying stuff for a very needy and often cantankerous celebrity. The work is unimportant and you can tell that Maureen only does it for the cash. On the side, she works as a medium of sorts and things get weird when she starts getting texts from someone who might be her twin brother who recently died of a heart attack. From there, the film never goes where you expect and builds to a somber conclusion that you will either appreciate or dislike (there is no middle ground with this film).
What I love most about Personal Shopper is how it balances being a ghost story while offering a reflection on loss. Some may see it as a “Kristen Stewart looks at a phone” film but I really enjoyed Stewart’s performance and the blending of mystery and truth. Assayas has found a way to capture Stewart’s introverted presence really well and after The Clouds of Sil Maria he knows her beats/style and trusts her enough to basically keep her onscreen for every second of this film.
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Personal Shopper represents a new(ish) wave of introspective horror that is either beloved or massively disliked. Personal Shopper and the films mentioned above don’t stick to the horror/mystery template and instead fuse various elements together. The results can be frustrating for unsuspecting horror hounds but they can be equally rewarding for people who embrace everything the horror genre has to offer. Films like this are changing the definition of the term “horror” and I love all the conversations surrounding the evolving genre.
If you are in the mood for a somber ghost story/mystery I totally recommend Personal Shopper.
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